audhd 🩵 tiff

They often have extremely vulnerable nonspeaking autistic offspring (of all ages from toddler to adult) and never hesitate to trot them and all their struggles out as a gotcha to shut down autistic advocates.

It’s usually something like:

“My kid is so severely autistic they can’t read or type, they wear diapers, smear their poop and beat themselves until they bleed, they will never live a normal life and I’d cure them in a second if I could! You don’t care about my child and you don’t know what real autism is!!!”

It’s so dehumanizing and mean.

No parent who loves their offspring talks about them like these martyr autism parents talk about their offspring behind their back.

The problem isn’t the autistic person, it’s the system failing to help these parents take care of them and give them a good life where they don’t have to self injure or scream or get their needs met.

Autistic advocates are fighting to create these systems and we have to deal with people who won’t even listen to us. By fighting against us too, these parents are going to destroy what is supposed to be a better world for their autistic offspring.

I don’t get it their logic, and I’m so tired of trying to explain all that (“No, that’s not what it’s about, I care about your child’s life and future…”) before I can even get to the meat of “this is what we’re actually trying to do.”

1. Unplug from social media and, if possible, switch off your phone.

2. Try to drop all non-essential commitments.

3. Make sure you get out of the house. Deliberately change your environment each day.

4. Make a list of the things you CAN do, and begin by changing at least one of them.

5. Get a grip of the negative thought patterns. Try to focus on something positive.