just the shit you can't make up

I love you, vintage gay Pikachu. You’ll find the boy for you, I promise.

Girl whose most frequent mistake is inaction voice: wow I keep making mistakes I better not do anything

i am strange and i look like a peppermint. is that ok .

bus is my friend. shes no train but shes trying her hardest in a world that hates her

you have to get into potato and leek soup

hey bro qick question .do i seem like a person to you

Vaginismus of the soul

whoops lost myself for about eight years there

Dude, I only fucked your boyfriend cause I’m an empath. I wanted to understand you… forgive me for being a good fucking friend I guess.

"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back