I watched it again. I have realized something, and I wanted to share it.
That fish still had a human heart mixed in with the blood delirium. She was desperate for Simon to never get that box to the surface not because she wanted him to suffer, not because she wanted the others to continue to come down one by one to be eaten by the sea — that’s what the sea wants.
No, the human within her horrific, mangled body is terrified that the black box holds hope. False hope. She was the one down there, she was the one who was there and witnessed exactly what was on that black box. She lived it. She knows that whatever she found before she succumbed to the sea might gather hope within the meager masses that they aren’t doomed, that the truth, the secrets to everything within the Quiet Rapture, lies within the bottom of the blood sea, and of course they must get it — they must send more down to get it, now that they have what they consider “proof”.
But she knows her fate, and she never wants the same for those she cares about. (Ava? Is that you?) She wants everything within this sea to be abandoned and forgotten about so the others have a fighting chance to survive. The blood sea wants to lure every single living soul down to become one with it, it hungers for more and more blood so it may sprout more roots and breathe new, twisted life into the humans it consumes.
Fish can’t leave the ocean. She’s stuck down there, along with the others the sea has taken. She wants the others who are still human, still out of the blood sea’s grasp to leave and never come back — she wants the others to survive.
She follows him carefully at first. She even causes turbulence in the hopes of warding them off — Simon tries to heed her warnings (it’s too dangerous, it's not worth it) but the others are too blinded by hope, hate and desperation to listen.
The sub goes back down. Why? Why did he come back? Why didn't they listen? Must I take you where I died and was reborn anew?
Must I share an explicit warning, my own grave? Let me cut your ties and take you there, Simon. See it with your own eyes; we are doomed.
(I never told you my name. How did you know my name?)
Simon is crucified, but not for humanity. He is holy in flawed ways, he is trying to make the correct decision for once but he is scared and sick and infected, and of course he does not trust a telepathic fish monster who swings wildly from the truth (you are dooming us all) to hive mind delirium (the light, it is everything, can't you see?). She catches herself several times slipping in and out of lucidity; she tries to tell him (nevermind about the light. That’s not important) don’t look don’t look don’t look.
Why else would there be a huge hole in SM-8 that looks as if there was an explosion from the inside, that got out, not in? That was her.
She, too, is willing to risk herself for the greater good. She, too, thinks this is bigger than me.
It will kill them all, she says, desperate. You can’t do this. She attacks in pure panic when he has exactly what she knows must stay buried. She knows that he is going to become just like her — she knows that he will likely kill her as he transforms in her maw, shattering her in the process. She does it anyway.
(The ship is alive, can't you see? )
The last shots within the sea has Simon transforming and blowing out of SM-13. A mirror of her. Tendrils billow out — he is bigger than she ever was, and he won’t ever have to bite — he will be able to grab and sink, drag closer and closer to the light, even if he wishes not to. They share this fate. They are now one in the same. ( Why you, Simon? Why you?!?)
The black box isn’t hope, not really.
It’s false prophecy, and it is covered in blood.
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