well, my sister’s a ship…

Summary: Inara helps Simon explore something. Kaylee’s playing catch-up, but she don’t mind that much.

Word Count: 2,007

Summary: Mal’s being a little picky about who their pilot should be, until he sees the same name crop up over and over.

Word Count: 2,624

Notes: written for the june 3rd prompt: disability for wash wednesdays!

for anyone who wants to use the prompts/themes, here’s a reminder! but also literally do whatever you want. the idea is first and foremost to make things about / related to wash

If everyone on the crew were modern day internet influencers, what sort of content would they be making?

sorry this took 5 approximate forevers! (if y’all ever see my executive dysfunctioning no you don’t)

tysm for the ask! 💕

mal: handy diy hacks and tutorials for a variety of topics. because why the fuck is he gonna pay for anything he can do himself. he will teach you how to build a bookshelf and jumpstart or hotwire a car and paint your ceiling and pasteurize your own milk you can DO IT he BELIEVES IN U. really resents that he has to take ad deals for this to be a viable venture for him.

zoe: struggled with zoe so bad i’m so sorry zoe my love. i think what i’m landing on is athletics/physical challenge videos? it starts as a form of therapy exercise but she gets kinda big online? lots of rockclimbing and hiking and soccer and trying out those “impossible workout routines”. she likes showing people modifications they can do. her comment section is heavily moderated and she is NOT afraid to turn the option off bc it’s a privilege.

wash: based on my longstanding headcanon of wash as a music guy, music reviewer type! has an impressive vinyl collection. known for listening to ever kind if music that exists and his lasting love for weird al. has collaborations with the most RANDOM people.

inara: a little bit of beauty and a little bit of wellness, i think? makeup and perfume and lotion but also candles and tea. has a side channel where she does daily yoga vlogging. has this very elusive allure where people are so utterly enamored by her that they feel very personally attached even though she never says ANYTHING about her personal life!

jayne: guns. gun safety. aim training. antique guns. latest model reviews. would y’all be mad if i said i think he is well-known in the conservative-online community

book: cooking channel! he makes his favorite recipes and tries new things that people suggest and recounts stories from his travels, occasionally getting into spirituality mode. very known for being the kind of content that’s nice/comforting to fall asleep to.

simon: this man does not know work-life balance. medicine. debunking medical myths and general public education. some of those “real doctor reacts to [xyz]” videos. does a lot of sponsorship research and refuses to promote anything that makes unsubstantiated health claims. gets in into some internet beef over it with another influencer.

river: cryptic 4+ hour video essays where she never ever shows her face but they’re known for her voice captivating people. about just about anything you can name though mythology, literature, art, philosophy, and theoretical physics and its relationship to, well, everything are all common threads.