Jimmy couldn’t help but think something was wrong with him. He attracted women so effortlessly – an everyday superpower that most men would give a whole arm for. And, as sweet and pretty as most of these women were, he couldn’t bring himself to do what he was expected to do with their attention. Whether they knew it or not, he tried so hard to make it work, but ultimately he couldn’t. Some of them were patient and understanding. Some of them thought he’d messed around with their feelings. If he wasn’t so confused and so in his own head about what the hell was the matter with him, he might have felt even guiltier about it.

Was he even attracted to women? The question had popped up in his mind a few times. Maybe if he got propositioned by someone who wasn’t a woman, that would be that. He’d be fully into it. He’d just be one of those gay dudes who women couldn’t help but fall for. But, he wasn’t gay, either. That's not to say he was straight. When he thought about it, he liked the idea of dating anyone, no matter what their gender was. His problem – the thing he couldn’t get over – was the whole thing of him not being all too eager about sex, contrary to what people might assume given his strange magnetism.

Sex was this vital aspect of relationships – Jimmy knew that. And, he knew, if he didn’t feel sexual attraction to anyone, and if sex wasn’t part of any ideal future relationship he might have, it’d be a dealbreaker for a lot of people. It had been. So, to stick himself with a label that could potentially doom him and his prospects at finding a relationship… well, as much as the label resonated with him, and as much comfort as he found in knowing that he wasn’t alone, he was a little scared, truth be told.

This worry loomed over him as he started to fall for you. It was why he held off on asking you out, because it seemed unfair to be the one to initiate anything with you if he knew full well that he wouldn’t be able to give you what all of his past partners had wanted. But, as always, he only had to wait for you to ask him. You were so nervous that he’d have felt cruel turning you down – not to mention, of course, he really did want to go out with you. And, so he did. He was so charmed by you that, after a few dates, he almost— almost— forgot about the issue of sex. But, the more he felt himself falling for you, the guiltier he felt. There wasn’t any reason for him to feel guilty, of course.

Regardless, that guilt is why he found himself sitting across from you at a quaint little diner – his suggestion, his treat. As he’d hoped, it was pretty much deserted, besides a group of four teenagers sitting on the opposite side of the diner and the two waitresses who were busying themselves by cleaning tables. The pair of you sat in silence as you ate. It would have been comfortable if Jimmy wasn’t agonising over the idea of telling you about the thing that had ended so many promising relationships. Even though he was close to full, he wished he had another burger or another serving of fries to keep his mouth out of action. But, he knew that it’d be better for the both of you if he just got this over with. Delaying the inevitable would only make things worse.

“So, uh—” He cleared his throat. “I think I’d better tell you something before things get too serious.”

“Sure.” You covered your mouth as you spoke, the last bite of food still mushed up in your mouth. “Is everything okay?”

He scratched his eyebrow and let out a nervous chuckle.

“Yeah. No. I mean, I don’t know.”

You grabbed your napkin and scrubbed the corners of your mouth and your fingers, conscious of the fact that you didn’t want to have shit all over your face when Jimmy was talking about something serious.

“What’s up?”

“I… I don’t know how to explain it all that well. But, I, uh, I guess… people assume I’m, like, some ladies man and that I sleep around. Maybe you do too. But, actually, I’m not into… sex.” 

You nodded.

“Okay.”

“I like you – I really like you,” he added, panic in his tone. “But, not in a way that involves sex… And… if that’s a dealbreaker for you, that’s okay. I just… I figured I should tell you now, before things go too far.”

As he awaited his fate, he looked anywhere but at you. Though, the second you spoke, his eyes darted straight to you.

“I don’t wanna put words in your mouth or make you label yourself or anything but… are you asexual?”

“Probably. Yeah.”

“What about aromantic?”

He shook his head.

“No. Just—just… asexual.”

You noticed his hesitation to use the word and you offered him a small, reassuring smile. He’d barely said the word aloud before – about himself, anyway. It’d cycled through his head plenty of times but it still scared him with how definitive it felt, no matter how accurate it was to his experience. Every time he’d tested it out, it filled him with nerves as much as it relieved him, in the way that only the truth could. 

He knew there was nothing wrong with him or any other ace person. Not everyone agreed with that, and even those who were accepting of asexuality weren’t always open to dating ace people. The people he attracted tended to fall in that latter camp. At the very least, it was nice to be met with support even when it was, more often than not, the end of things, like with any incompatibility in a relationship. He couldn’t begrudge anyone for their needs in a relationship, in the same way he hoped they didn’t begrudge him for his, but he couldn’t deny that it hurt.

“Well,” you said. “I don’t want to take away from your moment or anything, but this is probably a good time to tell you that I’m asexual.”

Jimmy stared at you for a moment before replying.

“You’re asexual?” 

“Yep.”

“So…”

“So, you don’t have to worry about sex with me, okay? The feeling’s mutual. No offence. Your charms only work so much on me.”

At that, Jimmy let out a much needed laugh. His posture relaxed as all that built-up tension left his body. A wobbly smile tugged at the corners of his lips. Tears brimmed his eyes. You reached across the table and grabbed his hand; you knew exactly how he felt, having been in his position plenty of times. It broke your heart that he’d been so nervous, no doubt from rejection after rejection. It wasn’t all doom and gloom for ace people, of course – this moment was evidence of that – but it sure felt like that sometimes. You’d be lying if you denied getting a little choked up as well.

At first you liked the jokes. They started not long after you came out to your family, explaining that you didn’t have sexual attraction. Your dad had responded with the joke “At least I don’t have to worry about you getting pregnant.” But now it was weeks later, and the jokes hadn’t slowed down, and it went from funny, to annoying, to pissing you off. It went from it being like his way to show he supported you, to making fun of you.

Your uncle saw you were getting frustrated and several times had told your dad to knock it off a few times, and you had even told your dad a few times now that it wasn’t funny anymore. But he still persisted. It wasn’t a surprise that you were soon hanging by a thread, and this last joke finally cut it. 

At the time you were having food at a diner, and so you got up and stormed out, and went and got in the back of the Impala. You got in the back, crossing your arms, brooding and waiting for your uncle and dad to come out. It took them a while, but soon they came out. Your dad looked a bit deflated, and your uncle gave you a smile through the window as he came around the car and got in. Your dad didn’t say anything on the drive home.

As soon as you got home, you got out the car and went immediately to your room. As you were walking away you heard your dad call your name before your uncle told him to leave you alone. Even Sam sounded fed up with him, and you didn’t have to doubt he was gonna yell at his older brother. 

You shut the door to your room and jumped on your bed, grumbling with frustration. You wanted to yell at him. You were thinking about wishing that you’d never told him, which was upsetting to think about. If you hadn't told him, he wouldn’t be making these jokes. Was these jokes actually him meant to be at your expense and him passively saying he didn’t support you.

A quiet knock came from your door. “Y/n, can we talk?” Your dad asked you. You didn’t answer at first, but soon huffed, getting up and opening the door for him. You looked up at him with a rather disappointed glare before going and sitting back on your bed. “You’re really pissed off at me, huh?” You didn’t answer, just looking ahead. Dean sighed, coming and sitting down beside you. “You have every right to be angry at me… I’ve been a dick, and I’m sorry.” He apologised. 

“I’ve been asking you to stop with the stupid jokes for weeks now- so has Uncle Sammy.” You grumbled, crossing your arms. 

“Yeah and I should have respected that… Tell you what. We’ve got some cherry pie in the fridge, we heat it up and you can tell me exactly how you’re feeling and what you want from me. How does that sound?” He offered. You accepted by standing up and walking out to go to the kitchen and your dad followed. 

You sat at the table as your dad heated it up, and soon he came over and put a slice in front of you and sat opposite you. “Alright, let loose.” 

“... I used to like the jokes. But now it feels like you’re making fun of me, and it’s like you don’t accept me but won’t outright say it, in a way so that if I did bring up before now you could deny it… do you accept me?” You started. Dean leant on the table to get closer. 

“Of course I do honey. You could come to me tomorrow and say you’ve figure out that you’re not asexual and you indentify as something else, and I’d still accept you. No matter what I’d love you, kid. Don’t ever doubt that… I made the jokes because I wanted you to feel comfortable around me about it, and I guess I was so concerned about wanting you to feel happy about it that I went overboard and did the opposite.” He explained, and you nodded. “So, no more jokes about asexuality?” 

“You can joke about it, just… not as much?”

“Okay, what’s my limit?” 

“One every two weeks. Also you can bring it up to any guy who tries to flirt with me.” You told him. 

“Is that part of the test to see if he can get my approval?” Dean questioned and you nodded. “Okay… none of them are gonna get my approval anyway so…” Dean commented before taking a bite of his pie, making you laugh lightly. 

Hope you like it! If you have any questions, please send them in!

*Not my gif

At least one of them (by that, I mean Nadja, Laszlo or Nandor) tried to seduce you before they found out that you’re asexual.

Take your pick.

Despite their wounded pride and mild disappointment of you not being sexually attracted to them, they’d still be happy to be friends with you.

I feel like Guillermo and Colin would be the most understanding of asexuality.

Nadja, Laszlo and Nandor at least somewhat get it too- in their centuries on the Earth, they’ve met all different kinds of people, asexuals included.

But, if you’re an ace who doesn’t have sex, they do express pity you for not experiencing sex, something they all thoroughly enjoy.

Also, Nandor has definitely made some sort of comment about aspiring to your ‘strength and willpower’ for managing to go for so long without sex.

The guy genuinely thinks you possess the strength of a thousand average sized men.

Also, I’m sure at one point or another Laszlo has offered to ‘relieve you, if you’d like’.

It’s supposed to be a generous gesture of friendship.

Of course, Guillermo rolls his eyes whenever any of them make a comment of this nature.

Nandor, Nadja and Laszlo don’t really understand how one can live without experiencing sexual attraction.

They’re all respectful of your sexuality, though; it’s not a matter of them looking down on you.

Basically, they’re not aphobic; just comically sex-obsessed to the point of them having a slightly myopic worldview.

I can imagine that it’s somewhat difficult to fit into the vampire community when you’re not particularly interested in sex.

See: the Bi-Annual Vampire Orgy.

That said, if it’s a well-known fact in the community that you’re asexual, then I feel like most vampires would be understanding and considerate of it, because I said so, and the whole thing about some vampires having existed for so long that they’ve met plenty of different kinds of people.

Of course, you’re always welcome to attend the orgies for the food and social aspect of it.

I imagine that, if anyone does disrespect you, your boundaries, your sexuality etc., Nadja will be the most protective of you.

You can probably stand up for yourself, but she always has your back if you need it.

Overall, your vampire friends are accepting of you.

They won’t try to change you or convince you that you’re not who you are.

“Guillermo!” you greeted. Who knew you’d run into him in the party aisle of the supermarket?

You briefly eyed the camera crew who were following him and filming you.

Initially, he smiled genuinely, but faltered when he heard Nandor approach him from behind, remembering the vampire’s presence. However, he managed to promptly plaster the smile back on his face.

“Y/N! Hey...” he replied, his voice trembling slightly.

The unfamiliar man now beside him glanced between the two of you uncertainly, but his eyes finally landed on you. His smile seemed a tad strange, but it was endearing in its own way nonetheless.

“Guillermo,” he said, revealing his foreign accent, though you were more fixated on his eccentric (albeit quite snazzy) outfit. “Who is this?”

“Uh...this is my friend...Y/N.” Guillermo introduced stiffly. He looked over at you. “Y/N, this is...Nandor.”

“My, my, Guillermo,” Nandor murmured. “Your friend smells delectable.”

“Oh, uh, thanks, I guess.” you said sheepishly. “It’s just deodorant, though.”

Nandor looked at you blankly, though he continued to smile. He leaned down to Guillermo, bending his knees awkwardly so his mouth was level with his familiar’s ear.

“Guillermo, why don’t you invite them to the orgy?” he whispered with all the subtlety of a lightning strike. Guillermo’s face fell.

Your eyes widened and you swallowed your saliva.

“An...orgy?” you repeated incredulously. “That’s nice of you...to invite me. But, I’m not really an orgy kind of person. Or a sex kind of person, really.”

Noticing Nandor’s faded smile, you couldn’t help but continue to ramble to this man you barely knew. Heat rose to your cheeks.

“I’m not judgemental!” you blurted, painfully aware of Guillermo’s grimace (though you misinterpreted its meaning). “I’m just asexual...so I’m not really into people...in the sexual way...”

You finally forced your mouth shut.

“Even better.” Nandor declared. 

His smile returned, even wider than before. You knitted your brows.

“Um-”

“You do not have to partake in the sexual intercourse.” he insisted. “You can come...for the food. There will be-”

Once again, he leaned down to speak in Guillermo’s ear. Guillermo stared into the lens of the camera. You glanced over at the camera too.

“Guillermo, what do these asexuals eat?”

Guillermo sighed, but his eyes almost lit up when he realised he may have had a way out of this conversation.

“Garlic bread.”

“No! You know that won’t do.” Nandor hissed at him scornfully. “Fucking guy.

“What else?”

“Cake...” Guillermo conceded through gritted teeth

“Cake?” you repeated. “I’m down for cake.”

Nandor grinned and rubbed his hands together in glee. “Cake you shall have, then.”

As you looked on at Todd from across the table in the semi-packed diner, you couldn’t help but wonder what secret he could possibly harbour that would make him this anxious. 

Was he a meth dealer? Had he partaken in murder?

It wasn’t as though you two had been best friends back in high school, but you liked to think you’d known him well enough back then and that you knew him well enough now to be able to confidently assume he wasn’t capable of doing either of those things, at least on purpose. 

Todd could definitely do both of those things by accident...especially on the same day.

So, maybe he was a meth dealer and/or had assisted a murderer.

You were far too optimistic to believe Todd was capable of murder, only manslaughter or unwittingly being an accessory to murder.

The way his gaze was fixed on his lap as he twiddled his thumbs reminded you of yourself when you had shared a fairly significant and secret part of your identity with the people most important to you. As you remembered how you felt in those moments, you couldn’t help but say to Todd what you had needed to hear leading up to your moments of confession.

“Look, Todd, you don’t have to tell me right now if you’re not ready.” you insisted. “But, if you feel like you need to tell me right now, I promise I’ll be totally understanding, unless it’s illegal. I can’t make any promises if it’s illegal”

Todd sighed, a faint smile on his lips as he finally dared to meet your gaze. “Thanks, Y/N. I promise it’s totally legal. Probably. I haven’t looked it up, but I’m guessing it’s legal.” he said. “I want to tell you, and I’ve told plenty of other people before, but with you it feels...different to telling them.”

“Why’s that?” you asked.

“Well, it’s not like I think you’re a totally closed-minded person or anything. I just know that...after I tell you...there’s a small chance you wouldn’t accept it. If that happened, it’d hurt me way more than if anyone else I’ve told before hadn’t accepted me.” Todd explained in a bashful manner.

“I’ve been in your position, if that helps.” you said. “I don’t know what your thing is, but for me, it was coming out as ace. You know what that is, right?”

“You’re...you’re asexual?” Todd said with clear disbelief, his tone of voice otherwise ambiguous.

“Yep.” you responded fairly casually, before you realised that you had just came out to your boyfriend. “I’m sorry for not telling you before. It just never came up, and now I’m just used to telling people when it comes up rather than...going through this whole thing every time. It’s not a problem, is it?”

“A problem? Of course not!” Todd exclaimed, a grin on his face. “It’s-it’s pretty great, actually.”

“Great?” you questioned, brows furrowed. “Why great?”

“Oh, right, yeah.” Todd said, composing himself just enough for him to tell you what had clearly been gnawing at him. “I’m asexual too!” 

You had no idea what your face was doing, but you assumed it reflected the mixture of shock and giddiness that had suddenly started to swirl around in your mind.

You and Abed had been dating for 6 months, though the rest of the study group had only known for 4 months. However, since Troy was pretty much an expert in all things Abed, he’d figured it out within a couple of weeks.

Even after 6 months, not much had changed between you and Abed: you still spent hours watching TV together; you still built pillow forts and blanket forts together; and you still had deep, meaningful conversations with one another on occasion. Your friendship had never really been all that affectionate, save a few hugs and you accidentally falling asleep on his shoulder. Now you were in a relationship, the most you two did beyond the boundary of friendship was hold hands, briefly kiss and peck one another on the cheek and forehead every once and a while. If you were feeling up to it, or if either of you needed one, you’d share a hug, but none of that was all that common in your relationship. Sure, if you were having a movie night or something, you’d rest your legs on Abed’s lap or, if either of you were feeling down, absentmindedly use him as a teddy bear by wrapping your arms around is torso, but that was a fairly rare occurrence.

It didn’t bother either of you, though. 

Neither of you were all that affectionate anyway, and neither of you really felt as though you needed to prove your love for one another via affection. Of course, your friends, though supportive and happy for the both of you and accepting of your sexualities, viewed your relationship as pretty unconventional. Since you both acted so comfortable around one another, your relationship, on the surface, seemed to lack any true passion for one another. However, anyone who truly understood your bond with Abed would be able to see that your and Abed’s passion and caring was shown in unconventional ways. Abed had memorised so much about you and, though often inadvertently, showed off his knowledge of you at the most random of times. It wasn’t to prove anything to you or anyone else, but the small smile on your face when he could recall some inane fact about you was always nice. On the other hand, you would spend hours watching movies and TV shows (even ones you’d never heard of) with Abed to make him happy.

Although you were both happy with your relationship, something had made Abed doubt your entire relationship and, most importantly, your satisfaction with it. 

He could hardly remember how it’d started other than the fact that he had been sat with Jeff and Pierce in the cafeteria, though he could recall Jeff making a dry joke about your relationship, once Abed had finished a monotonous rant about why it was terrible that Disney was making a sequel to Star Wars.

“Haven’t you vented enough about this to Y/N?” Jeff asked in an exasperated tone. He loved Abed; the pair had been close friends for years. However, there was only so much ranting about Star Wars he could take. Besides, he wasn’t dating Abed; surely his partner would’ve been more willing to listen to him lamenting, especially since you were obliged as Abed’s romantic partner to at least pretend to care about the stupid things he cared about? “Can’t you get it out of your system with them?”

“They’re...asexuals or whatever they call themselves. They don’t get anything out of their systems.” Pierce commented. “They were probably sick of him before this Space Wars thing.”

“Why would Y/N be sick of me?” Abed asked, voice still level.

“Pierce, shut up.” Jeff said, shooting Pierce a glare.

“You guys don’t have sex; that’s usually us normal people’s incentive to stay in a relationship, even if we’re miserable.” Pierce explained. “What do they get out of being in a relationship with you?”

Abed was so deep in thought that he was in a near-catatonic state. His mind was racing. Of course, he got a lot out of the relationship; he loved you, after all, and he felt loved by you. But, what did you get out of it? Neither of you were all that affectionate, but you were often the most affectionate out of the pair of you. Did you know that he loved you, or that he even remotely cared about you? Or, did you only stay because you didn’t want to hurt him? How could he be sure that you actually got anything out of the relationship?

“Pierce! You’re such a dick!” Jeff practically hissed, slapping Pierce’s arm with the back of his hand. “Why’d you say that?”

Pierce put his hands up in a defensive manner. “Alright, Seacrest; no need to get your panties in a bunch. The kid needed to hear it sooner or later.” He stood up and walked away, as if he didn’t understand that he’d done anything wrong.

Abed remained fixed in his thoughts for a while after that, just sat in the cafeteria as the world passed him by. He hadn’t noticed Jeff leave, nor had he felt the gentle pat on his shoulder as he left. It took you sitting opposite him for him to realise that it was time to go home.

“Abed? I’ve been waiting on the lawn for a half hour. What’s going on?” you questioned, your voice penetrating his mind. Jeff had told you that Abed had been in here since lunch, but thought Abed should tell you what had happened himself. 

“Nothing. I’m fine.” Abed answered bluntly, though it didn’t sound rude nor hurtful.

You nodded, formulating a response in your mind.

“We need to go so that the night janitor doesn’t chase us out again...” you explained, before pausing. You examined his face; he didn’t make eye contact with you, eyes fixed on his lap. “Do you want me to just give you a ride home? You don’t have to stay at my place if you need to be alone.” you added, understanding that something was wrong, but he wasn’t quite ready to talk about it. You knew better than to pry into what was troubling him, so decided to wait until he brought it up himself.

“No; it’s fine. I’ll stay at your place.” Abed answered in his usual monotone voice, though there was a hint of heart-breaking melancholy you could hear.

“Okay. Ready to go?” you said a little hesitantly, mustering a small, reassuring smile in an attempt to comfort both him and yourself. You had no idea what the hell you were doing, but if you pretended like you did, maybe Abed would be able to tell you what was wrong.

Abed nodded. You both stood up and walked towards the entrance to the cafeteria. You felt something warm and soft in your hand, and looked down to see Abed interlacing his fingers with yours.

“That’s odd.” you thought to yourself. You and Abed had held hands before, but it wasn’t as often as one might have thought. However, you knew better than to question Abed right now. Gently, you grazed your thumb over his knuckles in a soothing manner.

The drive back to your apartment was completely silent. Though Abed was often a quiet man, this silence was a little unnerving. Of course, you’d never force him to talk to you if he needed to just think in silence; that didn’t mean that you weren’t concerned about him.

As you arrived home, you unbuckled your seatbelt, but, before you could look over at Abed, he had leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. It’s not like you minded the sign of affection, but such a change in behaviour was pretty jarring and beyond worrying, considering how you’d found him in the cafeteria.

The abrupt contact flustered you, but you decided to appear unfazed. “So...you want me to order some pizza?” you asked as you both got out of the car.

“Sure.” Abed answered, albeit with his usual level of enthusiasm.

For the rest of the night, you observed Abed’s odd behaviour, attempting to figure out what could have brought upon this sudden wave of affection. He’d hooked his arm around your waist when you were eating your pizza and watching a rerun of How I Met Your Mother, and offered you kisses on the cheek when you returned from the kitchen or bathroom.

It wasn’t like you didn’t appreciate the affection. You quite liked when Abed was affectionate. However, you were perfectly fine when Abed didn’t shower you with signs of love. These levels of affection, especially for one evening, were unusual, and you knew that, at some point, you’d have to try and figure out what was going on with Abed. Any drastic change in Abed’s behaviour could probably be attributed to a bad experience he’d had, and, eventually, he’d end up breaking. You just needed to know what was wrong so you could talk through the problem and ease the pain of the breakdown just a little.

However, you had spent so long trying to figure out how to talk to him about what was going on that, before you knew it, you were tugging on your pyjamas and shuffling into bed beside Abed, who was lying on his back and staring at the dimly-lit ceiling, which was weakly illuminated by your bedside lamp.

As Abed glanced over at you, clearly about to move to either hug you or peck you on the cheek, you decided to talk.

“Hey...um...Abed...if you wanna talk about what’s been bothering you, we can talk now- if you want. You don’t have to.” you practically stammered out.

“I’m fine.” Abed insisted, though you knew him well enough not to believe him.

“Abed, I know you’re not fine. I want to know what’s wrong so I can help you...but...I don’t want to force you to tell-”

“Are you happy with me?”

The question caught you off guard. It simultaneously shattered your heart and puzzled you.

“Huh?” you asked with knitted brows. “What would give you the impression that I’m not happy with you?”

“Pierce said-”

“Pierce is a dick.” you instantly cut him off. “Whatever he said isn’t true, okay?” You paused. “...What did he say?”

“He said that, since we don’t have sex, you don’t have any reason to stay with me and that you don’t get anything out of being in a relationship with me.” Abed said in his usual monotonous voice, but the hint of melancholy was prominent. You glanced over at him, then fixed your eyes on the wall in front of you.

“Abed, I love you, and I know you love me too.” you explained. “You understand me better than I understand myself...and you’re always there for me no matter what. When I’m sad...you don’t try to get me to talk when I’m not ready...you just sit and watch a movie with me...and that’s what I need. You’re what I need. Even if I could change that, I wouldn’t because you make me happier than anyone ever has before.”

You glanced over at him. He was looking up at you with his usual resting face. However, you could see a hint of joy in his eyes, and that caused you to smile. You shuffled so that you were lying down and pecked Abed on the cheek. He smiled faintly and you wrapped your arms around his torso. You rested your head on his chest and you two lay there quietly, his eyes fixed on the ceiling and yours closed. As sleep overcame you, Abed gently planted a kiss on the top of your head, and a childlike grin spread across your tired face.