#they're valid

but knowing that if you'll ever be in a relationship with someone (because relationships don't necessarily mean love and sex, but also trust and understanding) you'll be forever seen as a liar and people will diminish your identity's value

I'm tired of seeing stuff like "If you wouldn't date [insert type of person] you're prejudice toward those people."

Could it be true that you're prejudice toward those people? Yes

However, saying that being open to dating someone regardless of their [transness/sexuality/race/etc.] is the gold standard for anti-prejudice, is arophobic.

This post isn't saying be racist, sexist, trasphobic, queerphobic, ableist or any thing like that. What this post is saying is stop using "I would date [insert minority] therefore I'm not prejudice against them" as the standard.

Would I date a Black disabled trans woman? No

Is it because I hate Black people, disabled people, trans people, or women? No

I wouldn't date a Black disabled trans woman because I wouldn't date anyone, because I'm aro.

Hi, nonnie. I’m glad you felt comfortable sharing your thoughts and venting to me. I get what you’re feeling, it happens to me too from time to time. When you start doing something and sharing it with others who have the same passion, the urge to compare to others is really strong.

I could stay here and tell you all the theory you already know but the truth is, to some extent, we have to accept that life isn’t flat, it’s a rollercoaster. Some day you’ll love your ideas and what you’re writing, some others you’ll hate it. 

Be gentle to yourself. Remember that most of the times when you’re hating the product of your efforts thinking that it’s not as good as other ‘better writers’ you’ve done better than you think. What does this mean? Well. I like ambition. I’m all for ambition and trying to always better ourselves, BUT. 

Be kind and respectful of your time and your abilities. Don’t set absurd goals. Don’t set goals based on other people’s abilities. Don’t forget you can and you have to make mistakes from time to time. Don’t punish yourself when you’re not writing at your best.

Remember that we’re the worst judges of ourselves; your view on yourself and your abilities are often biased for a number of reasons. It’s great, so great that there are so many writers so GOOD you want to cry your soul out! Don’t take that as a goal you want to reach for yourself: that’s their story, their skill. Find your own. Take what makes you the writer you are and try to always improve that part of your works, not what you think your works should be. 

Try to find inspiration by the great writers out there, to take their great writing as inspiration for your own, their efforts as an inspiration to start your own works. When you read a great book, don’t think “Ugh, I’ll never be this good.” But think, “If they did it, I can do it too.” 

That’s the truth, after all. They’re not inhuman, aliens, or people from outer space, they’re just like me and you. It’s hard, probably the hardest thing I can think of, but we have to remind to set goals according to ourselves, not others. Usually that’s why we aren’t proud of our works: we’re being unfair towards ourselves and our abilities.