#table talks

I'm table and

even if ldshadowlady doesn't win I'M NOT FUKCING GOING TO TAKE IT LYING DOWN. So. Should you submit to me any evidence that you voted for her,

I'll paint whichever character you want (doesn't have to be mcyt even, bonus points if it's lizzie) in whatever outfit you want (there is no amount of frill I'm unwilling to draw). (should you have a more compelling idea, I can be convinced)

It will probably even take less than a day for me to paint it bc I'm locked in like that.

Here's some examples of my ability to play dressup!!! I can do that for your fav.

TW: SA, Abuse

Hey everyone. I know I’ve been on an impromptu hiatus, and I apologize for that. This post is very out of the blue, so please ignore any rambling or inconsistencies.

I just want to clarify before people start panicking that I’m not planning on quitting or anything. I still love writing, but that’s not what this post is about.

Around eight hours ago, I found out that Gianni Matragrano, the VA for Sebastian, was stepping down. In that post he included a document made by NoLongerNull, a previous music composer for the game.

The document details her experience with Zeal, and how he sexually assaulted her. You can find Gianni’s post and the document on his stream channel ‘GetGianni’.

I’m not going to say much here. It’s not my place to act righteous or pretend like I’m part of the situation. I’m not. My heart goes out to Ren and her friends and family, it genuinely disgusts me to know that I’ve been supporting a rapist all this time.

It’s…tiring to see everything I love crumble like this without fail. First it was AF2, then Forsaken, then Stars Align, Grace, and now Pressure.

I’m going to be honest, this post is more of a vent than anything else. It’s so exhausting to know something you love is tainted by cruelty.

I’ve had it happen so many times, and I can feel myself almost growing numb towards it. I don’t want to be apathetic. I don’t want to be indifferent.

But seeing everything you know fall apart over and over will make you numb, and apathetic.

Maybe I’m being dramatic. Maybe I’m being childish. But I’ve always found solace in media. It was escapism, especially when life around me felt impossible to live in. Media and games like these carried me through some of the hardest points in my life, so I feel my pain is at least a little justified.

Having this happen over and over again has admittedly sapped a lot of my motivation to create at all. I was so excited to write Operative 15—I’ve fallen in love with the characters I’ve written and I want to write more, but even the idea of associating with Pressure—or the person behind it—even if indirectly, makes my stomach turn.

I want to continue the story, I really do, but I don’t know if I can. Even if I took the narrative in my own direction, it feels wrong, like I can never truly separate the story from its source.

I guess what I’m saying is that I don’t think I can bring myself to continue Operative-15. It breaks my heart to say, but I just can’t. Not when I know who I’m supporting if I do.

I’m sorry for this sob-fest of a post. I’ve been off my meds for several days now and it’s causing me to spiral. I guess this was just the icing on the cake.

Please don’t worry about me, though. I have a loving family and an amazing network of friends to support me. I’ve just had a lot of emotions bottled up with nowhere to dump them, so I’m putting them on a screen in hopes that it’ll help.

Bottom line is, Operative-15 is cancelled, Zeal and the dev team are fucking disgusting, and I hope Ren gets the support and help she deserves.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, I’m sorry if it’s out of character. I don’t know how much longer I’ll be inactive, but I need some time to rest.

Take it easy out there,

“But how we begin to generate, from matter, the pictures in our brain?”  A.Damasio

Mental Matter is a set of objects intended to be used by people around a table, in order to support a dialogue at it’s visual and tactile aspect, or the level of abstraction. 

Each item is able to serve functions of dining or drinking. Each composition of items is able to interpret a meaning that emerges into the discussion, when words fail to describe it.

describing a space that we visited. actions performed in such space. an accident with our bike. an abstract concept. or the way a process is running

work in progress / Supervised by Prof. Barbara Schmidt, Kunsthochshule Berlin Weissensee 2019

Oh my god you’re spoiling me…what did I do to deserve these masterpieces…

Fr though—THIS IS TOO CUTE OMG

Also I heard we're sending you pictures of our cats ^^

(don't be fooled she will bite your toes)

A fine specimen...very round

So I decided to take it a step further and show off some designs I have for each of the MCs. Keep in mind though that none of these designs are canon! They're just my interpretation of the characters :]

First off we have the MC from ALONE. Their name is Ennui, but it's often shortened to Enn.

Then we have the MC from I (heart) You, which is actually just an alternate version of the ALONE MC.

Of course we have the OBSERVER MC, who's name is Fen. There's no real meaning behind the name lol, I just thought it sounded nice.

And last but certainly not least, we have the OPERATIVE-15 MC, Melony!

Unfortunately none of these names really have a deeper meaning, except Ennui, which is the feeling of boredom/listlessness that you feel when there's nothing to do.