#semicorrect quotes

GOD OF THE FAEWILDES

(aka... the Existential of Magic)

God: “Ah, yes, I've heard of the issue you common folk of 'the Real World' often have when you meet me.”

God: “You're unable to truly gaze upon me; I appear distorted, or elongated, or 'just plain wrong'.”

God: (cheerfully) “Well, I have news for you: it's not just that your eyes are deceiving you!” [tilts their head to the side, fluttering their hand in circles dramatically and rolling their eyes behind their mask] “Or, well, yes, it seems you 'Real folk' see me differently, but—”

God: [warps their mask to open up the bottom half of their face and flash their sharp-toothed grin. At the same time, bends in half to stop their face barely an inch away from the person they're talking to—even magically blocking the other from moving if they attempt to]

God: (deviously and cheerfully) “—point is... it's not that I'm not 'wrong', or 'gross', or 'deceptively-shaped'. I am all of those things—very inhuman and disturbing, if I do say so myself!”

God: [sighs overdramatically, jerkily unfurling to stand up straight, bringing their hands together, and reforming their mask as they instead pace circles around the person]

God: (ominously and amusedly) “No, it just comes down to a sad fact: that I am apparently so great—so mythical and magical—that you all are just incapable of seeing me As I Truly Am.”

God: [flips on their heel to face them head-on; a devious grin hidden underneath their mask]

God: (suspensefully) “In other words...”

God: [takes slow yet long, dramatic steps toward them, once again magically stopping them from escaping if they attempt to]

God: (likewise drawing out their words, speaking slowly and gleefully) “I believe you have what they used to call in the Old World...”

God: [once again stops to lower their face to barely an inch away from the other person's. Clears the bottom half of their mask to show a wide, ominous smile with FAR too large and sharp teeth]

God: (overdramatically finishes) “A skill issue.”

Istg, God REALLY needs to learn how to get to the point... 🤣😭

Jaime: It wasn't so simple. I was sleeping with my sister, and you had one friend in the world - who was sleeping with his sister.

Tyrion: I was speaking in relative terms.

HIDDEN WIP

Veritheya: (mournfully) “On that day, 500 years ago, I lost my sweetest daughter, Eve, to those savage, heartless faeries...”

Achilles: (from afar) “QUIT TELLING EVERYONE I'M DEAD!”

Veritheya: “Sometimes... I almost think I hear her voice.”

Achilles: “AND STOP CALLING ME A FUCKING WOMAN!”

Veritheya: (slightly more aggressively and pointedly) “Then I realize there's no way she'd say any of those things, and that she never sounded anything like that, anyway.”

Achilles: (irritably, to himself) “And this bitch wonders why I disowned her and sold my soul to {Magic} for safekeeping.”

Marri: (aghast) “Wait, she does?”

Achilles: (exasperatedly) “Yep. SOMEHOW!”

Veritheya: (a bit more loudly) “And that, my flock, is why you can never trust the fae, or fae-touched.”

Achilles: (under his breath) “Seriously, I don't know how so few people see through that garbage...”

CHARACTERS: - Sammy Bardales - Victor Salles

TIMELINE:

approx. 800 AA (global timeline)

(due to the Faewildes' space-time distortions, timelines across countries are neither linear nor consistent)

Sammy: [suddenly has plants reacting to his emotions; they blossom when he's happy, cling to people he doesn't want to leave, and spike up when he gets scared or angry]

Sammy: [meets Victor, the relative his magic is from—]

Sammy: [throws his hands up in anger; the plants growing on and all around him spike and jut outward]

Sammy: (irritably) "PEOPLE KNOW WHEN I'M ANGRY NOW BECAUSE OF YOU!" DDDDD:<

Victor: [gives a pitying grin]

Victor: (voice awkward, yet amused) "oh, you didn't have that problem before?"

Sammy: [huffs, crossing his arms and looking away]

Sammy: (annoyedly) "I don't know; my magic was too weak or something? And Caron said I was 'too depressed' or some shit."

Victor:

Victor: [goes quiet, a subtle tension twisting his face and eyes turning sad. At the same time, the very world around them seems to lose a bit of life]

Victor: [brow furrowed in concern, gently) "... did plants die around you when you weren't growing them?"

Sammy: ...

Sammy: <.<

Victor: [brb, going to try to kill a goddess for a second time... after he'd long-since accepted the first as the greatest mistake of his life]