#satorukin

My canonmates are correct, and I'm a big dummy. I was wrong, and Shoko was right all along :( but I'm still sexy for it.

(#♾️☄️⬇️)

The Cursed Spirit we were up against strained us both to exhaustion. I recall the dust and scrape of my shoes when I slid down the crater we caused (yes, we forgot to put up a barrier then, too). Satoru was trying hard not to look tired, he wanted to mask the fact that he was even breathing hard... But I think he saw my state. I remember him pausing before he could start whatever deflective, witty quip he'd had in mind. I think we both realized that one of us would have died if we didn't have the other there.

I told him that- in some handful of words. I wish I could describe the way his expression shifted when I actually thanked him for having my back. I thought nothing of it when I offered him my hand to help him stand or when I didn't feel his Infinity when he accepted it.

It actually took a few weeks for me to notice that Satoru would completely lower his Infinity around me after that. Well, unless it was used to intentionally annoy the hell out of me.

I still wonder what Satoru was thinking when I'd helped him out of the crater... Until we find him in this life, I'll simply have to speculate.

- Suguru (#🎐🌿🐉)

Ps; When we got back to Jujutsu High, both Yaga-sensei and Shoko were extremely startled by how ragged we looked. Satoru and I both listed off impossible reasons why we were so beat up "we were hit by a car" "mugged by the Yakuza" "intense stomach ache" "saved an entire convent of nuns" "spontaneous riot".

I love you. I love you. I love you so much it hurts. I wish you were here with me. I wish we could meet again. I wish we could have talked things out properly. I love you. I wish you'd come to me when it had started getting bad. I wish you'd talked to me. I wish I'd told you the truth. I love you. Timelines later, and I still dream about you. It feels like someone is squeezing my heart when they try to comprehend what we had and water it down into some stupid fanfiction. We were real people. Real lives. Real love. I dont know if you felt the same, but you were more than just a best friend to me, you were my everything. My soulmate. I wish you were here. Sometimes versions of you like my posts, but I don't reach out. I Dont think I should. I dont know how to be normal about us. About you and me and how everything went down. The years and countless missions and stupid sleepovers in the dorms and sitting with you whilst you smoked in the grass. I'm nothing like the man i was back then. I'm weak, I'm frail. I'm not the strongest, no where near.my heart aches. I miss you. I dont know how to cope you. I love you so much. I wish I'd said it sooner. I thought we had more time. It was always that I'd do it after this hangout, that I didn't want to ruin the moment. And then I'd chicken out. Over and over and over until it was too late. I'm sorry.

your friend, satoru

#🤨💢👾👁

Happy birthday, Suguru. I love you to the moon and back. I hope you have a day just as wonderful as you are.

-Satoru

- satoru

I regret that I didn't pay more attention to Suguru's emotions or showed that I cared about him before it was too late. I wish he'd reached out, but I know things were hard and I don't blame him. I only blame myself for not giving him the support he so clearly needed and I hate that I didn't see what was in plain sight. I had the fucking Six Eyes, how could I not have noticed??

I wonder how things would have changed if we had a long heart to heart conversation about our feelings (both for each other and the world) and the future. I'm sorry that I didn't see you were suffering, Suguru. I blame myself for it every time I remember. You didn't deserve anything that happened to you, or us. I love you.

-Satoru

happy birthday suguru !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hahahaha. id do anything to pull an all nighter in your room, our limbs tangled together as we played games until midnight. when the alarm rang on my flip phone, shoko and i would run to get the cake we snuck out and bought (the ones we tried to make all failed, haha, but dont worry ! shoko made sure i didnt buy those disgustingly sweet cakes!!). we’d sing you a song, i think, and make you close your eyes for a wish before letting you blow out the candles. youd cut each of us a slice, and i would devour the leftovers. in the morning, if i can wake up that early, we’d take you for soba, then wander in the city!! i like the way they turn to look at us when we march in a row…

i only really celebrated two of your birthdays with you. but, really, every year on this date, for the 10 years after and then some, i’d eat some soba, and buy a cake. sometimes i shared with shoko. if i could see you now, i think id bring you to a theme park. i want to hear your crisp laughter on the rollercoasters. hng.. stay safe, suguru. and happy birthday. have a wonderful day. know that im thinking of you!

ah hello. happy christmas eve.

first of all, to everyone. im sorry. i was a god and i knew your hopes were banked on me. im sorry for betraying all your effort to rescue me, for wasting these valuable assets. for abandoning my responsibility. for being so carefree during the fight. if id been thinking of you all, and that fucked up society, rather than my own enjoyment, maybe i wouldve seen sukuna coming. im sorry for leaving you a giant mess to clean up (twice!) when i was born with the potential for change. and im sorry, that you had to see someone youd looked up to, die in such a horrifyingly short moment. i cant begin to imagine the amount of terror that single scene mustve carved into you. but you all are strong. and im positive you can do it. trust!

almost my entire will is dedicated to the school and you all (that is, if my family doesnt come stealing). after all this, go get yourself something nice, eh? i think you allllll deserve it!! oh and! dont come see me anytime soon!!!!! but if you visit, bring me some sweets and cake! its winter, they wont go bad. set them beside my headstone, will you?

and to my one and only. suguru.

happy xmas eve! ive heard of homoerotic fights, maybe we should spar on this romantic day? haha. isnt it funny we have the same death anniversary? the universe aligned to make this happen! see? soulmates for real…

…im sorry. i think you deserved it! but im terribly sorry. watching you go cold in my arms was filled with panic and tears. but not regret. im not sure what im trying to get at here, or what i feel exactly. you had your reasons, i had mine. but despite everything, i still love you! i think thats significant! in source i get to spend every christmas eve forever with you. but /i/ didnt get that afterlife segment. in this world i miss you more than anything. it hurts a lot! to not know if youre here or not — very much different from our ten years apart. i was keeping an eye on you then, but i dont have enough eyes now (haha). wherever you are, stay safe! know that i love you! though im sure you didnt need reminding.

yours, satoru. #🌌🌊