#rkfeb16eval

However, as Jihoon was waiting at the room where his evaluation was going to take. It had been a very stranger last week, with his current dancing state, he had been very cautious of what he would actually do on his feet. He did feel out of his comfort zone when he had to just stand awkwardly in one spot and just sing. It didn't come so natural to him like when it came to dancing.

Before he knew it, his turn came and he rather limped his way through the door. He could finally show that he could sing, nicely, maybe not as good as his dancing was, but for him, it sounded good enough. As he walked in, he quickly grabbed a microphone before getting into place. He had known he dance to the whole song, ever since it came out so many years ago, but the fact that he could only have one minute of it, made him have a very hard choice on what exactly he wanted to show. He had to cut all the bits he knew, and just focus on the one minute, repeating it over a million times in the past month, he had to know it to perfection. Eventually, he stopped himself when the breakdown came, where he could dance. It was less than thirty seconds, with singing before and after, so he had managed to show two of his somewhat talents. After all, his flip had failed for the past week, he could just keep it safe for the evaluations.

Before he knew it, the music had started playing and he brought the mic to his lips. He began singing as soon as he heard the right beat.

거기 다쳐 멀리 비켜 다쳐 때로는 용감해서 문제지 외쳐 구해달라 외쳐 아니면 지금부터 너 잘 봐

He really did felt uncomfortable with standing still and singing with all the passion he could collect at the moment. As soon as the part finished, he got ready for the dancing. It felt more like his place, it felt really nice to be able to move. The choreography was simple, but with the right amount and accuracy, power and control, they looked stunning. He was glad he didn't have to move a lot on his feet, however, he managed to hit himself a few times with the microphone, he really needed to practice more with it, that would have left bruises, he was sure about it.

Eventually, the electro music stopped and he inhaled deeply, the next set of lyrics following.

뭘 믿고 이러냐 혀를 차 뭘 보고 배웠기에 기가 차 뉴스는 똑같아 나이만 좀 달라 우리가 왜 이런지 몰라

With some force, he managed to hit the note. It wasn't too high for his voice, nor too long, it was pretty good for the amount of knowledge he had in singing. A small smile spread across his lips as he paced from one leg to another pretty soon, waiting for the cut note in the background to stop playing before he went into the chorus.

터져 나오는 Jackpot 누가 뭐라 건 so what

so as her eyes rise to meet the lens of the camera before her does the radiant smile fade. the purse of red an entrance to a new dimension, an alternate reality where jihyun lee was not, and being who she was wouldn’t cut it.

she stands, frozen upon sight -- the first words that spill from her lips are foreign; they feel strange when paired with the soft tone of voice and the lack of grins. crestfallen, she feels. hopelessness she personifies. 

“i’m lee jihyun, and i’m going to be acting out a scene from the musical, moulin rouge.” 

a deep breath, a shallow reminder of the heart that beats heavily; rhythmically singing its own song of alarm to her. fingers bunch up the ends of her shirt, white bleeding into white -- the show must go on.

“everyday i’m loving you -- more and more.”

it’s there, the frightening sight of just how vulnerable she feels. the run of fingers through blonde tendrils show the shake in her fingertips. the desire to be forgiven, the absolute desperation that is seen through the sparkle of irises. the glimpse of the broken-hearted spelled out in russet hues. 

“listen to my heart,” she feels the depth find itself in her voice. the ringing of her timbre, the clearness is undefined; the raw tone that spills is unheard of -- a resignation of talent, and a beginning of drawing one’s energy from her guiding companion; her heart. “can you hear it sing?”

“come back to me, and forgive everything --” she gasps, the frigid pull of the fingers against her chest, grasping at the sullen emptiness that is drawn, tugging at her heart. the breathlessness that suffocates the lungs, brings a terrible heaviness to her. 

the raise of the eyes reveal the tears bound to them, “seasons may change, winter to spring.”

lashes flutter, dancing against rosy cheeks, closing as the coolness of that sole drop rushes downward; clinging to the jaw, until it parts, kissing the ground as it falls. sweaty palms speak unspoken desires. falling, falling, she thinks, falling terribly far from reality. into a distant fantasty, smothered with the familiar fear of loneliness that consumes her.

that makes her stay in character.

she pauses. the trembling of lips, the flicker of irises call for the awareness of the camera; her soul deeply stripped bare. 

she falls just below a whisper, and in the alcove of silence, does she feel bared, finally awakened to her deepest, most hidden fear. “i love you,”

a shakiness begins, it steals the very air from her being and has her locked out of the smallest sense of security she was finally being deprived of. with no choice in the matter; left vulnerable and forced to face the truth. 

“’til the end of time.”

if it’s the area he’s most comfortable with, he had no second thoughts. for as long as he could remember, just being in the dance studio calmed him. the process was almost the same every time. he spent a long time picking the song, experimenting with different beats and tunes. he started with freestyle, solidified his moves, approaching it almost as a science. and once he had a minute of routine, then he would loosen up, run through it once, twice, take a break and work on everything else and choreography from lessons and training, before coming back to it so it wouldn’t tire too fast.

a flexible perfectionist is what he’d like to see himself as.

everything is easier, when he has to think of nothing else but catching the beat, but moving like he always does. he keeps it moving, and keeps his mind blank to make space for nothing but the music and the lyrics, letting it echo and fill up the hollowness left behind by suppressing his thoughts. it’s not calculated and it’s not exact, he just stays in the studio during independent study and after schedules end, and moves and glides until there’s a bittersweet ache in his muscles, and his hair is drenched with his sweat.

he breathes heavy, eyes cast down, and he keeps going to banish all thoughts of staying in the same place, of never improving, of never getting anywhere further than where he’d started out.

because she knows he’d tell her that if she’s not having fun or enjoying it, why should she continue? so she thinks of what she can really do best and the honest answer is to laugh. smile. be happy because she truly is for once. 

even with the doubts, she’s happy lately and if that can’t show in her singing, then what is she singing for? the contract offer couldn’t come with better timing and yet she had dreaded it from the moment she stepped into kt that day. if not for it, she wouldn’t have thought of such a song — because once she signs that contract, her life isn’t tied down for two years, it’s beginning again on a new leaf and two years from now, she can only hope that she’s accomplished even as much as she has in the past two years. 

it’s just like those spare moments with leo, how many people can see they’ve done the same? so it’s time for her to allow that happiness to resonate in her training. 

her problem was holding onto the past, in so many more ways than one. 

» start! 00:51 to 1:45 

the decision is easy but the process itself is tricky, she knows. there’s no knowing if she can pull it off properly but she’s at least got to try. one minute challenges, it’s like filming for youtube, right? wrong — because those challenges were never quite up her alley and technology outside of her cell phone has never been her best friend. 

it’s the wrong disney movie, she can almost hear leo’s voice as she waits outside the room to film but tangled is just as lovable if you ask her. there’s no frying pan in her hand but a fake file of contract papers, her own personal joke. risky is the best way to put it, but she’s practiced over and over until the day before because disney sundays with baby lion are a tradition she doesn’t skip out on and burning out is exactly why she let go of the name shooting star. because stars burn out and she refuses. no, the beginning is with a colorful laugh. 

   just smell the grass, the dirt    just like i’d dream they’d be    just feel that summer breeze    the way it’s calling me 🎶

there’s not a lot of room, she expects that but it doesn’t stop her from being as jubilant as rapunzel was, because the happiness of freedom is genuine. because the stigma she allowed her kt contract to hold is gone. 

making a curtsy towards the camera, she disappears from the frame for a couple of seconds to play her music. quick footsteps can be heard as willow proceeds to spread herself on the floor ( as if she didn't style her hair and wore a skirt at all ), petite frame curving slightly inward.

"come together, everyone gather here..."

the voice of bigstar's leader fills the room with arguably their most successful track as a group by far. willow punctuates every line with a rhythmic flinch, imitating a fish taken out of water. "we gon' party like, lilili lalala..." a few more seconds and willow slowly rouses from her position, mouthing the lyrics in a theatrical lip-sync and completely leaving the fish for the next animal in her list. the girl stiffens in her upright stance before she assumes the gait of a penguin: she waddles from side to side, following the beat of the song with arms flapping violently.

a few more animal imitations complete the rest of the verse -- ostrich, snake, and even a crayfish. when feeldog's voice makes way for a melodic na na na na na, the girl displays her best interpretation of a gorilla ( her trademark ) inching towards the camera. she leans her face a little more to the device before whispering--

wow, fantastic baby.>

the catchy hook becomes a complete mess of willow unleashing the craziest of imitations; for the first few beats she lowers to the ground, springing up like a frog in its natural habitat and then giving life to the long-limbed giraffe stiffly hopping around the room. dance, bigstar says, and of course willow follows the instruction, enthusiastically bouncing and running about to the tune. she's not sure what her coaches would think of a trainee making a total idiot ( a comedic idiot at least ) out of herself, but willow is not one to stop halfway -- she's going to be an animal from start down to the last second of the video as planned.

the brunette crouches over as a camel when a deep-voiced repetition of boom shakalaka blares through the music player. she then takes steps beat by beat while on the position all in her humped-back glory, and covers the last seconds of the video by making a last close-up for the camera, her tongue sticking out to the side as a camel would, and then whispers for the last time.