𝖎 𝖑𝖎𝖐𝖊 𝖞𝖔𝖚

hey peeps! 

even though the last time they met was awkward and more than a little confusing, he still wants to bite the bullet and try to have a better conversation this time.  maybe changkyun was just out of it that day, or maybe he was just overthinking everything.  because even though changkyun hasn’t really outright said what his feelings were or if he was upset, it’s not like hongjoong has taken the first step either.  maybe they’re just in limbo.

so although hongjoong still has some unresolved feelings about the last time they spoke, he keeps his voice level and chipper in the hopes that things will be better this time.  that things won’t turn around and bite him, or confuse him, or make him wonder what exactly he did wrong in the first place.  it’s stress.  they’re just stressed.

that’s what he keeps telling himself.

it’s a breath of relief that escapes him when changkyun at least sounds better on the phone.  his words don’t bite or feel backhanded like they did before, they don’t drive a knife in his gut and twist.  so the relieved smile that crosses his lips is genuine as he lays back in his bed, keeping the phone tucked to his ear with the pillow that he’s resting on.  “ yeah, but i like that about convex.  you guys have a sound.  like, a signature.”  he explains with a smile upon hearing changkyun’s laugh.  “ it makes you recognizable.  i don’t think that’s a bad thing.”

sometimes, changkyun would forget not everyone is used to his dry humor, to his tone of voice, to his face even. he wasn’t aware that hongjoon would take his words that to heart, and to this day, it tugs at his heartstrings a bit. it was the last thing he wanted to do, upset the other. however, there wasn’t much he could do. he wasn’t the type to change just because people didn’t understand him.

the songs that convex had released so far, especially title tracks, really weren’t changkyun’s cup of tea. he liked more dark, mature concepts. but, with the new young additions to the group he highly doubts he will see any of that anytime soon “really? they don’t seem a tad too bubblegum?” he asks, brow raised as he rolls in his bed with a quiet grunt. his whole body ached, but it wasn’t anything new.

xxx

changkyun has a point, and woohyun’s smile falters to something more accepting, content. he nods his head with a hum. “yeah. i’m hoping not the former, but it’s always on the table.” he says softly. “we’ll see when it comes, and we’ll take it day by day.” we’ll get through it, he wants to say, but he swallows it back. “we should! that sounds like fun. a bonding experience~” he claps his hands together. “we should mention it to the others. set up a night this week. let’s make it a snack party too~” he wiggles his brows, smiling widely.

“we are a funny group, okay?“ changkyun laughs, smile pulling on his lips. with so many members, he was more than aware they were lowkey made for variety shows. he wondered if sphere planned on making them vlog someday. he hoped they did. it would be one hell of a show for the fans and public to see. especially if they have to show how they travel. someone always got lost, and changkyun was more than aware the group lost him 99% of the time.

“it’s fine, seungcheol gets more embarrassing if he’s put on the spot.“ the dancer says, obviously teasing his best friend even if he wasn’t here to hear it. “it’s fine hyung, you can poke fun at me as well.“ he assures the other with a lopsided grin. there was only so much they could say and do on the show. there were so many of them, he was sure a lot would get cut out. “win win indeed.“ changkyun agrees with a nod of his head.

buzzkill. he wishes he could say he’s surprised, but not only is this changkyun he’s talking to, but seungcheol he’s talking about. he pretends he is nonetheless, though, a gasp parting his lips and his eyes widening comically. hand on heart, he sniffles a little, as if wounded, before shaking it off with a quiet but hearty laugh. changkyun won’t entertain his dramatics for long, so there’s no point keeping it up unnecessarily. his further request piques his attention, however. it’s at least work related, but he can’t say he thinks it’s a good idea still. he hates to shoot his best friend down twice in a row, but he’d rather take his pouting than a scolding from their stylists for messing up his hair or getting sweat on his outfit. 

( no more than his usual nervous amount, anyway, though he’s been getting better in front of the camera. it isn’t like this is his first music video shooting, or his second or third. they’ve even recently done those new member teasers, too; he should be comfortable by now and he is getting there — steadily. ) 

“see, you’re at least aiming at the target this time,” he teases, “but I’m afraid it’s a no again. do you know how much I feared for my life when the stylist glared at me for fiddling with my shirt earlier? imagine if I got my hair all windswept or got a crease in my top— you’d be promoting without me.” an exaggeration, but what’s a joke without a little truth behind it? “uh, people with cars, devil. also, I’m surprised I’m not already saved as that. how long have you known me? hey, what’s my contact photo on your phone? it better be flattering.” he mumbles, tiptoeing to see over at the screen. 

conversations like these always lightened changkyun up. knowing that his best friend was aware he was joking and meant no harm, was always good. after all, this was what friends were for. teasing each other, being there for each other. it was nice that seungcheol was okay with all of this. he is sure the staff can hear them quietly being dramatic with one another, but none of them seemed to care. it was like any other photoshoot. they were left to their own accord whenever it wasn’t their turn to film. 

with one more dramatic sigh, changkyun slumped even further into his seat “i am bored.” he states and he knows he sounds dramatic, but this was the first music video they weren’t dancing in. he literally had nothing he was interested in or looking forward to. “you feared for it, i don’t. the cordi-noonas love me!” he says, seriously, but they all know he is joking. he doesn’t want to get yelled at, afterall, he is supposed to set an example when it comes to the new members.”stop calling me devil, i already get call demon by fans i don’t need you to bandwagon on that behaviour!” changkyun says with a huff and runs a hand through his hair. at the question about cheol’s contact photo, the younger raises a brow at him. quickly, he unlocks his phone and goes onto his contact, turning the phone to him.

they were all experienced and in many ways senior to him, jaehyun had barley been a trainee for a year when he got the offer to join convex and now, he was filming a music video with them. it all felt surreal even if he had been with them for two months now, this whole experience felt odd, “a little stressed,” he nodded, it was only a little stressed, not too much because he felt comfortable with the members ( or with most ). the only thing was that he felt like he had been pushed off a plank and straight into the ocean– without time to get used to a new thing, each month had been a new challenge.

“i think its more challenging than stressful? if that makes sense.”

it felt somewhat reassuring hearing the older say he would get used to it– meeting people, for someone like jaehyun who was still adjusting to living with 12 others, meeting new people wasn’t on his bucket list but he understood what the other meant and so he nodded, biting back his bottom lip slightly then it dawned on him, he was a rookie– wasn’t he? even if convex was now going on their senior year, he was a newly debuted idol, so he needed to greet everyone properly, the thought made him wrinkle his nose slightly, “ah– promoting will be a new experience as well,” he nodded, thinking about the schedule that he would have with convex this and next month.

changkyun was proven time and time again that either he was different, emotionless or had an issue with using the correct words. he was always a tad too.. calm about things like these, he doesn’t remember being nervous about them. the most, he was excited, but even that was mild. he always worked hard, put in so many extra hours of dancing after practice, in order to feel comfortable in himself and his skills. he worked hard by himself in order to not have a reason to be worried.