#rest assured

We have a couple of examples to assume that when leaving for the Trojan War, the heads of families left the task of controlling their home and taking care of their wives and children to one or more trusted persons. The reasons for this choice are clearly the protection of the home and those who are part of it (in a society accustomed to continuous raids and enemy attacks, at least one adult male who's able to defend the family is needed in the house) and also the control of the wife's conduct.

This is witnessed in the story of Agamemnon, who entrusts Clytemnestra to a minstrel. So when Aegisthus decides to seduce her, he must first knock out her guardian. And in fact he does so, abandoning him to die on a desert island.

At first Queen Clytemnestra turned a deaf ear to his dishonourable schemes. She was a sensible woman, and besides, she had a minstrel with her, to whom Agamemnon when he left for Troy had given orders to watch over his queen. (Odyssey, book 3, Rieu)

Odysseus entrusts the care and protection of his wife to his friend and companion, Mentor. But what happens is that for some reason that is not explained to us, Mentor is unable to effectively assume this role. We do not know whether it has been like this for twenty years or not, what we do know is that when the suitors arrive, he is not protecting the house. There isn't even the need to knock him out, in fact he is still alive and well at the time the Odyssey is set. He speaks to the assembly, tries to bring the people to go to Telemachus' aid, but he is silenced and ignored.

Laertes is also in no condition to intervene. At the beginning of the Odyssey Penelope still hopes that he could help her, but it comes to nothing.

He shall go straight to Laertes, sit down beside him, and tell him the whole story. Perhaps Laertes may hit upon some scheme and come out of his retreat to appeal to the people, who seem intent on wiping out his and Odysseus' royal line. (Odyssey, book 4, Rieu)

Indeed, we know from Penelope herself that before leaving, Odysseus had asked her to take care of his parents, as she already did. This suggests that even then Laertes was considered unfit for the role of head of the family. And moreover Odysseus had taken his place on the throne at an unspecified time, even though Laertes still had quite a few years ahead of him. Everything suggests that the handover of royal power was peaceful and agreed upon.

So it's clear Mentor is not strong enough, Laertes is not strong enough, Telemachus is just a child... What happens is that Penelope finds herself accounting for her actions only to herself. I would like to emphasize once again just how exceptional this is. As long as Odysseus is in Troy the problem is relative, because he can return in case of need and there is news of him. But after Troy?

Penelope takes responsability for a series of kingly duties. In addition to managing the house:

she tries to intervene in disputes, especially when the suitors prove to be troublemakers

she interacts with her subjects (Eumaeus informs us while talking to Odysseus that this has not happened lately and that they miss it),

she tries to restore the wealth of the house as best as she can, by accepting courting gifts

she welcomes and interrogates strangers and tries to keep their house respectable.

For how are you, stranger, to find out whether I really am more intelligent and resourceful than other women, if I leave you to sit down to meals ragged and dirty in my house? (Odyssey, book 19, Rieu)

Hell, even Odysseus, the first time he talks to her after twenty years, compares her to a king:

"My lady", answered the resourceful Odysseus, "there is not a man in the wide world who could find fault with you. For your fame has reached broad heaven itself, like that of some illustrious king, ruling a populous and mighty country with the fear of the gods in his heart, and upholding justice." (Odyssey, book 19, Rieu)

What we do know is that by the time Telemachus reached full maturity, the role of master and protector of the house and Penelope would fall on him if Odysseus did not return. Telemachus' maturation is a very important theme in the Odyssey and also a source of friction between him and his mother. Although he has yet to gain full control of the house (which in fact he will not get since Odysseus returns at the most critical moment), we can infer from the text that by the time the Odyssey is set, he has the power to send Penelope back to the house of her father, Icarius. Or at least technically he should have it. Penelope tells us that he implores her to leave, so we do not understand whether he could actually send her away if he really wanted to. In any case, whether he has the power or not, he decides not to use it:

It is quite impossible for me to cast out, against her will, the mother who bore me and who brought me up, with my father somewhere at the world's end, perhaps alive, perhaps dead. Think what I would have to pay Icarius if I were to send my mother back to him. [...] And I would incur in the wrath of my countrymen. (Odyssey, book 2, Rieu)

It is also interesting that, despite Icarius urging his daughter to remarry, for some reason he does not have the authority to take her and bring her back to Sparta with him. I maintain that Penelope has an abnormal freedom and control, practically on the brink of "illegality" as conceived by the society of the time.

But how is it possible that she can do it? In my opinion what she does is a studied move: the attempt to take power for herself, using the memory of Odysseus to legitimize it. She must demonstrate that she is not a threat to the pre-established order, but rather that she acts in function of it. That there is no need to worry, because she makes all the decisions on behalf of her husband, not against him. And if she keeps things exactly as they are for twenty years (that is, without a male figure who for the time, I want to stress it, is NECESSARY) it is only for the good of Odysseus. And this is true on her part, I do not think there is malice in her. But let's realize that by serving the purposes of her husband she finds herself doing something that not even Clytemnestra did. That is, GOVERNING COMPLETELY ALONE. Without a man.

But to do that, she has to play it really well. She must always keep the memory of Odysseus alive, she cannot allow anyone to forget who the rightful king is. She talks about him constantly, and has imposed a state of perpetual mourning on herself that does not allow for interruptions.

I just want to point out that I am not arguing that it is all a show or that her feelings towards Odysseus are not true. But my point is it is not just for love, it is also to stay afloat that she does what she does.

An analysis of this kind is obviously not new, it's already very discussed by scholars. Below I cite the main sources that gave me these ideas. Obviously no interpretation is set in stone, so if someone wanted to discuss it I would be absolutely willing.

https://www.jstor.org/stable/44578485?read-now=1&seq=2#page_scan_tab_contents

https://www.jstor.org/stable/26308152?read-now=1&seq=1#page_scan_tab_contents

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yet again, shoutout to @syrooo for this super detailed template

everyone wants to know about the muscle in my little oc group, so here you go! not going to give much context for any of this--it's tempting, but i like a little mystery now and then (very rarely, clearly)

(for the notes section i went w/ his character tropes & then his associations, and then the amortentia is what you'd smell if you liked him)

do we fw tomtord still