seen from Netherlands
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If we cannot name and accept our own attachment needs, sending clear messages to others when those needs are 'hot' is impossible. Ambiguous messages are what keep the polka protest going. It is much easier to say, 'Why aren't you more talkative? Don't you have anything to say to me?' than to open up and ask that our need for loving connection be met.
Dr. Sue Johnson in Hold Me Tight (84)
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Figuring out whether to stay in a relationship or not is no easy task when things are seemingly going well, yet if you are completely honest with yourself, you know something is missing. I came across this note given to me over 15 years ago (had tucked it away in a relationship book I was reading at the time). At the time I was choosing to risk being alone again, which is unsettling for most. I actually ended this relationship after pondering my needs as an individual; the next guy I met was whom I married. What was missing at the time was the need to fully love myself. Without self-love, how could I possibly love someone else? Being single does provide perspective to truly get to know yourself and love yourself. My friend was correct in reminding me to not get set in my ways because I knew I wanted to love another person, but not without loving me first. Homework: Do you fully love yourself? If not, do the self-work. #fridaynotes #relationships #relationshipneeds #shouldistayorshouldigo #honestreflection #letterfromafriend #reminder #selfhonesty #truth #betteroffalone #singlelife #gainperspective #knowyourself #selfwork #selflove #beforelovingsomeoneelse #loveyourselffirst https://www.instagram.com/p/CPtAyb0JWaE/?utm_medium=tumblr
patience. respect. consistency. honesty and loyalty. and a whole lot of passion.
