#queenslove

IMAGINE BEING LOVED AS QUEEN.

After the sting of toxic relationships, you wonder if the good guys are out there. They are. You just have to become aligned to match their good energy. You see, everything is like a magnet….attracting or repelling. So what is rumbling inside attracts it’s equal or opposite partner.

This is what I mean…. If you are holding fear (perhaps of being alone) you are a delicious magnet for The Narcissist. If you carry guilt, you draw in The Punisher. If you hold anger, you draw in The Brutaliser. You see everything is energy. So you were in alignment with the rotten relationship because that’s all you felt you deserved (back then).

When your self confidence and self love are low, it’s like a beacon flashing ‘Come hither, I am ready to give you all I have because you make me feel better (at the beginning anyway)’. Or perhaps you were in a great space when you first met but over time you over-gave and they abused and drained your energy (the curse of the empath).

Congratulations for making the big step out of these painful relationships … So now what? Now darling, you learn to love you. Now you are wondering what good love looks like for the Woman who loves herself.

Here’s a sneak peek to get you excited…. Imagine having no stress about being perfect…. Even when you’re eating, sleeping, snoring, drooling, and the rest! Being dressed up or lounging around in sweatpants there’s no judgements or requirements. It’s all about the love.

Imagine not being afraid to say your piece…. Yep, you can speak your mind without being shut down! And when you call them out, it’s out of love and genuine concern. It’s about self respect, boundaries and wanting to make the relationship better.

Imagine having each other’s back… You feel equal return of support and confidence boosting whenever needed. You protect one another even though you both know that you are strong enough to look after yourself.

Imagine being able to discuss anything… Your conversations are no holds barred because you know that there are no judgements about anything you might say or bring up.

Imagine simple things being fun…. Even if you are running errands and chores together you find joy because you really enjoy each other’s company.

Imagine being happy with silence. The both of you could sit in perfect silence both doing your own thing and still feel the love without uttering a single word.

Imagine feeling secure in love You know that you are loved and your partner would never risk losing you. So how does that sound? Where are you today?

A QUEEN’S GOOD LOVE versus TOXIC LOVE CHECKLIST

Often we push aside the red flags and ignore the deeds of good loving versus toxic loving. This checklist will help you love yourself enough to know the difference.

CHECK 1: FEELING SECURE

Good Love: You are never left wondering. You know exactly where you stand. Never left guessing about where you are in the relationship. You can ask questions without fear. You are certain about their intentions.

Toxic: Forever trying to navigate the shifting sands and changing goal posts. The relationship never seems quite secure. Mixed signals are the norm.

CHECK 2: VULNERABILITY DRAWS YOU CLOSER

Good love: Space is held for you while you open up, become tender and unfold. Being loved during this stage opens you both up to deeper intimacy.

Toxic: Your fears, concerns or emotions are pushed away, told you’re “overreacting” and used against you at some point probably sooner rather than later.

CHECK 3: YOU BOTH HAVE A LIFE.

Good love: Neither desire to consume the other and value the importance of the growth that happens through outside interests, friendships and hobbies.

Toxic: Fosters co-dependency, discourages growth, wants ownership, control and possession of your life.

CHECK 4: BOTH YOUR MIND AND BODY ARE ADORED.

Good love: Even though your body is unconditionally adored too…good loving is more interested in what you think, how you feel, what your personality is than how you look.

Toxic: well…you know how that goes …

CHECK 5: YOU ARE HEARD

Good love: listens and truly hears you. If something isn’t ok, it is worked on and behaviour adjusted.

Toxic: Brushes off your anxieties or concerns; Doesn’t give value to it, demeans and devalues.

CHECK 6: YOU WANT TO RUSH HOME

Good love: A truly good relationship makes you want to be your best. You can’t wait to get home and tell them all about your trials and triumphs and struggles and successes !!

Toxic : doesn’t care, doesn’t encourage..turns it round to be all about them.

COMMENT “QUEEN” below to stand in solidarity together for the solution to the Relationship you want and a life that fulfils you.

I have a few spaces left at my free Masterclass “How To Be Queen in Your Relationships”.