#pot thoughts

We don’t really get to do that with c!Quackity.  I like the cinematic lore a lot, but cc!quackity’s streams are more like going to a movie premier where the director/actor is seated in the audience trying to gage everyone’s reactions.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  I like movies.  But we can’t be part of the story if all improv is filmed before we can make our comments. 

(And cc!Dream doesn’t even stream his lore!  Chat can’t participate at all in the story because we never even get the opportunity to.)

But that got me thinking... does cc!Wilbur’s chat potentially have a part in the dsmp lore?

Because cc!Wilbur doesn’t really acknowledge chat during his dream smp streams.  He doesn’t reply to comments or thank subscribers or ask us questions about things that he’s missed since his last stream.  At most, Wilbur will sometimes look at us and wink, like we’re the audience members in his silly little play.  I guess this means cc!Wilbur’s chat is kind of like cc!Quackity’s in a way... but I don’t know...

Have you ever seen Fleabag?

In Fleabag, the titular character will occasionally glance at or talk directly to the camera.  And none of the other characters in the show will notice these brief asides.  The character is merely breaking the fourth wall like she’s in a film noir.  

But then there was this one time when Fleabag “shared a look” with the audience, and the hot priest went, “What are you looking at?”  It shocked me to my very core when that happened.  Because suddenly, I realized that maybe I was more than just a member in the show’s audience.  It was more like I was in the character’s audience and always had been.

So... what if it’s not cc!Wilbur who “shares a look” with chat on occasion, but c!Wilbur breaking the forth wall to acknowledge the audience in his head that none of the other characters notice?  And what if, one day, another character does notice?

Suddenly, we, as cc!Wilbur’s chat, are no longer just mere bystanders watching cc!Wilbur’s performance and clapping at the end of the scene.  No, we could potentially be the made up audience in c!Wilbur’s head.  We could be c!Wilbur’s delusions brought on by stress or mental illness, a way to cope with his trauma manifested as a theater kid’s beloved and attentive audience.

Because, listen, the writers were definitely trying to tell a very specific story with Eric, and I think most people are missing it.  I mean, he practically got a whole episode to himself this season and it's like no one even paid attention to it, beyond the fact that he cheated.  Like, did no one else see him grow?  Was no one else proud?  Because I was proud.  See, I really connected to Eric's journey of self-discovery and confidence while I watched this season, so it kinda sucks that whenever anyone talks about his arc, it’s with confusion and hurt, some even calling Eric a biphobic villainous asshole.  And I guess that just makes me sad...  I got to watch a character fall in love with his crush and then realize that their personalities didn't exactly mesh.  I got to watch a character and his best friend drift apart since they were both focused on relationships with different people.  And then I got to watch them inevitably drift back together like they hadn’t spent a single day apart, because that’s how some best friends work.  I got to watch a character travel to a whole other world only to find a part of himself there.  And I got to watch that character return home with the realization that his high school relationship with Adam might no longer be what he wants or what would make him most... fulfilled.  (And I got to watch all that performed by a very talented actor who was able to make me feel all of these incredible emotions in the limited number of scenes Eric’s character got this season.  I mean, Ncuti Gatwa's performance was *chef's kiss*.)

And I'm not saying you have to like Eric's arc this season, because if you don't like something, you don't like something.  It's as simple as that.  I guess I just wish someone else enjoyed Eric's story this season as much as I did.  Because, like I said before, I felt connected to Eric this season.  His arc was actually super comforting, in a weird way, because he felt very... human.  He did something selfish, and humans, as a species, are selfish sometimes.  I’m selfish sometimes.  And maybe... that’s not a bad thing???  Perhaps I'm completely wrong, but I think this show, through Eric's arc, was trying to tell us something about how we treat people who make mistakes and how we treat ourselves after we make a mistake.  Listen, it's your life and it is absolutely okay to be a little selfish sometimes and to seek what will make you most fulfilled, even if that might ruin a good thing.  Just because you're told that you should be grateful for what you have, doesn't mean that you can’t strive for more.  Love comes and goes, relationships blossom and wilt.  That is the nature of things.  The only constant in your life is... yourself.  So do what you want.  Try new things.  And when you make mistakes, learn from them.  That's what life should be about.

*sigh* I'm not sure if I managed to explain my point, but I can't read this over again or I'll go mad.  So,  I'll leave you with this.  If you've made it this far, I would like to suggest that you maybe go back and watch Eric’s last few scenes at the end of this season, and just notice how his character is portrayed after his breakup.  He's happy and thriving, isn't he?  He's in full makeup, and fancy garb, and he can't stop smiling, and he's hanging out with his best friend in the whole world.  He's outside in nature, building a freaking treehouse!  He almost looks taller, too, standing up straighter.  He's more sure of himself and looks like he’s more certain of his role in the universe.  And I say: Good. For. Him!   

Maybe this is a controversial opinion, but I think people who mess up deserve to be happy too.  And I'm glad that the writers of Sex Education portrayed this idea in their show for teenagers, and that it was portrayed by an openly gay, poc character who was so recently beloved by the masses.  I have always loved Eric Effiong, but he officially made my list of most favorite characters of all time because of his arc this season.  And I'm sad that for most people Eric actually lost his spot on their favorites list for the very same reason.  It's actually a little fascinating... I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts on this.

and let me tell you, watching logan’s body language change every few seconds as he tries to figure out this kid’s humor and whole... shtick?  that was so honest to how I think a lot of millennials feel when they first witness gen z speak fucking circles around them.  I don’t remember when I realized it -  that gen z was going to be smarter than us, by nature of how much easier it is every year to access and share information - but I definitely reacted just like Logan.  “Oh, you’ll change your mind.”  “When do you think the disillusionment will kick it?”  and then, the more you listen, the more you realize, oh, no, I’m wrong.  these kids have something to say and we should keep listening.  cuz a lot of the genz-er’s have been disillusioned from the very start!  they’re just like fuck the society our parents and grandparents created, let’s do what we think is fun because who knows if any of this is even real, so why the fuck not? gen z’s mindset, you guys??? it still blows me away every single day.

I got to see this realization play out right in front of me in the form of Logan fucking Paul.  and it was beautiful!  

that whole podcast episode was a work of genius and I’m not really sure whose genius it was.  was it Tommy’s?  was it Logan’s?  or was it simply the universe giving me something I didn’t know I needed once again?

is tom my new favorite character?