i think one of my issues with some (not all!!) discussions about phanes is that it can end up as justifying colonialism and like trying to justify all of phanes' actions.
like instead of being "oh wow phanes is clearly a ruler with very strict rules and very harsh punishments for defying these rules. i can see how their fear of the abyss and their desperation has led them to this point."
i feel like i see more "the dragons sucked, it's such a good thing that phanes came along and made it better." or "wow (insert nation researching the abyss here) totally deserved it, they should have know not to break the rules."
like phanes is so interesting, because they are basically the protector of the last of humankind and they will do whatever necessary to keep them alive. even if it means destroying entire civilizations and basically keeping humanity in a bottle.
whether it be phanes, nibelung, koitar, or the voyager, i think that genshin is trying to show that none of them are completely right or completely wrong. so while you might have one you like the most, none of them should be considered entirely good or justified.
also it's totally fine to like a character! if you think koitar is the best, then more power to you! if you think nibelung and phanes should make out, that's awesome and i completely agree! just remember that these are characters with a lot of sides and are very complicated and have all done some crazy stuff.
