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I was atrociously late to a seder because of a hospital shift.
All to say, when my rabbi opened the door for Elijah, he yelped when I was on his door step with an appearance akin to surviving a war, a beyond exhausted expression, and an iced coffee larger than my head.
I didn't even register his surprise when I asked, still in the door way "Hey, could i have some wine?"
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Once upon a time there was a girl whose wicked stepmother forced her to clean the entire house for Pesach all by herself. So while her stepmother and stepsisters left early for the grand seder at the Prince's palace, the girl spent the afternoon sweeping and dusting and washing and polishing. As she finally burned the last crumbs of chametz in the fireplace, she saw the sun setting and knew she would never make it to the Prince's seder on time, so she began to prepare her own meager dinner: a little Passover pizza. But miraculously, her fairy godmother appeared and transformed the pizza into a flying carpet to take her to the palace, and the cheese into a beautiful dress for her to wear. And to commemorate this story, to this very day, that cheese is named after that girl: they called her Matzah-rella.
Singular large frog upon ye. Chag Pesach Sameach homies
Passover falling on the evening of April Fools Day would be the funniest possible time for the prophet Elijah to come back btw
my friend consistently wishes me a "happy jewish easter" (referring to passover, though she typically sends it around purim time).
i, jokingly, wished her a happy christian passover this easter, mistakenly thinking that her holiday wishes were also a lighthearted joke. i have since been sentenced to six paragraph texts and groupchat mediation jail as if we were middle schoolers
as stupid as this whole thing is, its just frustrating that it's ok for my religion to be boiled down to "the default religion without jesus" by both my christian and atheist friends. i thought i got all the posts about cultural christianity out of my system with christmas, but i suppose there's no rest for the wicked
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Happy Passover βπ to everyone π€ and especially ππ to the little goat π my dad π¨ bought πΈ sure hope π nothing bad π happens to it! πΌ
"Kill them with kindness" wrong. 10 PLAGUES OF EGYPT!π©Έπ©Έπ©ΈπΈπΈπΈπͺ°πͺ°πͺ°π π π ππππ₯΅π₯΅π₯΅βοΈβοΈβοΈ π¦π¦π¦ ππππͺ¦πͺ¦πͺ¦
