#mobbing

My elementary teacher told my mom its like I've been raised in a glass globe, too sheltered. I grew up thinking I was different, this idea was reinforced on me not because I was too loved by my teachers, but because I was easy to use.

I listened when they told me to do something. Every task turned out good. They attained perfect results without lifting a finger because I could always handle it.This went on until high school, were kids like me were lined up. Making me feel less special, and like an imposter.

Then in college I was that girl again. Too different from her peers. Excelling in everything including doing their own damn job.In truth,I was just too obedient,and allowed everyone to walk over me. Didnt speak against mobbing, didn't utter a word when every mistake, every bad outcome was blamed on me, because I was the chosen scapegoat.

Again, my 'friends" started to hate me, and I blamed myself for being too different. This went on for four years. I was burnt out, depressed, had imposter syndrome and couldnt even be successful in my major. So I changed it. Now I'm here in a different college and major. I still have no one that I'd consider a close friend, but now I don't blame it on myself.

The only remeaning issue is I sometimes can't speak up, I feel like I have to blend in, go unnoticed to not go through the same experiences. But I know I can't be successful like this. So I'll try more.