#malec breakup

The final chapter of my prompt fic for @thelightofthebane is finally here!! This is a short epilogue of sorts, where we see some insight into Jace and Izzy and learn a little more about Alec. 

Thank you to everyone who has been here for the whole ride, and I really hope you like this final chapter!

Read on AO3

“How is he, Magnus? Is he happy?”

“He’s extremely happy,” Magnus responded, a smile blooming on his lips. “He just published his third book, the one he’s been over the moon about for months.”

“That’s great,” Izzy said, and Magnus could tell she was smiling, too, if a bit sadly. The line fell silent for a few seconds before she asked, “What’s he like?” It was the third time in as many weeks that she’d asked that question, but Magnus couldn’t exactly blame her.

“He’s still Alec,” Magnus replied. “He still loves cheesy romantic songs and he still has a soft spot for kids and cats and people who need help. He loves archery, and he teaches it to kids at special needs schools all over the state. He says it helps them focus and process things better, that most of the ones he meets like the repetitiveness of it.” Magnus smiled, tears filling his eyes. “He’s a writer now. He writes about the Shadow World, just like Clary used to draw it when she was a mundane. The books are beautiful. They tell our stories. Yours, mine, Jace’s. When you read them, you could almost convince yourself that he does remember, but he doesn’t.”

There was a strangled sound on the other end of the phone, and Magnus knew Izzy was crying, probably holding Jace’s hand as they both thought of Alec and where he was now compared to where he had been when they knew him. It was a feeling Magnus was all too familiar with.

“Tell us more,” Izzy said through her tears. “Please.”

Magnus was all too happy to grant her request.

The fic based on a prompt from @thelightofthebane is finally here! It will be posted in four chapters, this being the first <3 I hope you enjoy!! 

Read on AO3

Alec took a deep breath and willed his hands to stop shaking. He didn’t have much time.

The half-written letter on his desk glared at him, and Alec sighed. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t find the words. How was he supposed to tell his family that he would never see them again? It was feeling more and more like an impossibility with each minute that ticked by.

“Right,” Alec muttered to himself. “I can do this.” He picked up the pen once more.

Jace,

By the time you find this, I’ll be gone. You’re going to lose your parabatai rune. It’s going to feel like I’m dying, but I’m not. I can’t explain everything, but I’m doing this for Magnus. You didn’t see him at the loft, after I tried to propose. He was devastated. Heartbroken. He can’t go on like this, without his magic. He needs it back. This is the only way. I’m sorry. I love you and I wish I didn’t have to do this.

Please don’t look for me. I know I’m making the right choice. It’s hard, but it’s for the best. Watch out for the others. Don’t do what you always do and get yourself killed. Clary and the others are there, if you’d just let them be. Please let them, Jace, for me.

I’ll miss you. You’ll be okay, Jace. Everyone will be.

Remember that our rune is just a symbol of what we have. When it breaks, we won’t break. We’ll always be parabatai, even without the rune.

Alec

Alec exhaled shakily and folded the letter into an envelope, scrawling Jace’s name on top of it. There. That would have to do. There was so much more that he wanted to say to his parabatai, but he didn’t have the time. He still had to write letters for Izzy, his mom, and Magnus.

Alec took a deep breath and reached for another sheet of paper. He didn’t regret his choice, but he was starting to realise just how much he had to give up. Magnus, he reminded himself. This is for Magnus.

With that, Alec steeled himself and started to write once more.

Izzy,

By the time you find this, I’ll be gone. I’m not dead. I’m not being coerced into writing this. This is my choice. Please don’t look for me. Tell Jace not to look for me, too. Things are going to be bad for a while, but this is the way it has to be. I’m sorry.

I can’t explain everything right now; I’m running out of time. But just know that I’m doing this for Magnus, because I love him and because he deserves so much more than I could ever give him. Please take care of him for me, Iz. I know this won’t be easy, but it’s for the best.

I’ll miss you, Izzy. It’ll be alright, I promise. You’ll be okay without me. I love you, little sis.

Alec

It took all of his willpower to keep from breaking down. This was Izzy, this was his little sister, this was the person that he had watched over and taken care of since he was five. Leaving her felt a little like leaving a piece of himself behind, and Alec had to wonder how many pieces he would have left at the end of all this.

His shoulder burned for a split second, and Alec looked back just in time to see another rune disappear from his skin. He sucked in a deep breath, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. He had to keep going. The curse was working faster than he was.

Alec wrote Izzy’s name on her envelope and set it to the side with Jace’s, reaching for another sheet of paper. He had to hurry.

Agree with the writing bit. It was well done. Also yes, the focus is often on Alec (which is something both Magnus and Alec canonically disagree with too!!)

I don’t really agree with the emotionally manipulative part. Not to come across as someone who overlooks Magnus’ part in this, but I just want to extremely careful about the words I use.

Emotionally manipulative, to me, suggests clear motive and intention. It means that that person is deceptive and try to get what they want by being underhanded. Emotionally manipulative people are engage in careful bullying and gaslighting. (Sorry psych major) And of course not all of it applies to every scenario, but you get my meaning.

I don’t personally see him as emotionally manipulative. I don’t think he manipulated Alec’s emotions. I felt like he was either oblivious to them or avoided them.

“Days ago... I didn’t know the spark inside of you, the one I fell in love with... was out for good.”

not one person/soul/Thule:

Okay can we talk about something real quick? The breakup scene is one of the rare Malec scenes I only watched once because it hurt so bad.

It is extremely emotional, extremely well directed and well phrased, Harry and Matt delivered it perfectly - and if you've ever been in love and broke up with someone you still love, it will hit you like a truck.

So let's break it down, shall we? Let's start with Alec and Izzy's conversation and how selfless Alec is being. I'm not the first person he's loved and I won't be the last. He really believes that, too. He believes he's doing what's best. But it gets better worse.

Now let's go back to the actual scene. Imagine having to break someone's heart for their own good. Now imagine having your heart being broken at the exact same time and having to hold it together. I can't even begin to imagine how he must have felt when he had to say one thing he knew would break Magnus, the The spark I fell in love with is gone forever. That's one thing Magnus is insecure about and Alec goes down that road knowing Magus can never forgive him for that.

Magnus breaks down, begs Alec not to break up with him. I lost everything, he says. I can't bare to lose you too, he says. And Alec has to stand there and watch the man he loves break to pieces even if the only thing he really wants to do is to kiss him, and hug him, and tell him they are going to work it out. But he also knows there is no other way. Break his heart to save his life. That's the deal. That's the only thing he thinks will save Magnus. That's the best he can do.

But when Magnus kisses him, he almost loses it. He can't give in. He knows he can't. But how can he not when Magnus is right there in front of him and hurting. Magnus. His Magnus is hurting and he is the one to blame. And in that moment he makes the hardest decision he probably ever had to make and walks away thinking he is doing what's best. He walks away thinking he's never going to hold Magnus again. He walks away thinking he'll probably never see him again. And he does all that to ensure Magnus' happiness - not thinking of his own.

Raw emotion both Harry and Matt presented in this scene is something I can't even begin to describe. Your own heart breaks when you watch the scene. The desperation. The way Alec tries to hold himself together. The way Magnus begs him to stay (probably his first time begging anyone for anything). That damn kiss. The moment Alec almost gives in. The moment he walks away.