#limb differences

My name is M. I was born without an arm, specifically below the elbow on my right arm. I'm a college student.

I find as an amputee, approaching and asking about other amputees is much more socially acceptable. It’s like a shared experience that people acknowledge and whatnot. It’s great seeing another amputee out and about!

My personal preference is that I don’t mind answering questions or giving insight on the amputee community. I know that this is not an idea shared by everyone and a lot of other amputees don’t like stares or questions.

I do just about everything with my left hand which means my left hand is at more risk of being overused. It’s a common thing amongst amputees, especially as they grow older. 

Some things I do to adapt is use my nub (term used to refer to the shortened limb - others, usually leg amputees, may call them stumps) and my knee and a pinch action when opening items or things people normally do with the thumb to hold this down. I do have an elbow so if I have any light bags I usually just hook it on my elbow and I can carry it without thinking about it too much. Heavier items may mean I can’t do this. I applaud using my left hand and right elbow.

I find adapting to things comes more naturally to me as I was born with my differences. I utilize a lot of other body parts to make up for a hand. I also sometimes use any walls or other surfaces to help.

For example, if I’m putting up my hair, I go against a wall and use the wall to help hold up my hair while my hand ties it into a ponytail. I have found that hair claw clips are really easy to use. I do ask my friends to help me or hold stuff occasionally and they are really nice about it!

Sometimes I have to get creative to adapt, like playing the guitar (I taped a guitar pick to my nub to strum).

I have similar adaptations for opening sodas or packaging, although sometimes I genuinely do struggle. Getting larger containers is usually tricky so I am used to asking others for help when I need it.

Since I was born an amputee, I found prosthetics difficult to use. I never liked wearing a prosthetic for an extended period of time because the effort outweighed the use. When I did wear one, it would often clonk against things because I’d forget it was there and my brain wasn’t used to calculating space or dodging with the added length. It would also be uncomfortable in casual settings, where I’d have to try to find a position that worked around the arm. 

No amputee wears their prosthetic all the time. They become uncomfortable and exhausting to use.

Advanced prosthetics such as bionic ones are much more costly as they are able to move around, at the price of having to be charged + the expense. A lot of more affordable ones are more stagnant; they usually only have a specific use. They can be made more versatile with removable attachments for various individual functions.

In general it is easier for me to adapt tasks using my body or my surroundings than with a prosthetic.

I think people are often shocked I can do pretty basic things like tie my shoe or cut paper. They're also surprised I can do more athletic things like cartwheels and handstands (which I can't do now but when I was younger I could). I can do elbow planks or one handed regular planks; although I can do a regular plank, I’m just really slanted. Pushups are more falling than the push up itself.

People also definitely do infantilize me sometimes. Sometimes I get ableism where they think I can do everything an abled person can, but sometimes I've had people think I can't do anything, even when I advocate for myself. It can be hard for people to realize they're being ableist.