Hey shiloh, so I saw something that you said on a post that people CAN choose to be gay, and I couldn't stop thinking about it like: I've always been a lesbian or I chose to be one? because of stuff that I had to deal when I was younger, so I'm just really trying to understand how can anyone choose, can you explain what you meant? PS: you are such an inspiring human being and I love your tumblr!
ok let me clarify what i meant by that! that post was more directed @ transness but it can apply to gayness also. you didn’t choose to be gay, and i didn’t choose to be gay, and yet here we are together being super gay. however!!! seeing as how i am attracted to men (sort of, sometimes), and that i was born dyadic, i could have conceivably under different circumstances been totally unaware of the part of me that is gay & trans, or chosen to ignore it (out of fear or misinformation or whatever), and lived my life as a straight cis girl. i probably would have been miserable had i gone down that path, but it was an option that was available to me, and in many ways it would have been easiest.Â
i believe that due to western society and its fear & hatred of the feminine that there are many, many people for whom this is the case—who have the seed of potential for queerness or transness, who are attracted on some level to their own or nb genders, or who have a vague sense of the Genders, but that aspect of themselves is suppressed because of various internalized phobias that they have been infected with by society, and because they have the option to ignore it and live as a member of the majority. i believe that there are many more of these people than you might expect.
of course there are people (probably) who have never had a gay thought in their heads or are just super straight up cis. those are not the people i’m talking to. there are people out there who currently identify as straight or male who don’t necessarily need to identify as straight or male. i encourage everyone to explore their gender and sexuality to its fullest because sometimes their depth can surprise you. queerness & transness are not black and white and there are so so so many ways to be either and i welcome anyone to the Queer Trans Club regardless of whether they feel it was a choice that they made or something they had no choice in.i’m sorry i took so long to answer this but i really wanted to give you a thoughtful response and sometimes that takes me a while. you are very sweet! i hope this helped <3
