taking a moment to actually think out my "for often being branded as complete opposites, Porky and Daffy have many anchoring similarities which can be helpful as to why they gel so well as a dynamic" hypothesis. many of their core traits are the same--they just execute and rationalize those traits in very different ways.
they both can have rather obsessive personalities--Daffy's is more openly obsessive, coming off as abrasive and fanatical and driven. Porky's more obsessive from the inside, in that he can be very vengeful and go to comical lengths to see it through, often way beyond what the situation calls for. Daffy, in his case (both referring to his own obsession and in relation to Porky where relevant) IS the situation. Porky has a hard time truly detaching
this overlaps in that both characters are very stubborn. Porky in the more conventional sense of the word: bullheaded, often difficult to compromise with because he's so set in his ways and his line of thinking because that's all that he's acquainted with. Daffy's stubbornness feeds into his obsession and drive, though it's perhaps more of a product of escalation. Porky's stubbornness is more innate--depending on the context or director, Daffy builds up to his stubbornness
both characters are uniquely oblivious and even naive. this is again a bit more innate and visible with Porky, whose gullibility and is very woven into his personality. it's more a means of endearment, though. Daffy can be--and often is--surprisingly perceptive, but, as i've mentioned before, there's more than one instance of him misplacing/misreading intentions of a more villainous party. he has a history of accidentally befriending people who want him dead and not realizing the threat they pose until the last minute
part, or perhaps Much, of this stems from his entitlement.. which both characters have. Porky's entitlement is a stronger byproduct of his own oblivious rather than conscious conceit. it's Porky's world and we're all living in it--he's naturally a bit presumptuous and can have a tendency to accidentally belittle or condescend people, but it's not out of a conscious disregard. moreso, he just has trouble placing himself in others' shoes. Daffy is a bit more sly and smarmy with his own entitlement, but much of it can be born out of his own obliviousness/naivete. there is more of a knowingness and acceptance with him. if you were to call him out on his conceit, he'd probably shrug it off or perhaps even agree. Porky would probably get offended and argue with you and insist that he's not, or that you're wrong, seeing it as a pejorative
this certainly isn't all that they share, nor the extent of these branches... a lot of it is also circumstantial with the nature of these shorts. but it's fun to think about! i wonder less if they're total opposites, and moreso just process and react in opposite ways. but they really are bonded by a lot of strengths and flaws alike
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to find promise of peace (and the solace of rest): a TMA fanfic
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Chapter 89: July 2017
[CLICK]
JON
Statement of Jonathan Sims, head archivist of the Magnus Institute, London, regarding the upcomingā¦umā¦operation. Twelfth July, 2017. Recording taken direct from subject.
I-I wanted to get some thoughts down before, um, everything. We all should. Iāll, Iāll mention it to them.
[Deep breath] Martin is home. Thatā¦that seems like the most important place to start, honestly. Martin is home. Heās home and heās safe andā¦I-I know he feels the trip was a waste of time, that he didnāt learn anything of substance, but he did. Timās right, we could never have just gone up to Great Yarmouth and staked out the House of Wax until it looked like things were ready. We have to know. And thanks to Martin, we do. Three days after Orsinov got the skinā¦or, well, after she called in all herā¦minions, but I-I rather suspect those are one and the same. She wouldnāt have waited long.
Forty-eight hours. Give or take.
We have a plan. Itāsā¦I donāt know if itās a good plan, but itās a plan, and we have it. And it should work. Martin and Melanie andā¦they picked it over with a fine-toothed comb, and they say it should work. Myself, Daisy, Martin, Melanie or TimāIām not sure which right nowāand Basira, weāll be heading up to Great Yarmouth either late tomorrow or early morning the day after, while Sasha andā¦whoever the other one is stay behind. Gertrudeās notes were very clear. Unless the ritual is underway, anything we do can be easily repaired. But if we time it right, itāll be centuries, maybe more, before they can try it again. Of course, if we time it wrongā¦
Daisy has been pretty clear that she thinks her best chance of success is to go in alone, and honestly, I struggle to disagree with her. [sigh] Martin didnāt, though. I donāt know what surprised me more, that he simply told her he was going with or that she didnāt argue. They seem to have come to some kind ofā¦uneasy truce. I think they both have the same feeling, that they need to see it through, and that they need to protect the rest of us. Theyāre planning on it just being the two of them going, or at least going in.
Thatāthat isnāt happening. Martin isnāt going without me. I, I canāt let him out of my sight, not for that. I just got him back, Iā
I donāt care if this is an official record. I donāt care who listens to this outside the Archives. I will say it and I will not deny it. I need him to be safe, and I need to know heās safe, and the only way I can do that is to go in there with him. So. Iām going. Whether he wants me to or not.
I think Basira feels the same way. About Daisy, I mean. Or at least about letting Daisy go without her. Seeing what theyāve seen, doing what theyāve doneā¦itās a hell of a bond. I would know. Even if itās not romantic for them, itās the same bond Martin and I have. The same bond Martin and Melanie have, too, so sheāll likely be coming along as well. Weāve already discussed it, the rest of us, and weāre in agreement. Theyāre not going alone.
ā¦
Thereās something different about him. I, I canāt put my finger on it. Itās not anything physical. He still looks the same, feels the same, [heh] smells the same. Heās still the same person heās always been, the same man IāI fell in love with. But thereās aā¦a confidence? No, that isnāt right. But thereās something. Itās like itās lurking just under the surface, something I canāt explain, something I canāt reach. Something happened to him while he was gone. All right, yes, I know thatās an understatement. Of course āsomething happened to himā. He was kidnapped, for Godās sake, he was stabbed and nearly died andāI almost lost him. And I never would have knownā¦
[SMALL, STIFLED SOB]
[SNIFF]
B-but it, itās more than that. I wouldnāt say he came back different, but he came backā¦with something different, maybe? Thereās something I donāt understand. Something he hasnāt said.
There will be time. After. When itās all said and done. When we get backā¦weāll have all the time in the world. I can ask him then, andā¦and heāll tell me. I know he will. I trust him.
I love him.
If this is my final messageā¦let it be that.
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
BASIRA
Um. Statement of Basira Hussain, twelfth July, 2017, at the request of Jonathan Sims.
Iām not sure why Iām here. I mean, I understand how I got to this point. Just a series of decisions until, yep, this is my life now! But I donāt know why. Does that make sense?
I donātā¦I donāt really want to be here. I shouldnāt be here. Martinās never said anything, but I know heās disappointed, maybe a little annoyed, that I came back after he told me not to. And he was right, I should have stayed away. But IāI couldnāt abandon Daisy. I couldnāt just give up on her. And the only way I could think of to find her was to come to the Magnus Institute, and now Iām a goddamned hostage. At least I donāt really have it as bad as the others. Itās amazing how much you can ignore when youāve got your nose in a book.
Iām, Iām trying not to resent the way theyāre treating Daisy. I know they donāt understand her. Butātheyāre not afraid of Martin. I mean, yes, okay, completely different abilities, and he was a librarian, not a cop. But she did what she had to do to survive, just like him. Just like theirā¦other friend. Itās not her fault that what she needs looks scarier to other people. And itās not like itās all bad. The things she does have stopped some very dangerous people. And why shouldnāt she enjoy what she needs to sustain herself sometimes? Itās like those dieters who think that if food tastes good, it canāt be healthy. Sheās allowed to get some pleasure in it when she can.
ā¦
Martin gets it better, I suppose. Since, you know, heās the same way she is, especially now. Not hard to see theyāre on the same level or whatever. He at least hasnāt been outright hostile to her. She seems about as friendly with him as she ever did anyone else on the force. Dunno if Iād call them friends, but at least theyāre standing on the same side, and I think theyāll turn their backs on each other. Daisy doesnāt do that for many people.
I know they donāt see it, but Daisyās true blue. You always know where you stand with her. I never doubted she had my back in the field when I took the lead, even if I didnāt do it very often. I owe it to her to have her back here.
So yeah, thatās why Iām going. I donāt trust anyone else to care if she comes back alive. Even her, really. Sheāll be looking to get the job done, not protect herself. Sheāll need someone spotting her, and that someone is going to be me.
Itās nice to have one thing certain in all this. One damned thing I can control.
[DEEP BREATH, SLOW EXHALE]
Maybe thatās why Iām here. Not just to back Daisy up, but these guys get soā¦bogged down in details. Itās not just not seeing the forest for the trees. They canāt even see where the trail is. Me, I can at least think in a straight line. Control. Balance. Something steady.
I dunno. Maybe Iām overthinking it, too. Maybe there is no reason Iām here. Or maybe why I need to be here isā¦further out. Maybe I donāt need to be here right now, but if Iām not here now, I wonāt be later. I donāt know.
I guess weāll find out.
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
SASHA
Sasha James, archival assistant at The Magnus Institute, London, recording statementā¦hmā¦letās see if I can get this rightā¦0171207ā¦dashā¦C? Hope weāre dividing these up by letters, otherwise Iāve just fucked up the system. [Slightly nervous giggle] Statement taken direct from subject.
I wish I wasnāt staying. Iām not going to lie. I wish there was a way we could do this without meāwithout anyoneāhaving to stay back. But someone needs to stay, and Iām not going to be any use in setting bombs, so itās going to be me.
It should probably be Jon and Tim who stay, letās be honest. Theyāve both been Marked by the StrangerāTim really, really deeply, and Jonā¦well, at least, Iām assuming heās been Marked. Not like any of us have asked Martin to take another Look since that first night, so I could be wrong. Anyway, what if that means Orsinov and her minions come looking for them? Or worse, what if the Marks are so powerful they get drawn into the Unknowing whether they want to or not?
God, choosing to participate is bad enough. Being killed to be used is worse. But being drawn into it, knowing what walking in will do and not being able to stopā¦even if by some miracle they survived that, theyād never be over it.
Well. I mean. If we donāt stop it, the worldās going to end, too, so thereās that.
Iām scared. Iāoh, I didnāt mean to say that. I really donāt want that to be my last words. āHere lies Sasha James. She was scared all the time.ā Itās not true, I meanā¦Iām not scared all the time. But this does scare me. Partly because itās the Stranger, and, well, itās our opposite, right? I can only imagine how much weād all be punished in a world made for it. Partly because it almost killed me once. The Not-Them was definitely after me, and the only reason Iām alive is because I didnāt go near the table that night in Artifact Storage. PartlyāmostlyāIām scared for the others.
I mean, what Iām doing, itās not exactly dangerous. Iām not going to die doing it. Probably. Most likely. Itās the others who are likely to be killed orāunmade, maybe. If things go wrong for me, I probably wonāt lose anything but a paycheck or two, at most.
ā¦
I donāt want Melanie to go. I know thatās stupid. Martin will look after herāheād die before he let her get hurt, or Jon. But I justā¦I feel better when I know where she is, and that sheās okay. She keeps going off and doing stupid, dangerous shit with Tim and Jon and itās justā
No. No, I need to be honest. Thatās why weāre doing this, right? Itās not that sheās doing dangerous stuff with them. Itās that sheās doing it without me. I want to be there with her. I mean, we worked pretty well together when I went up to Great Yarmouth with her and Tim that time to stake the place out, and [heh] that impromptu make-out session we did to stop the random beat cop from getting suspicious was pretty fun, too.
Yeesh, this is pathetic. And Iām doing it on an official recording. Oh, my God, Martin is going to skāheās going to hit the ceiling if he listens to this. Soās Jonā¦well, maybe not Jon. I bet he spent his fair share of this tape mooning over Martin, too.
Okay. Get it together, Sasha. Make your statement, face your fears.
So. Yeah. Iām afraid something is going to happen to the others. Iām afraid something is going to happen to Melanie in particular, and Iām afraid that something is going to go wrong and the first Iāll know of it is when the world goes weird around me.
I mean, weirder than normal.
And I donāt know what I can do about it. Other than hold up my end of the plan and hope theirs goes well, too.
[DOOR OPENING]
MELANIE
Sasha?
SASHA
Hm?
MELANIE
Elias wants to see us. All of us.
SASHA
Right now?
MELANIE
Yeah. Says it canāt wait.
SASHA
Okay. Coming.
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
MELANIE
Melanie King, twelfth of July, 2017, 11:37pm.
Yeah, I took it home to do this, what are you going to do about it? Maybe I wanted to be able to set proper wards. Maybe I donāt want anyone listening in.
I canāt believe Martin actually thought I would stay back. I canāt believe he considered it for even a second. Has he not figured out by now that every single time one of us goes off on our own, something goes horribly wrong? I mean, even when weāre together, things go bad. Iāve thought about making a statement about the Mermaid Inn, just so I stop having the fucking nightmares about it again.
On the whole, I preferred the ones about Aldershot, even if I did have to suffer through knowing Jon was watching, the bastard. I know it wasnāt his fault, but damn it, it just made me soā¦angry. [Sigh] Still not sure if that was because he was watching like it was a goddamned show or because I knew he didnāt know I knew he was there. After we got to be friends, I guess what made me the angriest was that I knew it was hurting him almost as much as it hurt me, but I couldnāt stop what I was doing and I couldnāt even step out of the patterns of the dreaming far enough to let him know I knew he was there. It just reminded me that I had no control over everything, and I hate that.
Iām angry a lot. I always have been. I feel like Iāve always been fighting. Having brothers like Martin and Gerry especially meant thatānot that I had to fight them, but I had to fight for them. Martin would always try to make himself nonthreatening and Gerry would find the spaces in between to slip through, but I never wanted to do that. No one makes space for people like us. Youāve got to elbow the comfortable idiots out of the way and then claw your way up with gritted teeth. I know it sounds stupid to call starting a ghost hunting show a fight, but it was. Tooth and nail. And I did it, and I won. And then it all fell apart, and I canāt even find the point when it did. But Iām still fighting. New package, same patterns. EliasāGod, what an asshole. I just want to rip hisā
[CAT MEWS]
No, not you, baby. No, Mummyās busy right nowāokay, fine, fine, you can stay. OwāJesus, not the claws. There, settle down and be good now.
[PURRING UNDERSCORES THE REST OF THE STATEMENT]
God, when did I start losing the parts of myself that werenāt anger?
When was the last time I teased one of my brothers, or said something that wasnāt either neutral or meant to hurt? Iām not mad at them. Well, maybe a little bit at Martin for trying to be allā¦white knight, loose cannon, lone wolf type. He doesnāt have to do this alone, and he shouldnāt, and he fucking knows that, but heās still trying.
I, I hate that. And I hate Mum for doing that to him, for making him think it doesnāt matter if he dies as long as the people around him survive. Not even just the people he cares about, the people he doesnāt even know. Canāt he see that saving the world isnāt going to mean anything to the rest of us if we lose him in the process? If he dies, I will get Gerry to bring him back again just so I can fucking kill him myself.
Losing Gerry like we did is what spelled the end of Ghost Hunt UK. I know that now. I was just so angry and I didnāt have anyone to be angry at, because it was just stupid bad genetics and our usual rotten luck that killed him, so I was angry at the whole universe. Itās why I stayed away from Martināso I wouldnāt take it out on himābut that just meant I took it out on everyone else I came into contact with, and I know thatās a big part of why we started struggling after that. Iām afraid that will happen again, andāthe Archives are different. We, we canāt quit. Weāre trapped there, and if we get angry and start falling apart, weāll just beā¦trapped with people who hate us, and who we hate, and thatās just going to be miserable for everyone.
But itās more than that. Tim and Jon, theyāre, theyāre my brothers, and itās nothing to do with them being with Gerry and Martin. Jon was my brother before Martin even admitted he was falling for him, and I think Tim would have been, eventually, even if he and Gerry werenāt making the beast with two backs.
I donāt want to lose my family. And I especially donāt want it to be my fault.
[DEEP BREATH]
So Martin is not going to die, and I am going to know who to blame if he gets hurt, and I will direct my anger at the appropriate people if the time comes.
And it looks like if all else fails, I can just cuddle up with you on my chest and Iāll be relaxed in no time.
Heh. Cats. I shouldāve got one years ago. Theyāre better than Prozac.
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
DAISY
I donāt know what you want from me.
And whatever it is, youāre not getting it.
ā¦
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
ARCHIVIST
Statement of Martin Blackwoodā¦[sigh] the Archivist, in advance of departure for Great Yarmouth. Recorded direct from subject, thirteenth July, 2017. Statement begins.
Everythingās set. Weāre leaving in the morning, before sunrise. Daisy left a few minutes ago to āborrowā one of the disused Breekon and Hope vans so we can blend in a little better around the House of Wax, and once sheās sure itās running properly, sheāll let us all know. Then weāll meet up here at the Institute and make our way up. I definitely prefer rail travel, but, well, we canāt exactly do that with fifty pounds of plastic explosives in tow. Not without a permit, anyway.
Iāmā¦not surprised, honestly, that the others insisted on coming along. Bit annoyed, but not surprised. If it were the other way around, I wouldnāt want to let Jon out of my sight, either. Itās justā¦I need them to be safe. And going into the House of Wax is about as far from safe as you can get without coming back in the other direction.
I suppose I should be glad. I mean, at least if theyāre with us, I can watch them. Iāll know where they are, and that theyāre safe. But Iām worried. The Stranger isāwell, unpredictable. Elias wasnāt wrong about that. Thereās every chance theyāll be where we donāt expect, do what we havenāt prepared for. Itās not the Web, sure, but it can still lure you in. And I havenāt forgotten that it was Jon trying to smack a spider that caused him to knock the hole in his office wall and let the Corruption out, or that one bit Sasha to tell her where the manual release for the fire suppression system was. Pretty sure there were a few lurking in that shack in the swamp, too. The Web is interested, Iām pretty sure, and if it teams up with the Stranger, God help us.
Iām not just worried. Iām afraid. Iām afraid that Iām going to lose my sister and the man I love to something that very nearly killed me once already and is the antithesis of everything we are, and Iām afraid that Iām going to be so focused on protecting them that I forget to protect Basira and Daisy, and Iām afraid that Iām going to be so distracted by all four of them that I forget to protect myself. And Iām afraid, terribly afraid, that if the Stranger gets hold of me the others will try to rescue me instead of disrupting the ritual. I refuse to be the reason the world ends.
IāmāIām going to have to talk with Daisy. Again. Sheāsā[small laugh] fucking terrifying, but sheās also strong and no-nonsense. I trust her. I am putting that on the official record: I trust her. And I am trusting that if it all goes to shit, if I somehow get captured, she wonāt waste time trying to get me out, and she wonāt let Jon or Melanie waste time or energy on that either. If something happens to me, she needs to get them out, whether they want to go or not.
She will. I know she will.
ā¦
Iāve, Iāve been thinking about a television show I loved when I was a kid. Used to borrow the tapes from the library when I could, tooāhavenāt watched it in ages, but itās one of those shows that sticks with you, you know? Iāve had a few lines from it bouncing around my head these last couple days. Everything from Mr. Garibaldi saying that āif we lose, there is no āthen whatā, and if we win, what nextā to Kosh saying āthe avalanche has already started; it is too late for the pebbles to voteā to that doctor on Downbelow saying āI did the necessary thing. That is not always the same as the right thing.ā [Bitter laugh] You know, all kinds of cheerful things like that.
But there are a couple more I keepā¦coming back to, when things start getting dark. One is Ivanovaās speech at the end of the very last episode, when she talks about what the station meant, and the other, um, was from the third season finale. And, umā¦maybe itās not exactly the most professional thing in the world, butā¦just in case, for posterity, Iām going to try to remember it, exactly the way he said it.
[DEEP BREATH]
[FAINT, GENTLE STATIC]
āThere is a greater darkness than the one we fight. It is the darkness of the soul that has lost its way. The war we fight is not against powers and principalities, it is against chaos and despair. Greater than the death of flesh is the death of hope, the death of dreams. Against this peril we can never surrender. The future is all around us, waiting, in moments of transition, to be born in moments of revelation. No one knows the shape of that future or where it will take us. We know only that it is always born in pain.ā
[STATIC FADES]
We canāt give up. We have to keep hope.
Weāve got this.
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
TIM
Let the record show that I am only doing this because Jon and Martin both asked me. I fucking hate these things. Maybe a little less knowing that itā¦well, helped Martin while he was gone, but still. Whatever you are, I think youāre a nosy bastard and I would normally never tell you any of this. But itās important to them, soā¦fine.
Theyāre leaving soon. The others. Wellā¦I mean, āsoon,ā I donāt know exactly when. Itās, um, itās late. We stayed at the office later than usual, waiting for Daisy to get back with the van, but then Martin got in touch with her and said she was having trouble. Um, something about the fuel injector? I donāt know, Iām not a car guy. Whatever it is, she said it was going to take longer than she thought, so Martin told us all to go home and try to get some rest. Theyāll call when theyāre leaving. And when that happens, I guess Iāll be going back to the Institute.
I, I have to see them go. I canātāI need to know theyāre leaving. I know that sounds stupid. Intellectually, I know theyāre leaving. Like, thereās no doubt about that. Butā¦I need to see it. I need to watch them walk awayāor drive away, whateverāand know that theyāre going, and where theyāre going.
I didnāt get that with Danny. He was there, and then I woke up the next morning, and he was gone. It was luckāgood or bad, who knowsāthat I even figured out where he went. And IāmāIām pretty sure he was long gone by the time I got there. What I saw, what I thoughtāit, it wasnāt Danny. Just a costume, really, or aāa sham over a prop. Like gluing the spine of an old book to a block of wood to save a space on the shelf, but when you pull it down, thereās nothing really there.
I keep trying to remember what the last thing I said to him was. When was the last time I told him I loved him? I mean, he knew, right? He had to. But did I tell him? Did I actually say it, or did I just fuss at him for being an idiot, try to calm him down, and go to bed when nothing worked? Itā¦wasnāt like when we were little. This wasnāt him waking up crying from a dream and me wiping his eyes and making him cocoa and talking him back to reality. It happened, and there was nothing I could have done about that.
I could have tried harder, though.
My earliest memory is of my dad lifting me up so I can see into the crib, showing me this tiny red spud with a shock of black hair sticking up all over the place, and telling me that I have a responsibility now. And then he woke up and just looked at me, andāand the minute I met his eyes, big blue eyes full of wonder and awe, I knew Iād do anything for him. Looking after him was never a burden, you know? It was just a thing I did. [Small laugh] Maybe it wouldāve been different if Iād had to, like if weād had shitty home lives like Martin and Jon and Sasha did, but no, just my little brother tagging along and me making sure he was okay until he was big enough to handle himself, and it was good.
And then there was something he actually needed me to protect him from. And I didnāt.
Thatās why Iām staying back. Melanie needs to go, she needs to be there for her brother. And Jonā¦well, Jon really doesnāt need to go, actually. I think Elias said he needed to stay behind knowing that he wouldnāt, and knowing that Martin wouldnāt fight him too hard, so if something awful does happen and Jonā¦um, gets hurtā¦Martin will spiral into guilt, and probably be easier to manipulate into doing something really goddamn stupid under the guise of protecting the rest of us. Basira wonāt be any help, so if anyone is staying to help Sasha, itās going to be me.
Which, hey. At least I get to take this case of the mean reds out on something.
[Sigh] Good luck, everyone. Bring the house down. Iāll be waiting for you when you get home.
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
GERRY
Never talked to one of these before. Gertrude barely let me near them, and I didnāt put my statement on tape when I first got back. Didnāt need to, really, they were all there, and we werenāt sure back then if anyone else was listening to them. Canāt risk the Supreme Bastard knowing Iām alive, after all. Well [bitter laugh], for a given value of alive, anyway.
But if this goes right, he wonāt have a chance to find out, soā¦I might as well get my thoughts on the record, too.
Timā¦heās, uh, heās sleeping. I managed to convince him to lie down after he finished his part of the tape, and for all he claimed he wasnāt tired, heās snoring right now with his head in my lap. Going to try not to wake him up. Me, I havenāt slept since Martin got home. I canāt risk it. Every time I start thinking about sleepingā¦well, thatās when Iām at my most vulnerable, I guess. Thatās when the flashbacks come on. They might not always be bad, but, uh, [nervous laugh] I donāt want to run the risk that Iām going to either relive something inconvenient in my life or go through someone elseās near death experience that leads to me seeing all the flaws in this plan or worrying too much about everyone dying, so, no. I can sleep when itās all over.
Iām going. Tomorrow. Martin doesnāt know thatāneither does Melanie, come to think of itābut I am. Theyāre probably both going to throw a wobbly and try to talk me out of it, but come on. Itās like the biggest Leitner weāve ever tried to burn. They need me there.
Thatās what I plan to tell them, anyway. And itās the truth. Part of the truth. Really, though, itās that I need to protect them. IāI canāt let them go into a dangerous situation without me, not when Iām able to go with them. Even apart from the usualā¦this, this thing I can do, I can see if theyāre about to die andā¦well, prevent it by not touching them. I donāt even have to know the details of how theyāre going to die. I just have to not poke the death point.
Martin can probably use another pair of eyes watching everyoneās back, too. He told me about his newā¦position. God, I hope he gets a raise out of it tooā¦anyway, heās now officially responsible for the others instead of just feeling responsible for them, so heās going to be even more anxious about them on top of being anxious about stopping the Unknowing. And I canāt dieāprobablyāso Iām as good a bodyguard as anyone.
Besides that. I promised Tim that if thereāsāif anything goes really wrong, if thereās someone there whoāsā¦I wonāt let them suffer. I, I can reapā¦souls, I guess, without them being on the cusp of dying. I try not to, because those [sigh] are more substantial than the already-dying ones and I donāt want to get addicted to that, but itās a thing I can do. So if there are people there that areā¦trapped, between living and dying, caught in a cycle of perpetual undeath as they await the Danceā¦I should be able to, um, pull them to one side.
Probably not the side theyād prefer, butā
[BUZZING]
[MIDI VERSION OF OPERATIC ARIA BEGINS PLAYING]
Whatāoh, really, Tim?
TIM
Huh? Wha?
GERRY
I get why your ringtone for Martin is an aria, but does it have to be from I Pagliacci?
TIM
I donāt know anything about operas, okay? I just grabbed something at random.
[RINGING AND BUZZING STOPS]
Hey, Marto. Whatās up?
ā¦
Iāll be right there.
ā¦
The fuck I donāt. Iām on my way, okay?
ā¦Yeah, see you soon.
Theyāre getting ready to go.
GERRY
Itās two in the goddamn morning.
TIM
Traffic will probably be better.
[GERRY SIGHS]
GERRY
Right. Iāll meet them at the north end of Brompton.
TIM
Iāll tell them.
ā¦Be careful, okay?
GERRY
I will. I promise.
[KISS]
[CLICK]
āāā
[CLICK]
ARCHIVIST
Right, weāre getting ready to leave now. Tim brought this back with him when he came to sayāto wish us luck, and I asked everyone to give me a second before I go out to join them.
Iām locking this in Timās desk drawer so it doesnāt accidentally get usedā¦somehow. If we donāt come back, o-or we come back wrong, or different, this might be the only record of us, and I want it safe.
If youāre listening to this, and youāre not on this tapeā¦find Tim and Sasha. Timothy Stoker and Sasha James. They should be around the Archives somewhere, and theyāll explain everything you need to know. Thereās a Polaroid taped to the back of thisāmake sure they match. Theyāll, theyāll be able to explain that, too.
If you are on this tape, and youāre listening to this becauseā¦well, because one of us didnāt come backā¦Iām sorry. I am. Iām sorry that this is the last recording you have of whoeverā¦i-itās probably, no, definitely me. Iām not losing them, and I will give my last breath to protect them, so if youāre listening to hear someoneās voice, itās probably mine.
But if youāre able to listen, that means it was worth it.
In The Better Angels of Our Nature, Steven Pinker writes, āpeople consider the harms they inflict to be justified and forgettable, and the harms they suffer to be unprovoked and grievous.ā
Ā
Ā
This last week I was watering a spot of seed on my front yard when I noticed that someone did not clean up after their dog. I was pretty unhappy about it and my first impulse was to be indignant. But asā¦
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