I LOVEEE JOE BARTOLOZZI!! I used to hate muscles so much, they looked weird to me, but oh my GODDD how can a man be this funny and good looking I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE!! (Skinny guys and girls are still my fav tho shh)
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I LOVEEE JOE BARTOLOZZI!! I used to hate muscles so much, they looked weird to me, but oh my GODDD how can a man be this funny and good looking I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE!! (Skinny guys and girls are still my fav tho shh)

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Can you please please pleaseeeee do a joe bart fanfic again but Christmas related
ofcc lovely
a gingerbread mess - joe bartolozzi
summary... you and joe are building a gingerbread house
⚠︎ fluff
divider- @madamesocs
you and joe are sitting in front of the camera, waiting for chat to come and arrive, the gingerbread houses sitting on the table and chat starts flooding in
joe- hellooooo everybody flooding innn, he yells "how are we on this fantastic sundayy", he says hyping up chat
joe- today we are building gingerbread houses and I'm here with, he says stopping at his sentence
y/n- y/nn, you say waving your hands
joe- yes I'm here with y/n, and we are building gingerbread houses, he clarifies. "I did this last year and now I'm doing it this year with y/n"
y/n- yes so we both got a gingerbread house and a gingerbread person we have to decorate in 30 minutes, you say pulling your phone out for the timer, "and I got a regular gingerbread house and joe has". as you tried to pick up joe's box joe's spoke
joe- no I wanna show my own, he says smiling
y/n- ok, show em
and as joe lifted his gingerbread box and start a smiling you spoke
y/n- joe has a minion house, and before we start you have to rate our houses to declare the winner, you say pointing at the camera
joe- which will be me, he says pointing his up smiling
y/n- yeah ok, you say snorting out a laugh
and as you started the timer, you both wasted no time opening the box, pulling out the frosting, candies and of course the house
as you were assembling the house, carefully placing frosting on each piece and placing them together, making them stable, you looked over to joe and seen him already done preparing his house
it looked a little messy, frosting scraped on each piece, his hands and face and even the table, you turned away your attention and started decorating
putting the candies on the roof, tracing the window and door outline, putting little doodles of frosting on the wall, tracing the roof, and even putting little icicles on the edge of the roof
once you we're done with your house, you put frosting on your finger and put it on the tray where your gingerbread house was at to make it look like snow, you then opened you gingerbread man and started decorating him
giving him hair, a cute outfit and a silly face, you then place him in front of the house and as you turned to joes house, you saw him recreating the house on the box
although it was similar it was something, you were already done with your house so to kick some time you talked to chat, about how joe's house is ugly and how hes gonna lose and other stuff, like yours and his relationship and even vlogmas
and as joe was finally done with his house, it was time for chat to rate, you both held your house and it seems like chat loved your house, comments saying "y/n won" and "y/n"
and as joe was arguing with chat about his house, they rated your house mostly a 8 and they rated joe's house a 5
joe- my house is not a 5, he says defensive, "is it that bad?" he questions
you laugh and as chat was agreeing with him, chat made it clear that you won the challenge, you cheered and celebrated your victory
as chat and joe were arguing, you just sat there and observed
joe- i think we did a great job, he defends
you huff out a laugh and as joe sat up in his chair, he spoke
joe- did we do a good job? yes, am I gonna smash it? yes. he says lifting his fist up the air and connecting it to the house
gingerbread pieces flying everywhere, on the floor, table and even on your face, you were shocked, a startled laugh exited your body and joe said his outro like nothing happened
joe- well that's gonna be it for stream, he says, doing his outro, as he turned off the camera, a gingerbread mess everywhere, you just sat there in shocked
still replaying him smashing the house, as he grabbed the broom and dustpan cleaning his gingerbread mess while marley was trying to eat the gingerbread pieces off the floor
you were definitely gonna do this next year too
taglist
🏷️: @madisonb44r @mattsglassezx @courta13 @ghost4love @eyesonmattyb @japblogs @sturniszn @sturniolo423 @celestl4lore @catgirl-luca @lyingonchris @sturnsknowsbest @pepsipoet @crousome @sturnl0v3r @conspiracy-ash @breesturn @bft1996 @angel-sturn1 @whore4chris @missp0ssessivee
with kisses and a pretty face - 𝓐💋
Joe is probably one of the most realistic YouTubers out there, because I legit had the same reaction.
How i feel like I look when someone slightly attractive tries to interact with me
joe b. x asmr!youtuber!reader
a/n: this is so cringe but fucking whatever. can’t get these thoughts out of my head. FLUFF!! not proof read.
The Joe Special
You gleefully snapped photos of your new nail set that you got sent. The nails specially commissioned by you, from a fan who denied a big tip. They were sparkly press ons, tiny little pearls decorated soft pink coating that shined under the lights. You’d already finished up your makeup and wore a soft comfortable top. You wore sweatpants, not bothered to put on anything tight.
You took a seat at your dark honey desk. Your feet touched the boxes stuffed under the desk, plastic boxes filled with random items. Your desk too had random things, all pink. A pink fidget spinner from the days when they were cool, a hello-kitty hairbrush without a single hair stuck in it, clicky pens and many more items.
You set up your camera and ring light that gave your decorated face a soft warm glow. Pink sparkles danced on your face while you brought your microphone close to your lips. You’d been sponsored by the mic’s brand recently and you gladly promoted the fuck out of it. The mic quality was so crisp, your comments were always gushing at how they felt like they were sitting right next to you.
Pink nails danced against the table, then the mic. You did a double take over the settings before hitting the record button. You sat up in your office chair and started tapping. Whispering softly into the mic, calculated and smooth. Your fingers grazed the mic before you displayed your new set of nails.
“COME ON!” a shout startled the fuck out of you. You nearly fell out of your chair, clutching the collar of your shirt. Your eyes flicked to your phone, eyebrows knitting together. “Fuck!” followed afterward and you huffed. Your boyfriend said he wouldn’t stream until 5pm, it was 3pm. You pouted, quickly ending the recording. You made quick work of changing into a nice pair of jeans before slipping out of your recording room.
Joe was down at the end of the hall, which worked great. He was far away, his fits of “anger” and screaming didn’t reach your ears. Instead they were muffled… after you forced him to sound proof his walls when you moved in. Even then, you guys had a schedule. You had time to record early during the day and he had the evenings. It worked out perfectly but now… he’d fucked up the schedule.
You decided, if he wouldn’t let you record then you’d show your nails off to his chat. You fixed your shirt, your shoulders and chest slightly revealed. Then cracked the door open. Peaking inside, Joe was in the middle of a gaming stream it seemed. Something difficult obviously as he continued to snap back at his chat.
“You missed it,” Joe muttered, his eyes flicked towards his two monitors. “I missed what?” Joe asked, annoyed already, “dude don’t backseat game, especially if you’re not gonna FUCKING TELL ME WHAT I MISSED IN THE GAME!” he shouted. You bit back a laugh as you snuck inside. He seemed locked into the game, eyes glued to his screen. He clicked his mouse constantly, you imagined the furrow in between his brows already. You were inches away from his chat, your eyes flicked to his monitor where his chat was pulled up. The chat flow increased as you stared for a bit.
SHES BEHIND YOU
WHOSE THAT??
JOE BEHIND YOU
“I didn’t know you—“ you started to speak.
“AH!” Joe let out, his head whipping to meet you.
You repressed a smile as you stood to his left. “Don’t do that,” Joe’s voice was a half-whisper, but he seemed relived.
“Whats up?” Joe’s shoulders dropped, looking up at you expectantly. His headphones hung around his neck now. Your eyes flicked to his chat. Your name came up in chat, all caps with hearts.
“Chat, wanna see my nails?” you ignored Joe and moved closer to the camera. You leaned over his desk, hands sliding onto your thighs as you blinked sweetly.
An overwhelming amount of “YES”’s came through the chat. A couple no’s and questions of who you were. Joe cleared his throat, “oh shit,” Joe’s eyes were locked on his phone screen. You showed off your nails with a wide grin.
“Chat she’s mad at me,” he told his chat. “I forgot you wanted to record today,” he explained to you.
You hummed before turning to him. He received your nails inches away from his face. “Do you like them?” you asked. He took your hands into his, his thumb brushing against your skin.
He hummed, like he was thinking really hard about it. “Yeah, I like them more than the ones you had on last week,” he answered honestly. “It’s very you,” he added, that genuineness slipping up on stream.
His eyes flicked to the chat:
EWGROSS
AWWWW
HOW CUTE
Wha chat couldn’t see was Joe’s knee bumped against your leg. Warm skin against denim still sparked something in your chest. The subtle contact started when he’d stream with you ages ago, when you two weren’t official yet.
He smiled softly and looked back up at you. His smile dropped when you revealed one of your cheshire cat grins. Your hands dropped to your sides.
“You owe me an asmr video,” you told him and out came one of his dramatic groans. “No way,” he shook his head and peeled his eyes away from you. He rolled his eyes when chat agreed with him, “no chat, I’m not doing that, no way,” he said.
“Yes way,” you winked at him, “chat harass him until he says yes!” you demanded. A following of salutes and “YES MA’AM”s followed. “That’s what I like to see,” you nodded in approval.
“What the fuck,” Joe said lightly. He’d already let you paint his nails, he did a couple of those “my bf reviews my asmr triggers” tik toks, and makeup on stream. However doing an asmr video together had been something you’d asked months ago. He said he’d do it with you, but never managed to make time. Then you’d forgotten about it.
Now, you two were just playing it up for the sake of engagement and dramatics. Your nails combed through his hair while you read chat. His eyes flicked between you and chat.
“Okay if I did an asmr video, what would I even review?” he asked.
“The Joe Special,” you read out loud, “ooooh, I like the sound of that.”
“The Ironman helmet. Yeah, chat gives me ideas. If I say yes,” Joe coughed at the end and you pulled your hand away.
“Gamer Supps…” Joe then started his plug in for the product and you gave him a peck on the cheek before leaving the room.
You decided to take your dog on a walk instead, responded to some emails and did some chores you were saving for tomorrow. It was a fairly productive evening, minus the video recording. You’d washed off your makeup, done your skincare and changed into pj’s. Your bedside lamp lit the room while reading your latest book.
You hadn’t noticed your boyfriend was in the room until the mattress sank a bit. You blinked, shuffling followed and his arms were wrapped around your waist. The heat emitting off him always made you crawl towards him. Except for the days it was too much and you’d lightly kick him off you. Today, like most days, you welcomed him. Joe pulled himself closer to you, head resting on your stomach.
“Hi,” you looked down at him, his blonde hair was wet from the shower, droplets of water stained your shirt. “Hi,” he said back and you went back to reading. One hand held your book while the other was already combing through his dewy hair. Your nightly ritual. Calm in the busy world.
“I’m sorry about fucking up the schedule today,” Joe apologized, and you both knew it wasn’t a big deal. However for Joe it felt like a big deal, especially since it was his schedule. He made it to make your lives easier and he fucked it up.
“It’s okay, it happens,” you responded, your upper lip twitched upward. “Plus, I get The Joe Special coming out soon,” you added.
Joe turned his head to look up at you. Eyebrows shot up with a small grin on his face, “you’re not actually calling it that are you?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” you sang softly, “I kinda like it.”
2 weeks later, The Joe (Bartolozzi) Special was uploaded to your channel.

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Honest question, anyone here fw joe Bart?
Recently rewatched Joes fears to fathom stream and caught this
Every time I see a vid of someone meeting my celebrity crush I scroll so fast and start acting like an insecure girlfriend