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Tony: I live for two reasons.
Stephen: And that’d be?
Tony: I was born and I haven’t died yet.
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Y’all look who’s stanning the supreme family after Infinity War??
ME.
M to the goddamn E. ME.
[ Deciding on a babysitter for 2 year old Peter ]
Stephen: What are you going to do when Peter crawls onto the ceiling?
Steve: Reach up and grab him...? I’m pretty tall.
Stephen: The walls can be over 20 ft in this building.
Steve: He won’t even get on the ceiling with me around.
Natasha: ... I’ve actually found a better duo for the job.
[ Cue The Cloak of Levitation cradling baby Peter while DUM-E holds a milk bottle to Peter’s lips ]
Natasha: Applications are now closed.
Whatever you do, don't imagine...
- Stephen Strange creating a portal to take Tony all over the world for his birthday
- Peter coming with them
-They take cute family pictures and walk down cobblestone streets
-Peter hugs Tony and says "happy birthday Dad" before Stephen portals him home
- Tony and Stephen have a romantic dinner in Italy
-Don't you dare imagine them kissing by the sunset
-Don't you dare imagine them going back to a little rented cottage where they cuddle together
-Tony feels safe for the first time in forever
-Don't you dare imagine Tony falling asleep in Stephen's arms
-Right before he falls asleep Stephen whispers "Happy Birthday Tony"
Tony: Where are my fucking keys?
Stephen: Tony, Peter is here, you might wanna say that a little nicer.
Tony: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my fucking keys?
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Steve: [about Stephen] Who's eggs do you like better, his or mine? Huh?
Tony: Well, I like both eggs equally.
Steve: Oh, come on! Nobody likes two different kinds of eggs equally. You like one better than the other, and I wanna know which.
Tony: Well, what's the difference? Your eggs aren't here anymore, are they? You took your eggs and you left. Did you really expect me to never find new eggs?
Rhodey: [officiating at Tony and Stephen’s wedding] I have watched your childish rivalry turn grow into a childish courtship, and now I am proud to witness that childish courtship blossom into what will undoubtedly be a childish marriage.
Steve: Where’s Tony, Stephen?
Stephen: We just stepped out of the shower. He’ll be down in a minute.
Steve: Alright, listen, you guys can’t go- did you just say ‘we’?
Stephen: What?
Steve: Did you just say ‘we just stepped out of the shower’?
Stephen: I said ‘he’.
