#interlude 1

Oh no he's dead isn't he

Ishar holding back pain? What if he's the one causing it...

Oh you mustachioed motherfucker he is a nice old man don't you dare

Ala's a traitor!

Oh we're using Kelsier's name, nice

(This is me, writing reactions as I read, because why the fuck not. They're not complete, mature thoughts taken after I sit back and evaluate what I've read. Consider them as such)

You know, I'm making reading Worm harder on myself by doing this. :thinking_face: Or at least more prolonged.

“We don’t know how long he had been there.  Suspended in the air above the Atlantic Ocean.  On May twentieth, 1982, an ocean liner was crossing from Plymouth to Boston when a passenger spotted him.  He was naked, his arms to his sides, his long hair blowing in the wind as he stood in the sky, nearly a hundred feet above the gently cresting waves.  His skin and hair can only be described as a burnished gold.  With neither body hair nor clothes to cover him, it is said, he seemed almost artificial.

Scion! Everyone's favorite world-destroying genocidal golden freakshow!

“The golden age of the parahumans was thus short lived.  They were not the deific figures they had appeared to be.  Parahumans were, after all, people with powers, and people are flawed at their core.  Government agencies took a firmer hand, and state-” The television flicked off, and the screen went black, cutting the documentary off mid sentence.  Danny Hebert sighed and sat down on the bed, only to stand just a moment later and resume pacing.

While this is an important infodump, the 'character watching something on the TV' form of the infodump is probably the most... bland version of it, that's not just a David Weber style 'let's insert two pages on the history of hyperspace in the middle of this high speed chase scene' infodump.

It's fascinating worldbuilding, and it's always fucking hard to get it out, but this... not quite sure it works for me.

Also, Hi Danny!

Danny ran his hands through his hair, which was thinned enough at the top to be closer to baldness than not.  He liked to be the first to arrive at work, watching everyone arrive, having them know he was there for them.  So he usually went to bed early; he’d turn in at ten in the evening, give or take depending on what was on TV.  Only tonight, a little past midnight, he’d been disturbed from restless sleep when he had felt rather than heard the shutting of the back door of the house, just below his bedroom.  He had checked on his daughter, and he’d found her room empty.

It's 12:30 am! Do You Know Where You're Children Are?

Danny fucking doesn't! :rofl:

(I may have a bent sense of humor)

He had resigned himself to letting her reveal the details in her own time, but months had passed without any hints or clues being offered.

I can certainly see why 'Danny is a Shit Dad' is a take in the fandom, though most fics I've read thus far don't go quite that far.

Sure, he's not being a shit dad here, but he's definitely not winning father of the year here.

While it's good to give children their space, at some point you do need to push, and Danny is clearly not doing well with that.

Taylor hadn’t said as much aloud, but whatever had been going on had been mean, persistent and threatening enough that Emma, Taylor’s closest friend for years, had stopped spending time with her.  It galled him.

Danny's known Emma for probably as long as Taylor has, give or take. It should seem obvious to him, I think, but everyone has their blindspots, and Danny seems like he's been checked out - not really of his own will - for a while.

Like, based on what I've read so far, and what I've seen from discussions and in fanfic, the worm-verse sucks. It's all going to shit slowly, though Brockton Bay does in particular seem to be a particularly bad case of it.

But equally, there's just a lot of people who just don't really seem to be trying? Which, realistic, especially when it seems hopeless and pointless but I'm not sure it's entirely so likely people give up so damn hard.

And yeah, there are people trying, but honestly, the whole picture of the wormverse - I mean, there's clearly a reason why people call it 'grimdark' and 'grimderp' (if they're detractors)

And also, unreliable narrator and all, or at least 'narrator with a specific perspective' but when that's all we have, it's all we have to go on. Unreliabl/biased/etc narrator can only cover so many authorial and worldbuilding sins.

(Whether or not such sins actually are present here remains to be seen.)

 Danny Hebert felt a thrill of relief coupled with abject fear.  If he went downstairs to find his daughter, would he find her hurting or hurt?  Or would his presence make things worse, her own father seeing her at her most vulnerable after humiliation at the hands of bullies?  She had told him, in every way except articulating it aloud, that she didn’t want that.  She had pleaded with him, with body language and averted eye contact, unfinished sentences and things left unsaid, not to ask, not to push, not to see, when it came to the bullying.  He couldn’t say why, exactly.  Home was an escape from that, he’d suspected, and if he recognized the bullying, made it a reality here, maybe she wouldn’t have that relief from it.  Perhaps it was shame, that his daughter didn’t want him to see her like that, didn’t want to be that weak in front of him.  He really hoped that wasn’t the case.

Not that I don't understand why Danny doesn't push, and yeah, teenagers need their space to process shit on their own sometimes, but also, really, Danny, you need to make that effort.

I get it, I do, but fucking hell man.

 He was being cowardly, he thought, as if his clearing of his throat would give reality to his fears.

On the other hand, it is hard not to sympathize. He knows he needs to do better, but for so many reasons, he can't and won't and doesn't. He needs, wants to do better, and yet can't, at least not yet. And there's reasons why, both internally and externally and it hurts him to not, to see Taylor like this, but he's as trapped as anyone else.

It's a very workmanlike quality so far, writingwise, I think, but that's always something I tend to prefer. And even then, Wildbow does manage to evoke and imply a lot with that.

He was stopped by the smell of jam and toast.  She had made a late night snack.  It filled him with relief.  He couldn’t imagine his daughter, after being mugged, tormented or humiliated, coming home to have toast with jam as a snack.  Taylor was okay, or at least, okay enough to be left alone.

I mean, he (theoretically) knows his daughter well enough to say this with confidence, but eating after being tormented or humiliated could be a comfort thing.

Granted, Danny's not wrong here, and presumably he does know Taylor well enough, or did, for this to be a fair reading by him? Or are we meant to see it as an oversight from him, because clearly he doesn't know his daughter as well as he thought?

Relief became anger.  He was angry at Taylor, for making him worry, and then not even going out of her way to let him know she was okay.  He felt a smouldering resentment towards the city, for having neighborhoods and people he couldn’t trust his daughter to.  He hated the bullies that preyed on his daughter.  Underlying it all was frustration with himself.  Danny Hebert was the one person he could control in all of this, and Danny Hebert had failed to do anything that mattered.  He hadn’t gotten answers, hadn’t stopped the bullies, hadn’t protected his daughter.  Worst of all was the idea that this might have happened before, with him simply sleeping through it rather than laying awake.

Honestly, this whole interlude feels like it breaks several of the conventional rules of advice for writing - don't have a character spend too much time introspecting alone, don't infodump too much at once...

And yet, it works. Which both speaks to how... useless that conventional advice often proves to be, and how confident (justifably so) Wildbow was in this that he'd present us a big dump and then all the introspection character-work.

Then again, there's a target audience for both, which again brings us back to the issues with that advice.

He stopped himself from walking into his daughter’s room, from shouting at her and demanding answers, even if it was what he wanted, more than anything.  Where had she been, what had she been doing?  Was she hurt?  Who were these people that were tormenting her?  He knew that by confronting her and getting angry at her, he would do more harm than good, would threaten to sever any bond of trust they had forged between them. Danny’s father had been a powerful, heavyset man, and Danny hadn’t gotten any of those genes.  Danny had been a nerd when the term was still young in popular culture, stick thin, awkward, short sighted, glasses, bad fashion sense.  What he had inherited was his father’s famous temper.  It was quick to rise and startling in its intensity.  Unlike his father, Danny had only ever hit someone in anger twice, both times when he was much younger.  That said, just like his father, he could and would go off on tirades that would leave people shaking.  Danny had long viewed the moment he’d started to see himself as a man, an adult, to be the point in time where he had sworn to himself that he wouldn’t ever lose his temper with his family.  He wouldn’t pass that on to his child the way his father had to him.

What's that saying? "They fuck you up, your mom and dad, give you all their problems and then a few new ones" or something like that.

And here though, we have the reason why Danny isn't pushing. Why he's making a choice he knows is bad, because - especially right now - he's in no fit state to press her. And when he will be in a fit state, it probably won't be the right time anyway.

 Four years ago, he had lost his temper with Annette for the first time, breaking his oath to himself.  That had been the last time he had seen her.  Taylor hadn’t been there to see him shouting at her mother, but he was fairly certain she’d heard some of it.  It shamed him.

Broken people, break people. And Broken people aren't really in a great position to help other people who need it.

He would talk to Taylor in the morning.  Get an answer of some sort.

We worked so hard! Please read it and tell us what you think!