#incantations

what you must understand is that a lesbian is the most normal thing that i am. it goes downhill from there

i'm just like kathryn merteuil if she was working class and a reclusive loser

always a little uncomfortable when you want to talk about mary shelley's mathilda and people think you're talking about roald dahl's matilda

The incantations haunt me

i wanna

i'm slowly reconciling with the most horrible parts of my life so far. most horrible to date, anyway. some things have been easier to admit now. the things i've not ever been able to tell anyone about. the things i still think I won't ever say. the things that are starting to spill out. the things i want and the things i don't. the reasons why i want what i want. it's gruelling and it's hard. and it's painful to see the things i always feared would fall apart shatter in my hands before i can hold them. but i feel better this way. i feel better when i can be honest about it. about how scary it is.