#hypersexual problems

sighhhh

This is not the first time I’m realizing this. It’s just making me really upset now

all of my exes were the same

we’re all lovey-dovey for a few weeks .. everything is going well. And eventually they become my FP (favorite person)

they start using me for smth (it’s almost always sexual and since I’m hypersexual I always provide it, almost desperately because I think it’ll make them like me more) so , I become obsessed

and that means they either get disgusted or they start distancing themselves from me and then I get suicidal

and then they get a new partner because their poly and starts ignoring me

and then they break up with me.

and.. I usually attempt when they break up with me

it’s all the same I swear to god

sigh

I don’t know why I’m splitting now out of all times

I don’t even know why I’m complaining rn..

I might be having a episode

I HATE BEING LIKE THIS!! I NEVER ASKED TO HAVE THESE STUPID ASS DISORDERS

FUCK BPD AND BIPOLAR

FUUUUUCKK

I HATE MYSELFFJEJEJDJEN

( don’t worry I’ll be fine soon enough. im just being dramatic rn)

I'm polyamorous too and being aromantic makes it easier because what I expect in a friendship seems to be what people expect in a "romantic one." Romance doesn't exist for me. My expectations for a friend seems to be greater than most and thats okay, and if anything that has been better for me in the process of making friends.

Too bad I'm fraysexual and end up losing my attraction to most the people I meet once I actually get context of who they are as a person. My fraysexuality is a result of being jaded by humans being annoyingly predictable with their behavior.