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Ilya: Hollander and I are so close, we even share a toothbrush.
Shane: We WHAT?!
Omg but imagine a world where Shane (but not the relationship) gets outed a year or so after the cottage and the Metros decide to trade him because they don't want to deal with All That. And where he gets traded to is the Boston fucking Raiders because they've just lost their star center to fucking Ottawa of all the places in the world. So now their big grand beautiful plan is fucked because it's like
Shane texted Ilya if he would love him if he was a worm and Ilya didnβt reply fast enough so he turned into a worm out of spite π
he's trying to be loyal to me not roku city

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I can't be stopped (@ottawa--centaurs).
Everyone asks if Shane has thrown games for Ilya, but no one asks if Ilya has every thrown a game for Shane. The answer is obviously no, Shane would kill him for that but, canonically, only one of them has ever deliberately thrown a competition, and that is Ilya, at the All-Star Games in Tampa, letting children win against him.
If Shane had been racing those kids, he would have left them drowning in his wake. He would not throw a competition against even the cutest toddler in existence. If those kids want to win against Shane Hollander they can work for it just like Ilya Rosanov has to.
Sveta reading off Ilya's twitter: "If his dick slap his thigh when he walk, I shall listen when he talk." Now you posted this saying sheesh. With eighteen fucking android emojis
Ilya (drunk as hell, hasn't touched his phone all night) and Marley (also shitfaced but somehow gained free rein of Ilya's phone) *cackling uncontrollably*