#hommestuck

You sat on coarse sand that covered the beach, staring out into the horizon as the sky changed to bubblegum pink with the setting of the sun, being swallowed up by the sea.

Dirk sat beside you, legs crossed and one hand clutching yours. You gave him reassuring stroke of your thumb to the side of his hand, soothing the gem.

You and Dirk had only recently began dating, but you two already felt so close… Dirk's affection towards you probably helping quite a bit with that. Though the gem was often stoic and reserved, he was incredibly clingy - in an endearing way, of course! You… Knew of Dirk's past, not in its entirety, but enough - his name used to Spinel, but he had changed it after moving to Earth (new planet, new life, new him, and all that), he had been abandoned and left alone for thousands of years by an old friend of his and had attacked Roxy (a half human half gem friend of yours) thinking she was her. 

So, you understood Dirk's clinginess, his want to always be touching you in some way to make sure you were still there, his worry whenever you went out of his sight… He was still recovering, and anyone would have abandonment issues after that. 

Just thinking about it filled you with dread - thousands of years, all alone, waiting for someone who had no intention to come back - it chilled you to the core, while at the same time sparked a fiery anger inside you, at Pink Diamond, the one who abandoned Dirk in the first place.

Though, at the same time, you supposed that if none of this had happened, you would have never met Dirk. You and he had only been together for a short while, certainly, but he made you so happy. You built each other up and brought out the best in each other… You made peace with the thought that maybe… What happened to Dirk might have happened for a reason. Something akin to fate. Or perhaps that was just wishful thinking on your part.

Your gaze focused on your boyfriend, the way shadows cascaded across gis form, the glint of fading sunlight across his shades. He seemed… Oddly stiff. A trick of the light, perhaps, but still… Dirk was always stiff, as though he was always restraining himself, but this seemed different. Different in a small, unnoticeable way - at least, it would be to others.

But, you knew enough about Dirk to tell the difference by now.

"Penny for your thoughts?" You asked, giving the gem's hand a squeeze.

"Mmph." Dirk made a soft sound and shrugged, trying to look away into the middle distance. He looks gorgeous in the light of the sunset.

"C'mon, please?" You gave his hand another squeeze. "You know you can tell me anything. And remember what Roxy said? It's better to talk about how you feel than to keep it inside."

Dirk's lips pulled into a tight line, brows furrowing in thought, before sighing. He nodded, hanging his head slightly.

He sighed, before eventually speaking. "I've been… Researching human mates- er, couples," He corrected himself. "I've noticed a…. Concerning trend."

You furrowed your brows, quirking your head. "How so?"

You watched as Dirk's jaw clenched, his whole form tensing up. "So many couples… Just leave each other inevitably. It's statistically likely that most couples will separate at some point…" Dirk began to shake, baring his teeth.

Your eyes widened, leaning back slightly. "Dirk?"

"Why…?" The gem hissed, moving forward, seeming much bigger and more intimidating than he had only seconds before. "How could they just part like that, after everything they've been through? And for the most ridiculous reasons?"

You shrunk back, feeling oddly dwarfed by the pink gem. "I… I guess sometimes, relationships can be fleeting…? It's sad, but that's just how it is sometimes..."

Dirk's lips pulled into a tight frown, seemingly restraining himself. "Is that how it will be with us? Will you inevitably leave me? Just-... Just like-"

"No, of course not!" You reply immediately. "I never intended that!... I'm really happy with you, Dirk, and I don't want to let that go…"

You could hear as another growl built up in Dirk's throat. He reached forward, gripping your forearms - but his grip was gentle. It always was. He could never hurt you. He never wanted to hurt anyone again after…

You let out a squeak as Dirk pushed his weight onto you, your back landing onto the sand as the pink gem pressed his body against your own. The Spinel gem took your wrists in his hands, pinning them above your head.

"Still," Dirk said huskily, "I can't let you go, I can't even allow a chance of that happening. I… I want to fuse with you so badly, even if it's not possible. I need to make sure you're always with me, that you'll never ever leave me-"

"Dirk...?" You whimpered, cutting off the gem's possessive rambling.

Dirk looked down on you. You could see his eyes behind his shades, drinking you in. He suddenly launched forward, capturing your lips in a hungry kiss. He moaned softly as he tasted your lips on his own.