#hellotailor

Phew! I think this typeset took the most brain power because I had to translate a fic heavy with images as well as links to photos of actors and other media (a number of which have become dead in the years between) but I adore this fic since the day it was posted.

Had to track down age appropriate actor headshots (are some of them the exact ones? Uh, no, cause Internet Archive doesn't have a saved copy of the links) and ended up shoving them all into each movie section endnotes lol, and so so much QR codes+URLs.

But also I had to perform 3 exorcisms/deep cleaning on the printer cause it absolutely refused to emit any gosh darn magenta ink, so compounded frustration.

Richie Tozier: The Manchild Tour by @hellotailor​

The Manchild Grows Up: An interview with comedian Richie Tozier, November 2019.

“Everyone in this industry either has a pill habit, or they can’t hold a relationship together for more than two months," Tozier explains. "Or they spend 16 hours a day arguing with people on Twitter. Best case scenario is you find a way to be reasonably well-adjusted about your desperate need for strangers to laugh at you.”

a love song for schrödinger by patho With his own two eyes Carlos has observed a house that empirically doesn’t exist. He’s never seen a quantum particle, but his computer models and lab readouts reassure him of their presence. Cecil – lovely and wonderful and strange Cecil – is comforting and solid in every way…except in Carlos’ peripheral vision, when his edges waver as though the lack of direct observation has left him unsure of what shape he should be. It means absolutely nothing, to see a thing in Night Vale. Carlos/Cecil, 2k, T Note: achingly lovely

Easy Open by Helenish “So you and Hunt are a package deal these days,” Bryson says. “Uh,” Benji says, jerking his head up from his computer, ballpoint in his mouth. Benji/Ethan, 6k, M Note: i read this at least once a month and it’s just,, so wonderful

Four-Letter Words by idiopathicsmile  Prompt: "humiliation kink by way of compliment, Aziraphale gets Crowley hot and bothered by accusing him of goodness." Aziraphale/Crowley, 3k, M Note: i still remember getting the email notification for this one and being like “exactly what i want?? from one of my favourite writers??? what a concept”

and if sun comes by susiecarter Post-JL: Steppenwolf isn't interested in accepting defeat and walking away. Superman's proven that he's the key to conquering Earth, and Steppenwolf returns with a plan for how to deal with him. A plan that Bruce is able to throw a wrench into—but not without certain unintended consequences. Clark/Bruce, 30k, E Note: it’s involuntary soul-bonding and it’s so good it makes me want to cry

Richie Tozier: The Manchild Tour by hellotailor The Manchild Grows Up: An interview with comedian Richie Tozier, November 2019. “Everyone in this industry either has a pill habit, or they can’t hold a relationship together for more than two months," Tozier explains. "Or they spend 16 hours a day arguing with people on Twitter. Best case scenario is you find a way to be reasonably well-adjusted about your desperate need for strangers to laugh at you.” Richie/Eddie, 3k, T

In This Cold Heart by pineapplecrushface The future Richie sees while he's caught in the deadlights gives him a chance to save Eddie. In the year afterward, they both try to follow Stan's advice. Richie/Eddie, 16k, E

want to feel something again (won’t you help me) by susiecarter Damn, this chick just won't give up. Harley/Diana, 6k, M Note: this pairing seems like it shouldn’t work but then it just...does?? and it’s incredible?? and somehow everything i needed???

come into my parlour by arriviste  After the revolution failed, Grantaire became Enjolras's keeper. Enjolras/Grantaire, 8k, T

a tree that has not blossomed (yet) by susiecarter An accident involving a Kryptonian device meddled with by Lex Luthor sends Bruce forward, into a future that must not—cannot—be his own. Because sure, Clark's joined the Justice League. Clark's willing to work with Bruce to save the world. Clark's even forgiven him for what he once tried to do. But that doesn't mean they're going to—that doesn't make it plausible that they'd ever be—that they would get married. Clark/Bruce, 8k, T

there was no sacred place by firstaudrina It's in the moment between wishing and knowing that Lestat realizes the approaching figure is Louis. Lestat/Louis, 1k, Not Rated

afterparty (aftermath) by thingswithwings Tony's kissing everyone tonight, or at least everyone who'll let him. Bruce/Tony (+ with a little Tony/everyone), <1k, T

talk to me by theappleppielifestyle “I was offering to talk dirty to you so you’d stop thinking I was such a stick in the mud.” Tony considers. Steve’s from the 40s, he assumes dirty talk back then wasn’t as graphic as it is today. “Go ahead.” Steve cocks his head at him, lets his gaze linger on Tony’s mouth and the exposed collarbone before saying, “Sometimes when you’re doing tune-ups on your armour I think about stripping you out of it and fucking you against the desk in your workshop until you scream for me.” "Holy god," Tony hears himself say, and Steve grins before continuing. Steve/Tony, 1k, E

Convenient Husbands by Annie D "It's only temporary, right?" Dean says. "Just until you're healed up, and then we'll never have to see each other again. So what do you say, Castiel, do you want to marry me or not?" Dean/Cas, 39k, E

The Missionary Position by matchsticks Ethan and Benji have to pretend to be a married couple for a mission. Well, Ethan and Benji are already a married couple, but now they have to pretend to be pretending to be a married couple for a mission, and the rest of the team has to help them keep their secret. It'll definitely all work out fine. Probably. Hopefully. Benji/Ethan, 2k, T

whatever you ask by theappleppielifestyle Tony is temporarily cursed to answer any question truthfully. Steve/Tony, 1k, T

Perhaps It Is Everywhere by matchsticks_p Canon divergence: Poe and Finn crash land together on Jakku and don't get split up. Poe spends the next few days searching for his droid, attempting to save the galaxy, trying not to die of dehydration, and discovering that the newly-minted Finn (minted by me, Poe realizes over and over again, and it feels like a new revelation each time) carries a lot of bad habits from the First Order he has just defected. Finn/Poe, 4k, T

Leave My Body, Moving Up to Higher Ground by triedunture Castiel must take a new vessel to return to earth, so he strikes a deal with a woman who isn't as willing as Jimmy had been. But Dean's in a bad way and Leviathan needs to be smote, so what else can he do? Dean/Cas, 17k, E

Vae Victis by Elspethdixon "But you, Patroclus, you would not let me weep… You were always kind." Achilles/Patroclus, 3k, G

we should just kiss like real people do by theappleppielifestyle Hoodie-guy stops in front of Steve just as he snaps, “FINE, I want to bang Tony Stark like a screen door in a hurricane, could we drop it now?” “UM,” Sam says, loud enough that they both turn to look at him. He’s wide-eyed as he jerks his head meaningfully, gestures getting looser and more pointed as they continue not to get it. Steve stares at him. This is why Sam is never picked for a partner when they all play Charades. There’s a tap on his shoulder, and Steve turns to see Hoodie-guy smiling. Steve opens his mouth to say do you need something when he realizes why the man’s face is so familiar. “Hi,” says Tony Stark. Steve blurts the first thing he thinks. “Fuck.” Steve/Tony, 5k, T

Your semi-regular reminder that @hellotailor and I write/edit/curate a weekly fandom newsletter called The Rec Center! It comes out Friday afternoons.

We always include articles, things we loved on Tumblr/Twitter, fanart, and a fanfic rec list of 5-10 stories, from single fandoms and/or ships to multi-fandom and around a theme (er, sometimes even just a literal grab-bag). Gav and I write some of the recs, but we rely on our brilliant community of readers for the majority of them, and the variety is really delightful.

@hellotailor link is here (it’s like 2 hours long though). there is also some good stuff in there, but the second half is basically him lecturing two black people on The Way Things Are

@septembriseur A List:

“Racists are mentally ill” 

“Gay men and straight women should be each other’s closest allies because we share a lot of the same oppressions and experiences” which women who aren’t straight would know nothing about, of course--this was part of a larger discussion about AIDS, btw, which really makes it significantly more galling

Conservatives are the way they are because they are neurologically condemned to narcissism

irl lol at victor liking Blue, this is VERY ACCURATE

honestly the greatest cinematic moment of my life was when iron man 3 opened with “blue,” and everything else has been a disappointment since.