I think I hit beans or like realllyyy deep styro and I have no bandages rn andddd nothing to put on it but I am going out with a friend tmw and so I can prolly buy stuff with them, one like = one prayer ig 💔…im also so tempted to multi swipe it just for the love of the game 😭😿

does anyone else wanna get worse but also doesnt wanna upset their friends so they want to get better but also they dont. like this is mainly why i dont open up to anyone/even my closest friends bc i dont want to be seen as weak or like a bad person because im so self destructive, i literally dont wanna bring my problems into other peoples lives at all. i didnt tell anyone about my eating problems or abuse for 2 years because i was afraid people would hate that i wasnt the perfect little girl they imagined in their heads but also being 79 pounds (at almost 17) isnt normal. but also ive been self destructive since i was 13 its hard to just stop.

I cant complain, I do it to myself. I'm a bad person and I won't change. I'm too exhausted to try anymore.

People can say I've changed but i still feel like the 8 year old girl that would pray not to wake up again.