#gallaghercest

*Trying to do small talk with a gay incestous couple* So which one of you was more hang up on being related and which one was more hang up on being gay?

the reason i love oasis is because they are a walking, talking contradiction. like, they’re one of the biggest bands in the uk to the point they’re considered “overrated” and yet you cross the atlantic and suddenly no one has a clue who they are. they’re objectively ugly but also, somehow, devastatingly fit. they dress like blokes who got lost on the way to the off-licence and still ended up as fashion icons. they perform working-class authenticity despite having been multimillionaires for longer than they were ever poor. they’ve written songs that feel spiritually life-changing and they all sound exactly the same, with the same three chords rearranged and lightly plagiarised. none of them are technically exceptional musicians, yet noel is still a songwriting genius, and liam is considered one of the greatest frontmen of all time even though he just stands there like a statue for the entire gig and his voice went to shit after 2002. they are loud, uneducated, emotionally illiterate men but their songs have the most delicate and profound lyrics ever. they’re famously awful evil people, and yet free of any truly career-ending controversial allegations. they are rock’n’roll legends who live like bored middle-aged dads. they’re worshipped by hooligans and casual culture while putting out the most needy, homoerotic, emotionally codependent music known to man. they treated women appallingly and yet every ex still speaks of them with fondness, still a bit in love, and their kids absolutely adore them. and at the centre of it all are two brothers who despise each other, batter each other regularly, then snog with tongue and spend their entire discography circling the weirdly incestuous gravitational pull of their relationship. they’re massive bellends and i genuinely could not have chosen a better band to be obsessed with.