#entity writes dc

Character A: *ends up in a situation* okay this person is into some Stuff can someone do some research into bdsm or equivalent?

Character B: *cracks knuckles, no hesitation* well you see- *does an entire VERY specific spiel about the different aspects of bdsm* -and that's about the general idea.

Everyone:

Character A:

Character B:

Character A: *swallows thickly* so um. Any first hand experience?

Which brings up the very hilarious interaction of:

Alfred, staring at Stephanie flirting with Tim who's very obviously fond and looking up at her every now and then, but still continuing to code on his computer and missing the fact that Stephanie has managed to steal all 14 of his pens in the process: *sighs fondly* just like old times...

Bruce, surprised and looking over: oh? How so?

Tim and Stephanie looking up to see if they're about to hear another Snippet of the Life of Alfred: !!!

Alfred, still fond but a mile away: Ms. Brown reminds me of Martha more and more everyday...

I know it's not what some of you want to hear, but- despite the perfect savior concept of getting them into a batter family- that doesn't mean that

A. They even WANT to be 'saved' and

B. That they aren't doing a decent job at taking care of themselves

The thing about having independence at a young age, is that you learn pretty quickly at least the basics or you fail

If you make it too obvious while going to school (esp elementary but also middle), you will be caught

If you don't have a supply of food or the ability to make food, you will be caught (either by police or any adult) or very sick and THEN die or caught

If you change attitudes and routines completely and suddenly, you will be noticed and possibly caught

NEGLECTED KIDS WHO LAST MORE THAN A FEW DAYS KNOW THIS (even if subconsciously)

"Saving the poor baby" is good for children who are just recently out on their own (think a couple weeks, maybe a couple months if you stretch it)

But a couple years??? I'm sure a few children would like someone to take care of them but most of them (while also maybe yearning for the same) would rather not and I'll tell you three big reasons why:

Nobody noticed that they needed help when they truly needed it, regardless of the fact that they hid it with all their power, ergo others are not to be trusted because they do not care.

And/or

It has been like for as long as they remember and change that drastic is hard for any adult let alone a child to imagine.

And/or

They are perfectly capable of keeping themselves alive and do not need outside help (this can be a statement of truth, misleasing pride, or fear of change/other people)

"Wanting to save them" may result in anger at the idea that they are incompetent, especially if the child has been taking care of themselves for so long. Cause regardless of age, children have always been resilient and adaptable and capable.

Not every child will be saved from a bad situation and they know that. Children aren't stupid, and they aren't stupid to assume they can take care of themselves when so many have had to in the past and will have to in the future.

An Alternative:

Stop the narrative of "saving them" from such a terrible way of life (the only life they've known or have known for a long while).

Everyone looks around frantic and scared but also... not really... cause ya know... this happens like every Wayne gala? Like they had to sign a slip saying that Wayne Inc isn't liable for any injuries during a possible takeover cause the Board was tired of people sneaking in just to sue after being shot by Ozzie's umbrella gun (it was just a graze 🙄) (Bruce pays for them all anyway)

But! This time Damian was in his arms when he was taken hostage! Extra collateral! How tragic! He's just a poor boy ;(

The corners have shadows of course and next thing you know- through a series of odd instances that are totally irrelevant to the story (oh his other children must be so scared! Must have hid under the tables since no one saw them,, how terribly sad) -a few of Gotham's vigilantes show up to save the day! (Is it 9 already?)

Alas! a goon (he's new, he's blue, he'll shoot himself in the shoe 🎶) gets startled and almost shoots poor defenseless Damian Wayne and oh Bruce becomes a real papa bear and slams his fist into the goons face-

"No." He practically growls- which uh Brucie can growl? A spattering of confusion goes around the room before a laughing Red Hood can be heard after checking on the goon-

"Damn! Good job papi!"

Everyone in the room pauses.

Did the Red Hood... just call Brucie Wayne Papi? The Red Hood, the anti-hero of unknown age who just recently obtained the praise of the city for taking down the recent baddie with the Gotham sirens when all the other bats seemed to be out of town?

A million ideas pass through the thoughts of the elite in attendance.

A million thoughts pass through Jason who just realized what he said after seeing that Goon Lagoon lost his front teeth.

He looks to Nightwing and in state of panic they speak to each other in a way that only panicking siblings who can't speak can share-

'You done fucked up,' Dick seems to say with a twitch of his eyebrow.

'Obviously, you stupid idiot, but how do I fix it,' Jason responds practically psychically with a tilt of his head.

Dick just looks at him in pity, and with a shake of his head, he stares into his little brother's soul with the plan

-of course nobody else hears this conversation,, everyone in the room just watches the two vigilantes stare at each other weirdly for a few seconds (theyre on complete opposite sides of the room? There is not a single shred of subtle about them having a mental conversation even if nobody knows what it's about) before a look a pure absolute disgust reveals itself across Red Hood's masked face (he threw his helmet for fun earlier in the battle not important) before settling into a neutral stiffness.

Solemnly devastated, like he's about to go off to war and his Beau will be left behind to be cared for by his evil brother who will no doubt try to take advantage of his estate,,

or like a teenager being told by an acquaintance that they found their old elementary school YouTube account with videos of them role-playing with their Littlest Pet Shop animals,,

or like when a mother writes a 12k story for her fandom during her toddlers nap time only for the child not only to wake up before expected but also somehow spill applejuice all over her laptop (the one she's had since she was a teen) shorting it and deleting the story because she didn't press save on top of being morbidly tired from lack of sleep-

He looks up and says with clarity in his voice even if it's also filled with the verbal equivalent of eating 4 lemons raw and slow- peel and all,

"That's what I call him in bed."

Everyone in The Know takes psychic damage.

The elite in the crowd do little more than nod before moving on.

Bruce just smiles big and fake and pretends like he doesn't want to die.

Red Hood looks at his gun with wistfullness, while Nightwing does an unnecessary amount of acrobatics along the chandeliers above them just to land next to him and pat him on the shoulder.

Like, just cause Tim had parents that werent the best doesn't mean he wants another one lmao (his parents didnt die until 15ish and like obviously he should have an adult to supervise him but its old enough to be emancipated in some states for a reason- not everyone needs a parent) and Bruce very clearly at the time was not ready for another son so I think they should just be friends