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Team Comedy this year! [Link]

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DestinyTober24 Day 21! "Ensnare"
Ensnared, pinned, potayto potahto...
"Since when is it a crime to high-5 the giant hand statues? Pure luck that it moved on me-"
"Please keep him out of our space. We had an agreement about this."
Flyswatter mode activated.
"I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will."
—Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre
Destinytober24: Day 21 - Ensnare
Further adventures in bog slug ownership.
Link to Ao3 if you prefer to read it there
Eris Morn frowned as she stepped into the Gambit ready room on the Derelict.
It was quiet. The Derelict was never quiet. It was also dark.
She scanned her surroundings, her stolen Hive eyes giving her an advantage in the dark few other humans had, although they also could just as easily give away her position.
The floor was littered with small items. Shell casings. Eris picked one up and examined it. Unspent. A nearby ammunition crate lay on its side.

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"Meeting you, it seems, was no accident at all.. I think you had the whole thing planned."
Is this true?? Did you plan to ensnare my heart 🪝🪝🪝 - eUë
Doesn’t anybody ever get it right? Carrie!
Why won’t they remember I am Carrie Crane? Carrie!
Doesn't anybody think that I can hear? I hear
'Specially when I got them screaming in my ear, I hear
Everyday they mock me and push me around, 'til I drop
If I had a wish, God, I wish they'd stop
Charles Spurgeon's "Morning & Evening"
Devotions for May 14
MORNING
"He shall stand and feed in the strength of the Lord." - Micah 5:4
Christ's reign in his Church is that of a shepherd-king. He has supremacy, but it is the superiority of a wise and tender shepherd over his needy and loving flock; he commands and receives obedience, but it is the willing obedience of the well-cared-for sheep, rendered joyfully to their beloved Shepherd, whose voice they know so well. He rules by the force of love and the energy of goodness.
His reign is practical in its character. It is said, "He shall stand and feed." The great Head of the Church is actively engaged in providing for his people. He does not sit down upon the throne in empty state, or hold a sceptre without wielding it in government. No, he stands and feeds. The expression "feed," in the original, is like an analogous one in the Greek, which means to shepherdize, to do everything expected of a shepherd: to guide, to watch, to preserve, to restore, to tend, as well as to feed.
His reign is continual in its duration. It is said, "He shall stand and feed"; not "He shall feed now and then, and leave his position"; not, "He shall one day grant a revival, and then next day leave his Church to barrenness. " His eyes never slumber, and his hands never rest; his heart never ceases to beat with love, and his shoulders are never weary of carrying his people's burdens.
His reign is effectually powerful in its action; "He shall feed in the strength of Jehovah." Wherever Christ is, there is God; and whatever Christ does is the act of the Most High. Oh! it is a joyful truth to consider that he who stands to-day representing the interests of his people is very God of very God, to whom every knee shall bow. Happy are we who belong to such a shepherd, whose humanity communes with us, and whose divinity protects us. Let us worship and bow down before him as the people of his pasture.
EVENING
"Pull me out of the net that they have laid privily for me: for thou art my strength." - Psalm 31:4
Our spiritual foes are of the serpent's brood, and seek to ensnare us by subtlety. The prayer before us supposes the possibility of the believer being caught like a bird. So deftly does the fowler do his work, that simple ones are soon surrounded by the net. The text asks that even out of Satan's meshes the captive one may be delivered; this is a proper petition, and one which can be granted: from between the jaws of the lion, and out of the belly of hell, can eternal love rescue the saint. It may need a sharp pull to save a soul from the net of temptations, and a mighty pull to extricate a man from the snares of malicious cunning, but the Lord is equal to every emergency, and the most skilfully placed nets of the hunter shall never be able to hold his chosen ones. Woe unto those who are so clever at net laying; they who tempt others shall be destroyed themselves.
"For thou art my strength." What an inexpressible sweetness is to be found in these few words! How joyfully may we encounter toils, and how cheerfully may we endure sufferings, when we can lay hold upon celestial strength. Divine power will rend asunder all the toils of our enemies, confound their politics, and frustrate their knavish tricks; he is a happy man who has such matchless might engaged upon his side. Our own strength would be of little service when embarrassed in the nets of base cunning, but the Lord's strength is ever available; we have but to invoke it, and we shall find it near at hand. If by faith we are depending alone upon the strength of the mighty God of Israel, we may use our holy reliance as a plea in supplication.
"Lord, evermore thy face we seek: Tempted we are, and poor, and weak; Keep us with lowly hearts, and meek. Let us not fall. Let us not fall."