These past couple weeks have been a series of lasts. Today was my last softball game, yesterday was the last time I’ll ever work with one of my leads, and Sunday was the last beginning of a week I will spend working with the Walt Disney Company. Heck. Today was my last day playing in the parks as a cast member.
Let’s be honest: lasts suck. They truly do. Everyone gets all sad and emotional and logic and sense just bow out; they leave the building and you're left with illogical nonsense. For what other reason would you find yourself writing an emotional, nonsensical blog about finishing a journey you knew would end at a predetermined date? Why else would it be now that you realize time moves swiftly and its unforgiving hand has not chosen to forget you?
These questions are, indeed, rhetorical. They are not meant to be answered, but rather, simply considered. Human emotion and nature are funny things. They make logical sense when you take a big step back and think on them - on what they should do. However, they make zero sense when you are in the moment and all logical sense has abandoned ship, ne’er to return (or so it would seem).
I digress. Three days from now, the college program is over. My term will cease to exist in the current time; it will live on merely as a memory. It will live on much like my past experiences. It will become the past; it will no longer be my present. This is a frightening fact. Why? Because it means change, and change, no matter who you are or what you do for a living, is frightening. It’s downright scary. I am about to leave a home in which I have chosen to reside for the past 7 and a half months. I am about to leave the new friendships I have forged. I am about to leave a job I actually enjoy. I am about to leave new best friends - new best friends who have truly become my family. I am about to leave my college program. I am about to leave.
No matter how many times I say it between now and the actual moment in which I leave, I know I won’t believe it. These things take time to sink in. Heck, I still don’t believe I graduated from college, and yet my bachelors is sitting in my room up at my dad’s house.
Life is crazy. It’s what happens when you’re busy making other plans.
It goes on. It continues. The door over here in Anaheim is closing; the light fades away. I glance over to notice a faint shimmer from a window high above, knowing I just need a little boost to get myself through and moving toward my new journey.
Life begins now. Time waits for no one.