I'd just really like it if Sam had permanent sa injuries please. pelvic pain so bad that sex of any kind is excruciating and even hunger or gas or getting hard feel like being ripped apart. nerve damage that radiates. difficulty controlling his bladder that's made worse because of brain damage

and of course flashbacks and night terrors and panic attacks that feel like he's about to die

also wincest where Dean is mostly understanding and gentle and really tries. helps Sam with pelvic pt exercises and brings him a heating pad and makes sure his anxiety meds are refilled. but also regularly coerces Sam into letting him hit when they both know Sam will barely be able to walk after. for days. and occasionally slaps the shit out of him for resisting

I have realized I'm a little silly. I've been sitting here for ages saying that we need more SPN fics with physical disability in them, like, Jesus is there a serious lack of that... and yet at no point have i asked you all to contribute. So, that's what I'm soliciting this week. Disability headcanons. Both stuff they could feasibly have in canon (hearing loss Dean my beloved), and the completely divergent AUs you may have in your head. Just not mental illness/neurodivergence because a) we have loads of that, let's spread the focus to other stuff, and b) i already asked about that not that long ago.

- @schizosamwincester

I have literally so many thoughts on disability, especially regarding Sam. Thank you sm for asking me this.

Sam definitely is canonically a sufferer of chronic pain. We start with seeing his chronic migraines in season 1. Even though his migraines are caused by his psychic abilities, it’s still chronic pain. And anyone who’s had a migraine knows how that shit feels.

Sam in later seasons has chronic pain during and after the trials. I believe he also develops chronic fatigue syndrome around this time.

“I just feel like my battery can’t recharge,” He says after literally falling asleep at the breakfast table. All my chronically ill besties have been there.

Sometimes I headcanon that Sam has Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. His joints are always aching and popping in and out of place. His wounds take longer to heal. He’s constantly aching.

Also I like the idea of Sam having kidney disease because I have kidney disease and I like to project all my issues onto him. Sam doesn’t find out about his chronic kidney disease till he’s already stage 3b. He’d been ignoring the dark urine and flank pain for a long time (he figured he was just dehydrated, he didn’t think it was a big deal) but when Dean noticed his legs swelling up, he insisted on taking him to the doctor. Unfortunately, it progresses fast and Sam’s on dialysis and Dean punches a wall when he finds out he’s not a match as a kidney donor. 😈

Oooh! What if Sam had cyclic vomiting syndrome? Just every few weeks or months, he has a horrible bout of nausea where he’s vomiting his guts out for days and Dean just thinks he’s hungover or it’s food poisoning and gaslights Sam about it!! Or maybe it started as a teen and his dad thought he made himself sick on purpose to avoid going on hunts or training so John would make him train through the sickness anyway and Sam’s just woozy, barely able to point his gun at the bottle before he hurls in the dirt and John mutters something about how he shouldn’t have made himself sick and it pisses Sam off because he has no idea why he can’t stop vomiting every few weeks with seemingly no trigger.

I read this one fic that changed my brain chemistry forever and I haven’t been able to find it since reading it as a teen so if you know which fic I’m talking about, please send it my way. I think it was on fanfiction.net. Anyways, teenage Sam gets kidnapped by organ harvesters and they take his corneas and one of his kidneys and when Dean finds him chained up in his cell, he learns that Sam is blind and they have to deal with that after his rescue and it’s pretty awesome. I love blind Sam fics so very much. 😍😍😍

I also love any fic where Sam lands himself in a wheelchair. Ambulatory or full time. I just love it.

Dean, on the other hand strikes me as more of an IBS guy. Guy has GERD and chronic hemorrhoids. He lives on Tums and Pepto Bismol. He’s had ulcers, hernias, and refuses to get a colonoscopy even though he needs one.

I’m also into Dean losing a limb. Although I love me some good Samputation as well. I once wrote a 127 hours type fic about Sam. It was great. I should edit it so I can post it sometime. I messed up the tense like halfway through so I refuse to post it until that’s fixed.

To finish off, allow me to leave you with a few fics off the top of my head:

Sam gets terminal lung diagnosis after being tortured for a while

Teenage Samputation

One of the most grueling sick Sam fics and an all time fave

Sam suffers severe brain damage after the crash at the end of season 1 and Dean takes care of him.

For some reason I can’t find the blind Sam fics or the ao3 disabled Sam fics I thought I’d saved but there are more out there. But not enough. I need mooooore disabled Winchesters (but mostly Sam).

As someone who is disabled and a chronic pain sufferer and suffers from a lot of the conditions I spoke about above, I love giving my pain to Sam. It helps me detach from my pain and see my favorite character being strong and facing it and having tough days and still continuing to fight. It’s really healing to me. 💕

Summary: Sam has had a messed up leg from the day he's born. Turns out, not much changes. (A mild S1-S5 AU.)

Posted to archiveofourown HERE.

this is all I want for christmas

it would kill Sam, especially if he went from having a "normal" body to being ruineddamageddisabled and dependent on Dean overnight. especially especially if it was early seasons (sayyyyyy if he was gangraped by the Benders)

yoooooooooo I have face blindness. mine is relatively mild, but Sam's should be. profound.

he's lucky that most of the people in his life wear the same thing most days (for example... no one except a certain angel is wandering around in the summer in a tan trenchcoat)

but maybe that's what gets him. he's hidden it from Dean as it's progressed, but then one day Dean comes up to him in a fake law enforcement uniform and the amulet isn't visible and it really scares Sam (which of course scares Dean)

I have a very clear and distinct image of Dean twisting Sam's arm behind his back and telling him to say uncle but Sam says "you're gonna break my wrist!"

"so say uncle"

but Sam doesn't so Dean breaks it. Sam thinks about how the bones moved every time he jerks off forever and Dean probably thinks about it twice as much