Lua with her Uncle Cal
Happy 1st birthday Lua!
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Lua with her Uncle Cal
Happy 1st birthday Lua!
Via Crystal's IG, 30 October 2024

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Having a baby with Michael would include...
Michael ~ would be so excited to be a dad
âBabe, look at this.â Michael said, drawing your attention to a car seat in the middle aisle and you smiled to yourself at how excited he looked.Â
âItâs the top rated car seat with safety features, itâs easy for new parents and it looks fucking cool.â He rattled off, and you rubbed your hand on his back and scratched lightly, âLike a fucking spaceship turned into a car seat.â
âMichael, thatâs great and all but letâs keep looking. We still have under four months.â You said, and he chuckled as he turned to kiss your cheek. As he turned, his attention drifted to something else and he ducked past you to get to the strollers.
âBaby, what sort of stroller should we get? Should we plan ahead in case we want to have another?â He asked, and you laughed to yourself as he continued browsing throughout the aisle. You let him have his fun, knowing and being so grateful at how excited he was to be a father. You felt your phone ring in your bag and fished it out, looking at who was calling.
You took a step back as you answered,
âHi, is this Mrs. Clifford?â
âYes, this is her.â You answered, and Michael glanced at you but his gaze went back to the different baby items in front of him.
âI have the results of the gender test, do you want to know them now or would you want to wait? We can place it in an envelope -â
âNo, now. Definitely now.â You cut her off. You didnât mean to, but you were so excited. You pulled Michaelâs sleeve closer to you and put the phone on speaker.
âWell Mrs. Clifford, I am excited to tell you that itâs a girl.â She stated, and your feet left the ground as Michael lifted you into the air.
âA fucking girl!â Michael yelled, and you laughed as you tried your best to continue the phone call, but the lady just laughed and ended the call. He spun you around once more, squeezing you tightly as he murmured in your ear, âIâm going to be a girl dad.â
Other pregnancy things would include -Â
Countless food runs
Lots of cute clothes/toys/items from his favorite movies/shows/animes
Singing to the babyÂ
Lots of lazy days (he insists itâs important for you to rest)
Cozy vibes always. Big comfy blankets, cozy pajamas, cozy slippers
Movie marathons with snacks
Michael being so excited that as soon as you even found out you were pregnant, he was calling everyone in your lives
He'd plan everything
Him cooking for you
He'd figure out how to surprise you with a gift at every monument throughout your pregnancy
Michael r/s with his boys
Lucifer: Everyone thinks they hate each other or, at least, Michael hates him but no. He loves his little brother. Even when they were literally trying to kill each other. Lucifer and Michael have always been (and even still are at times) LuciferandMichael. They would be the ones to terrorize their little siblings together, and protect them. Michael loves his little brother, no matter what the old book says.
Raphael: They are best friends. Michael loves them with everything he has. Raphael and him were the two that went through Gabriel leaving and Lucifer falling. They only had each other for the longest of times. When Michael fell into the cage and felt Raphael die, not even Lucifer bothered him. It literally broke Michael in ways the cage could never. (Adam brought him back best he could)
Gabriel: That is his son. His baby boy. His little angel. He raised Gabriel from the moment he was created. Gabriel is his and his only. Michael got into a huge argument with Him about it. When Gabriel left, Michael had a terrifying moment where he thought Gabriel was dead. Thankfully, Michael had Grace-Bonding all four archangels together and found Gabriel in years time. He always kept an eye on him. When Gabriel âdiedâ he knew, just knew somewhere, that his son was ok.
The echo of mistakes - Michael Gray
please DO pretend that's michael, because it's the perfect gif.
tw: cheating, quite canon/ooc michael idk lmao, kinda smutty right when it starts, nothing explicit just kinda horny shit. i also dont remember how many shots got michael, so bare with me, also slight mentions of michael's trauma with the unmentionable, mentions of blood, also MAJOR dad!michael so.......... warning lmao
also, words in bold are for shock lmaoo #extra
word count: 1645
summary: Michael cheats and he doesn't know if Y/N knows. But their new born somehow knows.
masterlist
wanna be tagged? fill the form, sugar cake<3
Michael smiled, his lips on her neck, his hands on her hips. Messed up bodies, lost in the heat of each other's skin. Her hands pulling him closer by the shirt that was hanging loosely on his body, even if "closer" wasn't possible. The shirt cuffs were rolled on his arms, cold air hitting on his skin.
"Mickey," she moaned softly when his kisses traveled down her neck to her chest "I need you, baby, please."
"You do?" he smiled, his hands traveled to the zip on the back of her dress, "Where, love?" he asked, looking forward to hearing her talk dirty to him in that soft Italian accent she had. Looking forward to hearing how his name would sound on her lips when he marked her as his. His property.
"Just say the word, love, say what-"
The loud, piercing, and dreadful cry of a baby, coming from the apartment over them, forced Michael to stop. He froze. It was as if he had come back to his body.
Only, that he went back on time four months. That was the same thunderous sound he heard a few minutes before Polly rushed to his side, with a baby in her arms. Y/N's baby. His baby. His daughter.
When he saw she had his eyes, Michael knew he would lose every personal desire, and everything would become her. Not that he was against it, he would willingly give up everything he had if she asked him.
That baby... Michael never thought he would only need the laughter that would part from her lips as he kissed her cheeks repeatedly. He never thought he wouldn't mind waking up every two or three hours to feed his kid. He never thought he wouldn't mind having the urgent need to fall asleep, yet he walked up and down every hall, just to make her fall asleep.
Because everything was for her. Everything was her.
"Michael, it's okay. It's just my neighbour and her baby..." she murmured indifferently, while her lips kept on kissing his chest.
Her lips avoided his small and healed bullet wounds, and he pulled away.
Y/N never avoided them.
"No," he whispered, and regret began to weigh him down "no, no. No, no, no- I have to go."
He was going to be sick.
He felt the same shortness of air he felt when two weeks before the date he had marked in every calendar, he got the call:
"Michael, she's coming today," she breathed deeply, after cutting his 'hey, Mrs. Gray'.
"Ada? But she just called Tommy, her ship-"
"Rosie, she- she's coming. Today."
He had never run so damn fast. The three same boring blocks seemed endless, painful.
I can't miss this, he thought, I can not miss this.
He walked those streets with the shame burning in his chest, now them being five instead of three. The hole in his stomach only grew bigger, how did Isaiah do it? How could he ignore his wife and his little boy every Saturday, just like he had done, without feeling the shame and regret?
"You never cheat on the mother of your child, Michael," Polly said, "you never cheat on them. Because not seeing your child might not seem like the end of the world right now, but it is. And it will ruin you."
With every step he took, a tear followed. He thought he knew what guilt was like. He had killed a man, all those years ago. Of course, since it was... him... the situation was completely different. During his long nights, he would still feel his blood dripping from his nose, the thick and warm consistency covering his hands.
He knew what everyone would say. Tommy would just look at him, and go on with his life. Arthur would say some nonsense and talk about how it would go out the window in three weeks. John... John was dead, but he would be really disappointed. Ada would chase him down Watery Lane and Polly... he didn't even want to begin that thought.
But Y/N? He didn't know. He never knew what she would say next, even when he asked her out- man was he afraid. Would she say no? Would she say yes?
But most importantly, would she find out?
She couldn't find out.
She just- she couldn't.
He... He could do something... right? There was, clearly, something he could do...
The thought left his mind as his eyes spotted his black door. 318 Watery Lane and Archer Drive. He took out the key from his pocket and stared at his key chain.
R.E.G.
Roseline Emily Gray.
"You'll love your room," he whispered, as he was holding Rosie in his arms, in his room, with Y/N by his side with her eyes barely open, "You'll love it. It's a nice shade of brown, you know? The wooden floor has a carpet over it, you'll be able to crawl as much as you like. And don't you worry about falling, my love, because it's the most plushy carpet you'll ever have. And it's all yours. I am all yours, forever and always."
How many more times would he have the chance to open that door, with his key, before the house of cards he was building fell upon him?
He got inside, knowing he would throw up any minute now. He took off his shoes, the one that took him there. He noticed his belt, still unfastened and loose. He turned around, faced the mirror, and saw a hole in his shirt, he was missing a button- It was one of the many Y/N had broken on purpose and fixed wholeheartedly.
His mind and running thoughts overthrew him, and he sat down on the floor. Legs crossed, hands on his eyes, pressing his skin with self-hatred.
"For fuck's sakes." he left out a cry, trying not to wake Rosie up.
What the fuck was he supposed to do now?
"Mike? That's your nickname?" Y/N laughed and Michael looked down, a little bit embarrassed.
"Yeah, kinda. Everyone just... everyone just calls me Michael."
Michael never really had any special friends in the village, so he had no unique nickname, no special story- he was just an adopted kid, with a simple name, without many hobbies.
"What about sunshine?" she asked, her fingers playing in his palm.
They were walking back to her house, after the fifth date.
"Sunshine?" he asked, confused on why she would call him that.
"Yeah, it's special."
The nickname had something special, that was for sure.
"It's too special for my taste." he joked.
"But it isn't too special for you, it fits."
That became her nickname, sunshine. Because every time she smiled or laughed, Michael felt his chest beginning to warm up, like the first rays of sunlight warmed their faces during the holidays, when they left the house early in the morning to have breakfast together in the garden, silently as the snow shone, reflecting the sun.
The only thing that stopped Michael from crying more, was the cry of his daughter upstairs. As quickly as he could, he stood up, wiped his tears while walking to Rosie's room and when she saw him, she extended her arms, with red soaked eyes and a tired expression.
"Oh, come here, baby. Daddy is here," he whispered while taking his daughter in his arms.
One of his many talents, according to Y/N, was calming Rose. As soon as the baby was being held by him, she would fall asleep. It was magical, almost as if the baby was hypnotized.
"I can't believe this! All of my work during months on end, hours of labor... and you choose your father! This is betrayal, young lady."
"Oh, sunshine, it's just a phase. She will listen to you more than she will with me. And I'm sure she will love you more than anything else."
But of course, tonight was different.
Rosie started screaming as they've never heard before.
"Michael," Y/N's sleepy voice echoed "is she okay?"
Piercing, loud and unbreakable. It was almost impossible to believe that Rosie, Small Heath's calmest baby, could perform in such a way.
He breathed deeply, and his shaky voice told her she was fine.
"I think she's just hungry," he said.
But there was no way, no walk, no bottle, no hug, no song that could calm Rosie. Did she... did she know?
"Michael, give her to me, maybe I can do something..."
Y/N's voice took him out of his panicked mind, with a sleepy expression, one she had passed down on to Rose.
"No, no, I can. You are tired, I don't mind staying awake," he tried to assure her they would be fine, that he wouldn't care about the effort.
"How will I sleep if my daughter is screaming?" she smiled.
She walked up to him, kissed his chin, and grabbed Rosie in her arms. And, of course, much to Michael's disgrace, she stopped right there and then.
"Ah, you just needed some mama time, didn't you, little miss Gray?"
Michael's heart shrunk.
"Let's go to bed, Rosie. You must be tired from the show you just made your father go through." Y/N laughed slightly and began to walk away.
How much time would he have that daily image? His wife, his daughter. Both of his girls on their winter pajamas.
"Sunshine," Y/N turned around and faced him "are you coming?"
Michael felt his world crumbling. It was being hammered. And he was the one to blame.
"I..." he began to talk as he teared up, his eyes glued on his family.
"Michael, are you okay?" Y/N walked up to him and her hand rested on his cheek in a split second.
"I need to tell you something."
And he knew he would have to forget about enjoying sunbeams with her.
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Dadâs Gaming Buddy
Summary: Michael gives you a much needed break from new parenthood.Â
Word Count: ~600
And away, and away we go!
__
Michael could see the exhaustion on your face as you cradled your newborn son to your chest. His heart cracked at the way your head leaned back against the headboard of the bed, eyes closed, silent tears falling down your face. He wasnât stupid enough to ask if you were okay. He knew you werenât, and bringing attention to your tears would only make you cry harder.Â
âWhenâs the last time you slept?â he asked instead, his voice a soft whisper, as his fingers ran soothing runs up and down your arm.Â
Your lips barely moved as you whispered back âI donât know.â
âGive me a minute, okay?â You felt his lips press to the side of your head, then heard his retreating footsteps.Â
It could have been five seconds or five minutes, before the weight in your arms was lifted. âMmm, what are you doing?â you mumbled, making grabby hands for the baby, eyes still closed.
âShh, let me handle this.â
âIf he gets hungryâŠâ
âI got it. Get some sleep.â
âMikeâŠâ More tears fell as your voice became a whimper of guilt.
âShh, you have to take care of yourself too, babe. Let me handle this. Get your rest.â
Before you could protest more, he gave you another kiss, then left the bedroom, baby in tow. And you, too tired to fight, shifted down into a more comfortable position and let sleep wash over you.
When you awoke, you had no idea how long you had been asleep for, just that you finally felt well-rested for the first time in days. And with no sounds of the baby fussing, you let yourself indulge in taking a shower before going in search of your husband and son.
It didnât take long to find them, as you followed the sound of Michaelâs loud laugh to his gaming room. You cracked open the door, spotting Michael with his hands crossed behind his head as he laughed. A bottle sat perched safely away from his computer but still within arms reach. And your son was sound asleep in the baby sling Michael was wearing. Although as Michael continued to laugh, you heard the unmistakable little squeak from inside the sling, followed by Michaelâs gasp. âShh, no, stay asleep, Iâm sorry,â he hurriedly whispered as his hands dropped down to cradle the baby.Â
You smiled at the sight, stepping into the room, and deciding how to announce your arrival without scaring either of your boys. âOh, hey, Y/N!â you heard Calumâs voice say from the computerâs speakers.Â
âHey, guys,â you said, waving at the rest of the guys on the call with Michael, as your husband swiveled around in his chair to see you.Â
âHey, babe. Howâd you sleep?â Michael asked, reaching out a hand for you.
You grabbed his hand in yours, stepping closer to him. âPretty good. How long was I out?â
Michael fluttered his lips as he thought. âCouple hours I think? Iâm not really sure.â
âShit, little man must be starving. You shouldâve woken me up.â
Michael nodded his head at the bottle on his desk. âI took care of it.â
You smiled gratefully at him. âThank you,â you said, pressing a kiss to his forehead.
âYou donât need to thank me.â
âI know. But I really appreciate it. So what have my boys been up to?â
âJust playing some games with the guys.â
âAw, Daddyâs little gaming buddy, huh?â you cooed down at your son still asleep in the sling.
âMore like good luck charm,â Luke snorted.
âFor real. Havenât won a single game all afternoon,â Ashton chimed in. âWhy do I bother to do this again?â
âCuz weâre your only friends,â Calum grinned.
âFuck you,â Ashton laughed.
âSo, another round?â Michael asked, drumming his hands on his desk.
There were murmurs of begrudged agreement as you reached to take your son from Michael, but his hands swatted you away. âI need my gaming buddy, babe.â
âOkay. I guess Iâm gonna leave you boys to it then.â You gave Michael another quick kiss. âThank you.â
âAnytime, babe. Anytime.â
__
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Donât You Forget About Me
Calumâs been a dad for sixteen years now and itâs gotten easier in some regards. But itâs gotten a lot harder in other regards. When his eldest starts to push away from him, Calum realizes heâs got to make some choices for his family.Â
Dad!Cal, Gender-Neutral Reader (Non-binary parent described). Dad!sos (Luke, Michael, and Ashton).Â
CW: Thereâs like one (maybe two if you squint) steamy scene, but it like fades to black. So: Smut adjacent, so 18+ readers please!
Calum Hood Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Calum gets the last of the bags into the trunk of the car when he feels his phone buzz from his coat pocket. He takes note to check it once heâs inside the car and before he heads home. Closing the trunk and returning the cart, Calum takes a small moment to glance up to the cloudy skies. A few rainy days have been predicted in the forecast and while Calum had planned on taking the family up to the beach house, a weekend at home isnât a bad alternative.Â
His phone buzzes again and Calum digs out the device. Iâm making no progress. I donât know what else to say to them. I canât lose Ro.
Roslyn, the eldest, was growing distant. Calum hadnât been there to notice the beginning of it. But he did notice when he came home on a break between legs of the tour that Ro had done a 180. Once a child that couldnât be pried away from him was now barely speaking to him. They spoke to you, which was a relief. But they still hadnât opened up about what was bothering them.Â
It hurts. Calumâs flight got delayed several times over to the point he missed their opening night in the schoolâs play. He was there for every other showing and they said they understood, but Calum knew. The delay, no matter whoâs fault it was, hurt them. Calum had promised to always be there no matter what. And Ro, who he couldnât fault, believed them. Having a promise broken was no fun thing.Â
And there was you--in the middle trying to help Ro, get them to open up so maybe you could mediate. But Calum had told you time and time again that it was his mess to clean up. And he, again, couldnât fault you for trying. Twenty years together and sixteen married with kids, there was always going to be a part of you that fought to keep your family and work through whatever issues arose.
Iâm on my way home. Let them be. You wonât lose Ro. Itâs just going to take some time. Did you sign Yvonneâs permission slip for them to turn in on Monday?
Signed and made double sure she put it in her backpack. INSIDE a folder so she canât lose it.Â
Calum chuckles. Yvonneâs always had a little bit of trouble keeping track of things. Distracted sometimes because a lot is happening in her head, or at least thatâs the way sheâs described it to them. Sheâs still a good kid--decent grades though a lot of times they still get notes about Yvonne being chatty in class. A ball of compassion compressed into a ten year old as sheâs proudly noted her passion in life is saving animals. The trip to the local animal rescue is right up her alley and itâs imperative to keep that permission safe for her.Â
Weâll have to double check Sunday afternoon, just to make sure. And the field trip is scheduled for next Saturday?Â
Yes, next Saturday and No doubt weâll have to do a double check. The house has voted to order Chinese food for dinner. Do you want that or something different?
Thatâs fine with me. Itâs the last text he sends before walking back to the truck and slipping into the driver seat. He reclines his head into the headrest, exhaling hard. Roâs not six anymore. He can hug them and promise a solo trip to McDonalds for ice cream and the park for them to talk. He canât snap his fingers to fix their moods anymore. But he wished he hadnât hurt them--he wished the universe was kinder to him for his kidâs sake.Â
A small tear tracks down his cheek and he lets it track down his skin. It reminds him heâs human too, but a human with so much to fight for.Â
The house is alive, like usual, as he cracks open the door and pushes into it with a handful of grocery bags. Two sets of paws come clicking down the hallway to greet him and he greets each of the dogs. Heâs careful of their wagging tails and bodies as he walks down the foyer into the kitchen, setting the bags down on the floor next to the fridge.Â
You stand against the counter, phone to your ear, with the menu in the other hand. âYes, thatâs all.â When you spot Calum, you smile and push up to press a kiss to his cheek. He slides a hand around your waist to still you. He can faintly hear the voice on the other end confirming the price and estimated time itâll be ready to pick up. You thank them and then stretch up to kiss him properly.Â
âIâll pick it up. I tried to order it before youâd be home. But Yvonne needed help with some math homework.â
Calum nods. âItâs alright. You sure you donât want me to get it?â
âHi Dad!â Yvonne exclaims, feet thundering down the stairs.Â
Calum turns to the sound, smiling at Yvonne. âHi, sweetheart. Have a good day at school?â
She nods, reaching out for a hug and Calum happily obliges. He hoists her up, knowing these days wonât last much longer. But he hopes they last longer than heâs anticipating. He needs them to last longer. âI got a B on my Spanish quiz! But I swear the lights were going to drive me insane. Thereâs one in the classroom thatâs been flickering for a few days and I donât know when theyâre going to fix it.â
âIâm sorry about the distraction. ButIâm glad you got a B.â Calum sets her down and Yvonne grabs a water from the fridge before jetting back up the stairs. Calum watches her go, to make sure if she goes to the study room the door stays open. Which it does. âI have a couple more bags to get, and then we can grab the food.â
âWe?â
âYeah, yeah, we. Sue me for wanting to spend time with my spouse.â
You laugh, rubbing at his back. âAlright, fine. We. Iâll let Ro know weâre stepping out to get dinner so they keep an ear out for Yvonne at least.â Itâs with nods that you two separate. Though you do grab one of the grocery bags, noting it has the toilet paper and some hygiene products in it.Â
The stairs give a small creak as you climb up them. Yvonne sits at the table in the study room, feet dangling slightly as she reads over the papers in front of her. âAre you sure I have to do homework first?â she complains, noticing your shadow pass by the door.Â
âYes! But I can sweeten the deal with a popsicle if you promise not to make a mess,â you return as you backtrack and lean against the door molding.Â
âWhen have I ever not made a mess?â
âWhere are you at?â
âHalfway done with this first side of the worksheet for Earth Science.â
âFinish that first side and meet me in the kitchen for a mid-work break.â
âSweet,â she grins before diving back into the work.Â
Roâs door is shut mostly, but you still knock anyway. âYeah?â they call out but donât come to the door. You push it open a bit more to find the navy blue and gray bedspread rumbled at the foot of the bed. But they are sitting at the desk in the corner of their room. They smile a little at you. âHey.â
âHey. Dad and I are going to be leaving in twentyish minutes to pick up dinner. Are you okay to keep an eye out on Yvonne til we get back?â
They shrug, the gold chain Calum gave them clicking against the layers of other pieces of jewelry. Even though whatever is happening is going on, they still havenât taken that off. Which is a good sign. âYeah, itâs cool.â
You nod, looking down into the bag. And the words catch on your tongue but you remember Calumâs warning. Itâs just going to take time. âThanks, Ro.â
âOf course,â they give a nod and turn back to the computer before facing you again. âAlso, can you help me with something?â
You nod, stepping further into the room. Is Ro going to finally tell you whatâs going on? You try not to show that question and then watch them unlock their phone. You donât watch too intently until theyâre showing you a text message thread. âItâs from this girl--she just moved into town like a week ago. I-I donât know how to respond.â
Girl trouble--not what you anticipated. But you understand. âIâm not going to read anything thatâs going to scar me, am I?â you tease, gingerly holding onto the phone.Â
Ro laughs. âNo, god no. You think Iâd show my parent that kind of stuff?â
âHey, I just have to check.â
They give you an explanation that because Ro agreed to work in the guidance office, they give tours of the school to students who transfer in after the orientation. This particular girl complimented Roâs hair--an undercut they had to win you over on. Calum was more agreeable on it. And part of you was scared that if Ro didnât like it, theyâd be stuck growing that out for months with a very poor attitude about it. And it was less about shaving hair and more making sure Ro knew if they didnât like it, growing it out would be a tedious process. But thank all the stars that they did like it, especially the star the barber cut into it.Â
The girlâs compliment sparked an interest, you gather, listening to Roâs retelling and reading through the messages--they get a little flirty and itâs clear they both like each other. Though neither oneâs admitted just yet. Until you get to the last message from the girl--Claire, you think is her name--asked what Ro was doing this weekend.
âI mean, the most obvious thing to do is respond with the truth. A weekend at home with your lame parents. But awesome sister.â
Ro scoffs. âYou and Dad arenât lame. Older, yeah. But not lame.â You nod, listening as they continue. âBesides, it was supposed to be a family weekend and I-â They go quiet. A sigh leaves their lips and they flop onto their bed, face up and bouncing for a second.Â
âTell Claire--thatâs her name, right?â
âYes.â
âTell Claire the truth and if something does come up as a result, then something comes up and you, me, and your Dad can talk about it then.â
âAre you sure?â
âJust text the girl back. Youâve left her on read for twenty minutes now. Sheâs probably having a heart attack.â
Ro takes their phone back with a tiny smile. âYouâre sure?â
âI am as sure as I am your cennend.â You softly run a hand over the top of their head. âYour binder shipped, by the way. Should be here by Tuesday.â
Their grin breaks out even wider. âCan I wear it to school?â
âAfter we make sure it fits properly and that youâre comfortable in it and not definitely not during your P.E. block.âÂ
Ro nods, eagerly. âIâll break it in around the house.â
âSounds like a plan.â Their fingers fly across the screen and you watch for a moment. This is the Ro youâre used to. Happy, laughing about something.Â
When you return downstairs, Calumâs put away a fourth of the grocery. You fall in a steady rhythm around him, working together to put up the last of it. Calum takes the dogs out as you grab your shoes. âRo--weâre headed out now,â you call up the steps.Â
They pop their head over the railing giving you a thumbs up. âI will go down with the ship if need be.â
âHmm, maybe save yourself and your sister. The house ainât worth it.â
Yvonne pops out. âI didnât get my popsicle!â
You wave her down, grabbing a grape one from the box and wrap a paper towel around it. âStay in the kitchen until youâre done. If you make a mess, call for Ro, alright?â
âWhoâs that I see with a grape icy pole?â Calum booms, but you can hear the smile in his voice.
âI was told I could have it by a parental unit,â Yvonne laughs, pointing at you.
âI did say she could have it as a mid-work break. But she has to eat it in the kitchen.â
âAnd I have to call Ro if I make a mess to help me clean it up.â You and Yvonne nod at each, the signature on the dotted line of your verbal agreement.Â
Calum grabs the keys and the two of you exit the house. You go take the keys from him, but he holds them out of reach. âWhat are you trying to do?â Calum almost always drives when itâs the two of you.
 Ro didnât say that you couldnât tell Cal and normally you try to always make sure you have consent to pass along information like this. But if they do get asked on a date, you want to give Calum a heads up. Maybe it wonât fix whatâs going between them, but you definitely donât want it to get worse.Â
You need to drive because if you sit in the passenger seat, itâs going to eat you alive. Not that it hasnât already. And youâll see the weight of the confession on Calumâs faceâsomething youâre doubly not prepared to witness. âPlease just let me drive.â
And itâs the way your voice cracks in the plea that Calum nods, handing you the keys without a second that. He walks around to the passenger side door. Did Ro tell you something? And if so, how bad could it be to make you want to drive instead of him?
You readjust the seat a smidge, and when the car finally starts you immediately reach for the radio. âOkay, no, you need to talk to me,â Calum returns, turning the volume down but letting the radio stay on.Â
Down the driveway and out onto the street, you exhale. âRoâs talking to a girl and Iâm not sure if a dateâs going to happen. But they both really like each other..â
âFor this weekend?â
âI donât know,â you answer honestly, braking at the stop sign at end of the neighborhood.Â
âBut itâs--â Calum canât let his own feelings hinder Ro. Theyâre their own person. But it still stings. Thatâs his baby and theyâll always be that, even if they hate him. But he doesnât want Ro to hate him. âAnd what did you say?â
âI told them that if something happened as a result that the three of us would talk about it.â
Itâs a valid response. But it still doesnât completely take away the sting in Calumâs chest. Itâs not that Roâs growing up. Thatâs just par for the course as a parent. Itâs that part of Calum canât shake that Roâs pushing away from him. As worried as you were that you were losing Ro. Calum canât help but fear the same. And in some twisted way it was his fault, that he had an opportunity to take a behind the scenes approach in the music industry, but he couldnât take it. And sure it wouldâve meant being home more with his family but Calum still ached in some part for the road. Still ached to be on stage. And he hadnât been able to shake it, not then, not before the damage happened. But maybe now was the last time, maybe now he needed to refocus back onto his family.Â
âOkay,â Calum says softly. Because thatâs all there is to say.Â
âIâm sorry, Cal. I donât know--I didnât know what else to say.â
âNo, itâs not you. Itâs just theyâre not young anymore and now itâs like balancing my own feelings against whatâs best for them. Itâs just hard.â
âI wish I knew what was wrong. I know theyâre upset about the missed performance. But thereâs something more.â
Calum stares out of the front window, watching other cars turning left, or following alongside you down the street. âWe canât interrogate it out of them,â he states.Â
And heâs right. You two canât good cop bad cop Ro about it. But the waitâs horrible. All either one of you wanted to do was fix it. But until Ro opened up, thereâs nothing to be done. Maybe if Ro went on the date, it would help. Maybe. But it still scared Calum that it would get to a point where the divide between them was just too large to overcome.Â
In front of the restaurant, you finally turn to Calum. Heâs frozen, eyes partially widen and seemingly unfocused on anything in front of him. Gingerly, you take his hands, wrapping your fingers around his and squeezing lightly. âI have to do something,â he mutters. You canât tell if itâs for you or more to himself, but itâs chant like prayer crossing his lips.Â
âWeâll-weâll figure something out. We always do. They havenât taken the necklace off. Itâs a good sign.âÂ
Itâs a small nod, almost indiscernible, and Calum squeezes your fingers in return as well. âWe will.â
You take a minute, waiting for the slightly glazed look to finally pass from Calumâs eyes. He blinks, turning to face you. âIâm okay.â
âOkay--Iâll go get the food. You just chill out here.â
âIâd rather go inside with you.â
âWhatever youâd like,â you return. Calumâs hand is warm as you thread fingers together and walk inside.Â
The owner greets the two of you by name, a testament to how often your family orders from here. You and Calum moved into the neighborhood when Ro was five, already planning to expand the family, but still before confirming Yvonne as an addition. Since the move, you made it a tradition to at least order from the place every couple of weeks. Over time, the previous owners would see you and Calum pulling up and as you stepped through the door theyâd shout the total at you. Now the children of the previous owners have taken over and know you and Calum just as well.Â
âAt this point, you two should take over as owners.â
âI highly doubt we could run it as well as you could,â you return, laughing at the tease. Itâs only a few more minutes before your food is ready and you pay. Calum takes the bags before you can even put the card back into your wallet.Â
âMy hands ainât broke,â you tease, but make sure to hold the door open for him.Â
âAnd neither are mine.â
Inside the car, you turn to the passenger side seat. âWhat are you thinking?â
Truth be told, heâs not entirely sure what to think. âIâve gotta try something. But I donât want it to be materialistic, nor do I want them to feel like Iâm only trying to make up to them because theyâre angry.â
âMaybe--maybe you just need to tell them that you care. That you know theyâre hurt and youâre willing to listen to them whenever theyâre ready to talk so you two can actually work on a resolution. Itâs how weâve always done things and I think, given our two kids, weâve done pretty damn good at actually listening to them and getting their input on how to reach a solution. I donât know why weâd stop now.â
âYeah, but how do I do that? They barely talk to me.â
âMaybe you just gotta say your peace and move on. I think Roâs just working through a lot of difficult emotions right now. And itâs scary and it hurts to see them shut you out. But you canât kick in that door. And I donât want to make it worse, but if I gotta play ref for that conversation Iâll do it.â
âThank you, love,â Calum whispers, leaning into you and kissing you softly. âThank you for being there.â
âI meant what I said in my vows.â
The return back home is quiet, minus the soft whisper of the radio. Sure, Calum could make a big show, put his foot down. But thatâs never worked with Ro before and it most definitely wouldnât work now either. When they return home, Calum takes the food inside ahead of you. You donât say anything, having already noticed the resolve that set his face like stone. You shut the door behind you and catch him heading up the stairs. Though you didnât always rely on your religion all the time, you pray now in a soft whisper for the two of them--for your family.Â
The TV downstairs is on, and you spy Yvonne sitting criss crossed with both dogs surrounding her. You slip out of your shoes and walk behind the couch to kiss the top of her head. âGo get cleaned up before dinner please?â
âCan I get to the commercial break before I do that?â
âYes. Thank you for asking.â
âOf course,â she replies, grinning up at you from below.
Calum pauses outside of Roâs door. Itâs halfway open, most likely opened in case Yvonne needed anything. From his vantage point, he can just make out Ro sitting at their desk, half their screen a video and the other an opened word document. He knocks on the door on his exhaled breath. âRo?â he calls out softly.Â
They spin around in the chair. âYes?â
No âDadâ not even a full smile--Calum shouldâve expected it. But it still swings like a hammer against his chest. He continues on though. âCan I get two minutes of your time? And you donât have to respond. I just need to tell you something.â
Ro freezes for a moment. It hurts. He was supposed to be there. And they know itâs not his fault the flight got so far delayed. They know that. But that didnât take away the sting. And Ro didnât want to take the feelings out on him. They know itâs not right. He tried--he went to every show since the opening. He still cared even when they werenât the nicest. And sure, itâs easy to say thatâs what parents are supposed to do. But Roâs friends didnât have parents like theirs, didnât have parents that wanted to have productive conversations and not some sort of dictatorship. But it fucking sucks because all Ro wants is their Dad. Thatâs all theyâve ever wanted. And when they were younger it was different. They could go on trips more easily and Ro didnât feel like they were constantly choosing between friends and family. But now it feels like a fucking a choice and itâs easier to choose friends. Itâs easier to keep being angry because it means they donât have to choose again.Â
âTwo minutes?â they verify.
Calum nods, stepping into the room. He points over to the beanbag in the corner. âCan I sit?â
âYeah.âÂ
Pulling the bean bag closer to them, Calum tries to suppress the grunt that falls from his lips to settle down low. âJesus,â he huffs but settles down.Â
âDonât hurt yourself now.â
And though the slight jab comes out a little hot, thereâs a tiny smile on Roâs face. And Calum could cry right then and there. Roâs not gone--the sarcasm they learned from you still poking out from the surface. âIâll try not to, boss.â A silence settles as Calum tries to gather the right words. And while heâs always had a habit of shutting down and wanting to retreat, youâve broken part of that habit. And he certainly doesnât want his kids to get that from him. Itâs unproductive.Â
âI canât assume your feelings and take that assumption as fact. But I can tell by some recent behaviors that youâre hurting. I know I apologized. And I know that doesnât magically fix your feelings. But I can tell you itâs not fun to see you hurting and not knowing how to best go about reaching a resolution. I can tell you that I do want to fix it--whateverâs hurting you and especially if it was my absence on opening night.â Calum sniffles, trying to keep the tears as much as he can at bay. But also knowing that showing emotions isn't bad. He shouldnât run away from them. Even if he wants to keep strong for his kids, sometimes itâs just hard. âI will listen to you, whenever youâre ready to talk. And Iâm sorry, so fucking sorry that my choices and actions hurt you.â
Pinching his nose, Calum notices too, like you said, the necklace of hooking pinkies he gave Ro is still around their neck. With his clean hand, he holds up his pinkie. They did it all the time--promises not to tell you about ice cream before dinner, promises to take over the world, promises to save the world in all the imagined worlds Ro would create as a child, promises to stick it out with each other in blanket forts. And itâs a promise that Calum always meant and to do as much as within his control heâd do to keep them too.Â
Ro flicks their gaze up to the ceiling, eyes tearing up too. They believe him and heâs always done his best to listen and keep neutral and itâs not always easy, theyâre sure. But he tried. They hook their pinkie around his with a nod. Right now it hurts to talk about. And yeah, itâs not a pleasant feeling to know that he was hurting because of their actions. But like they had always been told each action has a reaction, each choice has a consequence. At least they werenât getting blamed--just an acknowledgement. Ro needed that kind of acknowledgment that others noticed they were hurting but didnât want them to hurt in silence.Â
Yvonneâs thunderous ascension up the stairs echoes about them. Ro speaks in a whisper. âI believe you, Dad. Iâll talk when Iâm ready.â
âThatâs all I can ask for, kid. Dinnerâs here. And if you feel like you canât eat with us, I understand.âÂ
Calum offers because maybe they both have a lot to process and forcing Ro to be at the dinner table could disrupt whatever progress they were making. Calum wants them at the dinner table but heâs not going to force them to be in an uncomfortable position. They have their own boundaries and he wants to respect them.Â
Itâs with another not fully suppressed grunt and with a bit of dramatics that Calum gets up and Ro snickers a little. âAy, alright, I get it. Pick on the old guy. You do punk jumps and see how well your knees hold up.â
Ro just shakes their head, biting down on their lip to hide the smile. âNot as bad as Uncle Mike though. So thereâs that for you.â
âDamn straight.â Calum takes a couple steps towards the door and pauses. âYou know I love you, right?â
âI know, Dad,â Ro answers.Â
âGood.â He exits, fully closing the door behind him. The stairs give a creak, undoubtedly as you ascend the stairs as well.
 Yvonne rushes past him and your voice carries down behind her. âYour foodâs at the bar countertop on a plate.â
Calum waits for you at the top of the second set of stairs, holding out a hand. You take in the tear tracks on his cheeks and the slightly red eyes. Itâs silent as the two of you shuffle into the master bedroom and you shut the door quietly behind you. âThey listened,â he starts softly. âBut they might eat dinner in their room. I think thatâs really all I can do right now.â
âYeah, weâll play it by ear. But thank fuck they were willing to listen. Do you want a cold compress? For the puffiness?â
âI got it. Head back to Yvonne. Iâll be down in a minute.â
For a moment you hesitate, hoping that heâs not shutting down. But you have to trust him. Cupping his cheeks, you kiss Calum gently. âLet me know if I can do anything.âÂ
âI will.â
Calum watches you slip back out of the room. He settles onto the edge of the bed, hands covering his face as he exhales again. Calum underestimated parenthood--and maybe everyone did until they were in it. Maybe no one really understands what it means to be a parent until youâre dealing with your child in waters you thought youâd crossed before, or waters deeper than anyone anticipated. He wouldnât trade this for anything else. Even though the gray hairs have multiplied faster than he can count them and though the house feels like a circus sometimes, thereâs no other place heâd rather be at in his life. A happy spouse whoâs just as willing as he is to do the hard work to raise their family and two children who were blooming into their own beings was a miracle to witness. But it was hard work.Â
Thunder rumbles overhead. The rain that wasnât predicted until night time will surely be sweeping in soon. In the stillness of the room, Calum promises to himself to be kinder. Not that he didnât think he wasnât kind already, but just in general. He needed just as much grace as his kids did sometimes.Â
Someone descends the stairs--heâs not sure who but just as quickly as they head down theyâre soon ascending back up. A door closes and Calum knows Ro decided to eat in their room. His chest aches just a little. But grace, but kindness, but allowing himself to feel the emotions and knowing that in the end itâs all going to be okay. It has to all be okay in the end, Calum thinks to himself on every inhaled breath.Â
It only feels like a few minutes that heâs been in the room. But when Calum walks down the stairs, he can see Yvonne already curled up on the couch with the dogs. Her dish in the sink and you sitting at the bar counter hardly touching your food. He grabs his food and moves onto the bar stool next to you, tucked at the end, near the wall. âYou okay?â he asks.Â
You nod, glancing up. âYeah, just not as hungry as I thought.â
Gently, he runs the back of his head over your forehead. But he doesnât feel a fever. He doesnât say anything else, just kisses your temple and turns back to his plate. The house feels eerily silent and you glance up to the stairs, wishing Ro would come down. But Calum gave them the offer not to and at this point, youâre not going to go back on his word. He did it for a reason, to respect boundaries.Â
 The thunder gets a bit louder in the soft hum of the TV, with a quick flash brightening the skies. The dogs make a little noise, and soon theyâll need some more attention to keep calm during the storm. âIâll clean the kitchen,â Calum volunteers after he finishes. âAnd Iâll put your leftovers in the fridge.â
You smile up at him. âThanks. Should we make sâmores tomorrow? Let today just be a relaxing day?â
âWe could.â
âDid I hear something about sâmores?â Yvonne pipes up.Â
âLater--you already got a popsicle before your dinner,â you call out in return. Â
âAh, man, really?â
âLovebug, later. Tomorrow, for sureâ
âOkay,â she huffs, setting back down into the cushions. âI finished my Earth Science and Math homework, by the way.â Her voice carries even from below the top of the sofa.Â
You sigh, looking to Calum for refuge, a degree of solace. He snickers just a little as he scrubs at the plate. Her attempt to bribe for the sâmores doesnât go unnoticed by him either. âDid you need me to repeat what I said?â
âNo. You said later on the sâmores. Tomorrow for sure. I just need the record to show that I tried.â
âRecord noted,â you chuckle. âGoing to get the shirts for the dogs and some flashlights just in case.â
Calum nods at your statement. A few moments go by before a plate clinks against the counter next to his almost gone stack. Ro stays at the edge of the counter, fingers twirling at the jewellry. âIâm not going to blow my top over a dish, you know?â Calum says, plopping it into the sink.Â
âIt still feels awkward, you know. Like when the stack is so low.â
âHmm, I getcha.â
âI-I sorta got asked on a date.â
âA date?â
âYeah. Itâs for next weekend.â
The confession surprises Calum. He was sure Ro would ask for something for this weekend based on what you said. And heâs shocked that theyâre telling him and not you. Heâs not sure if itâs progress or not, but he does his best to keep his chill. âDo I or Cennend know this person?â
âSheâs new in town. Her nameâs Claire. Is it okay? To go? On the date?â
âWhere is the date?â
âThe downtown center--to the movies and frozen yogurt. And maybe the bookstore--sheâs looking for this third installment in a series. And thereâs a bookstore downtown that always has got books when you canât find them anywhere else. The BlueCrab one, where we went and got those old school detective novels that I was reading over Christmas break?â
âI remember. You got your nose pierced in the tattoo and piercing shop in the same block.â
âHow I convinced the two of you to let me get my nose pierced Iâll never know.â
âI didnât tell you this. But the rebel streak is strong in both your parents. So we get it.â
âI didnât tell you this,â Ro starts. âBut I could tell.â
Calum smiles at the retort. âWhen is this date?â
âSaturday. The movie starts at 12:25 and is like two hours. But with the frozen yogurt and bookstore, we probably wouldnât get done until like 5? And I know I donât have my license yet. So either of you would have to drive me. So I wanted to make sure?â
The drain sucks down the soapy water and Calum wipes his hands clean. âYvonne has a field trip that same day and I think your Cennâs going with her. But Iâm not entirely certain--â
âDad, I donât hate you. Letâs just start with that. I appreciate you giving me my space and letting me know you still care and that you do acknowledge and want to fix whatâs happening. It just sucks, okay? It sucks that you have to go. Sometimes it feels like being angry is easier so I donât have to choose between my family or my friends.â Tears have started and Calum hands them a tissue, but gives them some space to speak. âThereâs so many emotions and so little of me, ya know?â
âI understand. Take your time.â
Taking a second to wipe under their nose, Ro continues. âThe best way I can describe it is like--I want you here and I want you to be there like the stupidest and smallest fucking things, like going on my first date or like when I ace a really hard test. Or when I, I donât know, do something stupid like climb a tree and fall out of it, breaking my arm. I want you there for every little thing. But I know itâs your job. So I donât hate you. Itâs just not easy. Itâs okay that you drive me next weekend. Itâs okay if you still want to call me kid, or whatever. Itâs okay that Iâm still your child. Because I want to be. I just donât want you to leave me, okay? Just donât leave and forget about me.â
Ro ends the speech by colliding into his chest and Calumâs quick to wrap them up tight. âRo,â he croaks out. âI think about you every second Iâm gone. I want to be here for everything too.â Heâs not sure if the words can fix the feelings. Heâs not sure how hard he hugs them is going to convince them that this family is his entire world. âI love you so fucking much,â he whispers to them. âI could never forget about you.â
______________
The winds no longer whistle outside the house. The storm caused the dogs a little anxiety but thankfully not a lot. And now, under the sheets, things feel relatively normal. Though Calumâs gone again. Something in his mind turning the gears over and over. Laying on your side, you just watch for a moment. Youâre not entirely sure what happened, having to go into the garage to gather the flashlights, extra batteries, and a few candles just in case. But when you returned, Ro was crying into Calumâs chest and he was crying even in his best attempts to console them. But whatever happened, it was definitely a good thing.Â
âCan I ask what youâre thinking?â you ask softly.Â
âOur contractâs up for renewal after this album.â You nod, already aware of this information. âMichaelâs been producing for a while and Iâve helped a few times. Itâs been a successful endeavour. Maybe itâs time I took a backseat to this whole business. Gave someone else the limelight.â
âIs that what you want to do?â
For Calum to be honest, he needs to admit that no--itâs not entirely what he wants. However, Calum does want parts of it. He wants more control back of his life. He wants to stay relevant in the music world. The guys have all vaguely wondered if they could negotiate a little bit of time off for their families too, of which there is a sufficient amount. But not what they all really want. And maybe nowâs the perfect time.Â
Calum lays on his side to face you, arm slinging over your waist. âIâm going to sleep on it. But I think, before itâs too late, I should be home more.â
âIâd like having you home more, for sure,â you tease.Â
Calum smiles, a small tuft of laughter escaping him. âOf course you would. Until we wind up with human baby three or somehow acquire fur baby three and then you will shun me.â
âI feel like a third pet could and would absolutely be either one of us just telling ourselves weâll go down to the shelter just to look and then walking out with another Duke type situation.â
âOkay, yeah I can agree with that. I donât know. Yvonneâs getting older. And before long Ro might be going off to college. I thought I wasnât missing a lot. But maybe I am. Ro basically thought I was forgetting about them, that somehow my leaving was going to cause them to just puff--not exist to me anymore. And I-I donât want them or Yvonne thinking that me leaving is somehow to escape them.â
âIf your track record proves anything, Calum, is that youâll do whatever you think is best. And I will be here by your side. I just donât want to cut off a piece of yourself. They need their father. But they need him whole. I need my husband whole. No matter what you choose, make sure that itâs not at an alarming detriment to yourself.â
The grip tightens around you and Calum pulls you into his chest. The kiss is slow, but deep as you gently trace your fingertips down his back. You pull away first to kiss the tip of his nose. âI love you,â he whispers.Â
âI love you.â
âTell me one good thing about your day,â he commands softly, noticing the fluttering of your eyelids.Â
âOne good thing about work is that I was able to pass along a manuscript approval to be adopted into a series. And one good thing here, now, is that my family is still as solid as ever. And thatâs all I could ever want.â
âWas it the one you were telling me about? The paranormal detective series with a love story subplot?â
âHmm, no, thatâs still on the table. It was one of Kyleâs picks. Steampunk adventure series.â
âYours will be next. All the other ones youâd given a yes on have been huge successes.â
âThank you, love.âÂ
With two kisses, one to each of your closed eyelids, Calum settles back into the pillows. Though heâs the one with the notorious habit of falling asleep in three seconds flat, he keeps awake long enough to see you settle deeply into your slumber. Thankfully, the steady rise and fall of your chest and ribs under his arm is enough to send him to sleep right behind you as well.
More rain greets you all when you awaken the next morning. Calumâs head is on your chest and youâre not even sure when the two of you managed to get into this position but you let him lay for a moment. And in the silence, running your fingers through the turning gray strands of the curls on his head, you find enough peace to slip back into sleep. Itâs not until you feel the bed dipping that you stir awake again. Some sun peeks out through the shades and Calumâs grabbing something from the bathroom before slipping through the door of the bedroom.Â
You figure he left to check on the dogs and sigh before turning to your back. âThose gears are still turning in that head of his.â
âI hear you talking about me,â Calum says upon his return.Â
âThose gears are smoking in that head of his.â You laugh when he walks to your side of the bed and lightly taps your thigh.Â
âYouâll regret that. And Iâll have you know, I went down to check on the dogs and see if Yvonne was awake. I think she stayed up late because sheâs still out like a sack of hammers.â
As Calum settles back into bed, shrugging off his robe, you reach out for him. âGood, means youâre mine for now,â you return.
âCorrection: I have always been yours.â
You settle onto his chest, enjoying the steady rhythm of his heart in your ears. âHmm, youâre right. Ro told you about the date, correct?â You got informed later but werenât sure if they told him or not.Â
âThey did. Iâm dropping them off and picking them up since youâll be on the trip with Yvonne--right? Youâre going on that trip?â
âI volunteered as a chaperone, yes. But Yvonneâs made sure that she is with her friends and not with me. So sheâll be running amuck on that poor farm.â
âWe should go back and do the horse riding again.â
âThat was fun. Beautiful to see the trees like that. But I really want to take them ATVing.â
âDo you think Yvonneâs old enough?â
âYeah. Câmon they make some models small enough for six year olds. At nearly 11, she can get on one. If we wait until we go to my parentsâ then I know for sure thereâs one good enough size for her.â
âWeâll ask them.â
âRemember the first time you met my parents and we went riding and you--â
âYeah, and I hit the mud spot. Not my most shining moment. But racing to the old general store was pretty fucking awesome.â
âVery illegal, because that was a highway we were on.â
âNot too worried about it, we didnât get caught.â
âIâm glad. The sheriff at that time wasnât too fond of my family. So that couldâve been bad for rockstar Calum Hood to wind up with a record over small town politics.â
Calum laughs a little. âWouldâve made me look badass though.â
âI think your management team at the time wouldâve kicked my ass for getting you into trouble like that.â
âThey couldâve tried.â
You sit up on your elbow. That was still early on in your relationship. Calum had been on tour and in a town not too far from where you grew up. When you told him that you had to go back home due to some emergency health concerns with your grandmother, he asked if he could stop by. Just to say hi and see you and if there was anything he could do to help. The band had a double show in the state and rather than leaving, they were up in a hotel. You and Calum hadnât even said âI love youâ to each other. But something about the relationship felt right.Â
So, you drove to him the morning after a show and picked him up from a hotel. You drove the forty-five minutes back to your home town and spent most of the day around in the more vibrant and built up downtown, but by about midafternoon, you asked if he was comfortable meeting your parents since he was already in town. You disguised it as you and some cousins already having prior plans to go riding once everyone was in town to which your parents would be there since it was their ATVs you all would be riding. You got there a day earlier to visit your grandmother--she was holding on okay at that point. But more of your family was coming into town and you knew the more people showed up the more your mother would ask you to help with cooking and hosting. So you needed to seize your window with Calum.Â
You hadnât expected him to be more than happy to meet them. Nor did you expect him to be eager to go riding. You figured heâd cite some excuse, needing to get back for rehearsals or some sort of meeting. Â
âWhy are you looking at me like that?â Calum asks, sitting up too.Â
âWhen you met my parents for the first time, it was about a week before my grandmother passed. We hadnât even really put a label on us and you talking like you had planned on marrying me in that second.â
âOh youâre so wrong. It was even before I left for the tour, like two days before or so. My mum called me, I swear like right, right before we were going to have sex. And I was going to ignore it. But you happened to see the contact name and made me fucking answer it. And you left the room! You went to the front of the old house with Duke and I couldâve sworn you were going to come back and check in a few minutes so I was trying to keep the conversation quick. But I spent forty-five minutes on the phone with my mom and you didnât interrupt me once. And thatâs when I knew.â
âIt was your mom, of course you were going to answer it. I did put on the TV and the Food Network was on so I lost track of time if Iâm honest.â
Calum giggles. âYou did seem invested. And when I came back to the front, we finished an episode before going back to the bedroom. And I was like, if I can have a full on facetime conversation with my mom, watch a cooking show and still want to sleep with them, Iâve found the one. So yeah, even if the sheriff found us that evening and wanted to arrest the lot of us. Management was going to have hell to pay if they were going to try and blame you for it or do anything else to you. Because I was not going to lose you.â
âI did not know that.â
âI knew that us being together was going to change me and I wanted it to change me. I wanted to be different in that moment with you.â
âYou sap,â you tease, quickly wiping under your eyes.Â
âYou can call me whatever,â Calum starts, maneuvering you to settle on his waist. âAs long as at the end of it Iâm still your husband.â
âTheyâll have to bury me before I stop saying that.â
_____________
Calum stands outside the closed bedroom door, keys dangling from his fingers. âRo--weâre going to be late, if we donât leave within the next two minutes.â
âIâm coming!â they return. Thankfully, you went through the outfits last night but now it seems Calum was going to get stuck with the need to perfect the hair. Though, they purposefully had the undercut lifted up higher on their last trip to the barber so they could still wear it down to hide it, but if they wore it up, it would be predominant. âBun okay?â
Ro steps out and the bunâs up high enough to show off the undercut. But just a hair messy. âI think it pairs well with the outfit,â Calum returns. Heâs learned not to say something just looks fine. That phrase in particular is bound to cause trouble.Â
âDo you have the money for the tickets and frozen yogurt?â
Ro pulls out their wallet from their pocket. âYes.â
âPhone and keys? The ring with your mace?â They pat pockets and pull out each item to verify that they have them. Calum nods. âOnward, if youâre ready?â
âReady. I think?â
Calum gently slings his arm around their shoulder. âThatâs a sign that youâre ready.â
The drive is mostly silent. Even though Ro and Calum have reached an understanding itâs still a little awkward. Calumâs still unsure if heâs going to move into a behind the scene role or if heâs going to continue with making his own music. But at the very least, while theyâre still recording the latest album Calum can make more choices to be home and be there for the small things. Like right now. Â
The silence is interrupted by Roâs voice. âWhat if I make a fool of myself?â
âYouâve been talking to Claire for weeks now in school. I think youâre going to be okay.â
âYeah, but thatâs school. Not a date.â
âWhat does she like?â
âDance, reading. Oh, she likes sea otters and Iâm hoping the bookstore has bookmarks and maybe animal themed ones. Sheâs really into crochet--like she made this little top. Itâs so cute it has sunflowers on it.â
âRo, I donât think you could make a fool of yourself. Youâve listened well to what she likes and you know whatâs happening in her life. So I think if you continue that trend, youâll be okay.â
They pull into a parking space of the movie theater and Ro turns to face him. âYou mean that?â
âI mean it. Now letâs go. Youâve got a hot date to get to.â
âDad--please do not.â
Calum nods. âConsider that noted.âÂ
Even on the walk to the ticket booth, Calum spots a girl with her mother. He shouldâve kept his glasses on, but heâs still not hugely fond of them unless necessary. They exchange parentsâ names, though Ro and Claire have made sure each parent already had the otherâs contact information. Calum tries not to smile at the little bit of awkward shuffle and dance Ro and Claire do before taking hands and getting into the line.
 âDonât you miss that stage?â Vanessa, Claireâ mom, jokes watching them too.Â
âAs much as I want to say yes, I think Iâm pretty glad to be past the awkwardness. I wasnât always as smooth as I thought I was being. So Iâm glad to be past that. But I will say, watching my kid be as awkward as I was is a relief. Means Iâve done something right,â Calum returns.Â
âI almost feel like I canât leave. Iâm more nervous than she is,â Vanessa confesses.Â
âMy secret--thereâs a music shop and a crystal shop nearby. I donât think Iâm leaving any time soon.â
âYou into crystals?â
âMy spouse is and I was given strict instructions on what to pick up. I just follow instructions. The music shop is where I can spend a few hours.â
âI originally had a similar plan. But our youngest is almost done with a field trip and my husband had an emergency at work so he canât get them.â
âThe trip to the local animal rescue?â Calum asks.
âYeah, howâd you know?â
âRoâs sister and my spouse went on that trip.â
Vanessa laughs just a little, more out of shock than amusement. âSmall world. Well, it makes me feel a little bit better that youâll be hanging around.â
âIf anything goes array, Iâll scoop them up and let you know. No worries.â
âThanks, Calum. Enjoy the music shop.â
âYouâre welcome, Vanessa.âÂ
He lets her head back to the car first and then catches one last look at Ro and Claire at the window, ordering tickets. He wonât leave his car parked in the spot. Heâll at least move it down further into the shopping center to hopefully conceal the fact that heâs been hanging around just in case they needed an emergency exit.Â
Just as he gets into the car, his phone rings. âI just dropped Ro off,â he answers, noticing your contact name lighting up his screen.Â
âDamn it. I wanted to give them a pep talk. But I got held up with lunch clean up.â
âYou probably wouldâve been better at the pep talk than me. But itâs kinda cute. Watching them--very much that first date nerves getting the best of both of them.â
âDid you meet Claireâs parents?â
âHer mom was there, Vanessa. Her dad had some sort of emergency at work. But thereâs a younger sibling who, like Iâm 99% sure, goes to the same school as Yvonne.â
âHuh, small world. Weâve got another hour here before the buses return. I want to be back by the time the movie ends.â
âDid you still want me to go to the crystal shop first then? I still have the list. But I thought it would take longer for the buses.â
âSo did I. But if you get to it first, thatâs fine. If not, then I can always go another time. Besides, Iâm also trying to account for traffic. So I canât even say for certain Iâll be back in time.âÂ
âWell, I donât want you to have to make a trip.â
âBut do you think Ro really wants to see the entire family after their first date?â
âIt would be the Hood way. But Iâll just go to the shop like we agreed. And if you get back earlier then maybe you, me and Yvonne can grab a couple slices of pizza for dinner. Thereâs a good pizzeria over here.â
âThat means weâd have to eat the leftovers tomorrow if we do that.â
âAye, aye captain.â
âLove you. See you soon.â
âLove you too.âÂ
Itâs not terribly hard to find everything youâve requested in the crystal shop. And part of Calum likes being here, even if youâre not here to answer his fifty thousand question. But it does remind him of you--the way youâd burn candles or incense for very specific reasons and tucked little spell jars into the childrenâs backpacks. They didnât always appreciate having to explain why they were there, but it was a small gesture that they appreciated.Â
Confident that he has everything, Calum checks out and starts towards the music shop a couple stores down. He doesnât really need anything. Heâs mostly here to waste time. The door chimes above head as Calum steps through. The young girl from the register greets him briefly before returning to the customer already preoccupying their attention. Calum knows he doesnât need a damn thing out of here. And though he likes to tease you about all the things you get suckered into buying, he gets it. Sometimes, things just speak to you. He starts at the front, looking at the various parts--from reeds to picks. He has plenty of picks though. But out of habit, he takes a look. He wonders if heâd have time to go to the vintage store about a block down as well.Â
He probably would, but if he goes and Ro finds out, there might be hell to pay as itâs one of their favorite stores. So heâll save it for later, another time--some other weekend or Calumâs pretty sure as the school year starts to wind down there will be some half days that he can scope both of them up from school to come back out.
Calum follows the side wall down to the back of the store. He passes cymbals and the banjo section of the wall before spotting the acoustic guitars. There are some pretty ones--one a deep blue with dark brown or maybe black accents. Oneâs a deep red that he nearly asks the associate to get down for him. But he stops, knowing that thereâs no way to sneak it into the house. Not that it was physically impossible but more like heâd tell on himself because heâd just have to show you.Â
Much like the time he tried to surprise you with a bass. After months of teaching you, you became obsessed with them and wanted at least one that was yours. The obsession isnât as strong as it once was, but itâs a nice feeling to share the love for the instrument. Calum spent weeks looking to see if he could commission one like the picture you found, a clear body with streaks of gold and other blue and purple jewel tones in it. It wasnât until he ventured into a vintage shop about four months from your birthday, that he spotted a few guitars on the wall. It didn't necessarily shock him to find them here, but he had combed through so many stores that he was nearing his backup plan.Â
But there it was--not quite like the one you wanted. A bass with a beautiful blue burst in the middle with white on the edges. It was a beauty that Calum couldn't leave behind. So he bought it and he had a plan to hide it away but the closer and closer he got back to his house the more he itched to show it. So much so that night, during a FaceTime call, Calum showed you the instrument.
 âBut itâs a birthday present that I totally didnât ruin by showing you now,â he warned.Â
And you laughed. Because of course he couldn't help himself. Of course, he was proud--so proud he just had to show it off. âI will pull my best surprised face. I promise.âÂ
Yeah, Calum could not and would not let himself ask to see any new guitar because there was no way heâd be able to not tell you.Â
âLook for anything in particular?â
Calum turns to the voice and smiles. He hadnât realized the previous customer had gone already. Maybe he really had been standing there for far too long. âNo, just looking. Thank you though.â
âOf course. Let me know if you need any help.â
âThanks again.âÂ
Calum does end up buying one thing, extra strings. Not that he absolutely needs them, but heâs in the mindset of having extra or spare around just in case. By the time he does his browsing, itâs just in time for the movie to have been over for at least twenty minutes. So he makes sure not to venture too close to the yogurt shop or the bookstore. Instead he wanders down to the shoe store.Â
His phone rings right as he gets to the door, so he stops short and lingers outside as he answers. âDate update?â
âLove,â he laughs, âI havenât got the slightest clue.â
âYouâre still in the shopping center, right?â
âYes, but I am purposefully avoiding the theater and bookstore. Because if Ro spots me, youâre going to have to ID me at the morgue. Do you want your dear old husband dead? And to have to bail out your eldest on a murder charge?â
âNot ideal.â In the background, Calum catches the distinct high pitch cacophony that must be the bus ride back. âWeâre headed back now. I suspect traffic will be the death of me.â
âIt wonât be that bad.â
âYouâre right, the thing thatâs going to kill me is the fact that our kids are growing up. What are we going to do?â
âCherish what we can,â Calum returns leaning into the brick column, staring down into the direction of the theater. He thinks he sees Ro and Claire exiting the frozen yogurt shop and heading towards the bookstore. But he canât be certain. One of them is wearing black pants and boots like Ro had on. But he curses his eyesight for going on him slowly.Â
âShit, I shouldâve gotten my glasses from the car,â he whispers, ducking his head. Any of his hats would give him away.
âRo?â
âTheyâre a ways off, but I canât see for sure.â
âHow did we go from ducking our parents to being the parents to hiding from our own kids?â
âAinât life got a sense of humor.â He looks up again and the coupleâs gone from his sight. He assumes theyâve gone inside the store. He keeps gaze for a moment or two longer for a moment he can almost imagine you here with him, undoubtedly tucked behind him but still peeking at as well. âHow far are you into the drive back?â
âTen, fifteen minutes. Still got a ways to go.â
âLooks like we canât play spy together this time. But maybe next time. I rather need your eyes--better than mine.â
âThatâs all you need of me? Just my eyes?â
Calum laughs, ducking his head again. âIâm not doing this knowing youâre a bus full of children. I will not be to blame for ruining them. But I will say thereâs more that I need of you than just your eyes. A lot more than just your eyes.â
âItâs my personality, isnât it?â
âI am hanging up now. I told you I wasnât going to play this game.â
With an indignant huff, you grumble into the receiver. âYou were a lot more fun when we were younger.â
âWhen we were younger, we didnât have kids, nor were we surrounded by them at every turn. But just because Iâm deciding not to play now doesnât mean I wonât play later.â
âOh, now thatâs what I like to hear,â you laugh. âWeâll probably get back just as you pick up Ro. And please know I am putting heavy air quotes around pick up.â
âI know you are. If you donât pass out on the couch before dinner, Iâll be sure to have a nice surprise for you in the room.â
âI am old and deserve naps.â
Calumâs laughter erupts from him, head throwing back with the sound just a little. âHave I told you I loved you today?â
âOnce or twice.â
âWell, that is severely lacking. I ought to be ashamed of myself.â
âWhatever shall you do?â
âHey, line.â
âI will back away from the line. I am backing away.â Then thereâs silence between for a beat, then two. Just as the sound of the kids starts to carry their conversation, you speak up again. âI missed you today.â
âWho? Me?â Calum takes a step forward to allow a group of people to pass by. âSomeone needs to check your temperature.â
âOh Iâm not sick. I just missed you. Ironic I know. I miss you when youâre the closest.â
âI think thatâs just a sign of the times--youâve had to get used to me leaving.â
âAnd Iâm not saying this because I want to sway your decision--not at all. Just meant it more along the lines of, itâs funny how things happen.â
âI think it might be time to retire the horse anyway. Iâve had a good run, but I do miss being home. Miss my family.â
âYou donât have to decide now.â
Itâll be easier. If Calum decides now, it wonât nag him later. It wonât haunt him either. âIf I drag my feet too much, Iâll never decide.â
You donât want to keep asking him if heâs sure. You donât doubt his decision, donât doubt the choice he makes. You donât want him to regret it. âYou can still break out the old horse every once and a while.â
âYeah, everyone once and a while.â
âHi, Mr. Hood.âÂ
You laugh just as Calum looks up to the voice. And thereâs Ro and Claire arm in arm. âI am totally not here. But hi Claire. Seriously though, Iâm actually not here. Itâs a mirage. Of me shopping but itâs all an illusion.â
âSomeoneâs busted,â you sing in his ear.Â
âYou are not helping,â he directs to you through the receiver.Â
âCall me back when youâre out of trouble.â You hang up first.Â
Calum takes a secondânoticing Ro hasnât actually given him a glare worthy of death. âWhoa, everything alright?âÂ
âThis guy kept following us in the bookstore,â Ro sighs. âI donât knowâwe tried ignoring him but it just felt weird. So we left.â
The truth of the matterâCalums always feared this. Heâs always known it could happen to Ro, no matter how the dress and it could happen to Yvonne too. And though heâs put them in self defense classes and done what he can, thereâs still nothing quite like it happening.Â
âIâm hereâalright. I know itâs lame or whatever. But I can play bodyguard,â Calum offers.Â
Ro laughs at his puffed out chest. âSorry Dad but youâre not Kevin. But thanks.â
âKevin?â Claire questions.Â
âOne the guys that does security for my dad and his band,â Ro explains.Â
âOh, yeah you did mention that. I forgot. Sorry.âÂ
Calum watches Ro, gently tug on Claireâs hand. A soft grin lifting their cheeks. âNo need to be sorry.âÂ
God, he could just melt at the sightâoverjoyed at Roâs tenderness. The moment lingers just a beat before Calum speaks up, âWell, I canât promise to be as intimidating as Kevin. But I can do whatever you two need me to do so you both feel safe.âÂ
The two glance at each other and then notice itâs a shoe store that theyâre standing in front of. Not exactly what they planned. âJust a browse?â Ro suggests.Â
âYou already call my shoes grandma shoes, so I donât want to hear anything,â Claire retorts.Â
Calum opens the door for them, but grins at the way they playfully bicker with each other. Ro mentions something about at least trying on a pair of boots like theirs. And Claire agrees, but the rest of it is lost as they venture deeper into the store. Calumâs browsing doesnât even last all that long. He looks in passing but eventually on a bench near the storeâs front window. He can see Ro and Claire in the back from this vantage point, but is far enough away to not be hovering.Â
Vanessa returns not too long after his text to her about the unfortunate run in and itâs not an easy goodbye for Ro or Claire. Though Calum suspects in no time flat, theyâll be texting each other again. âIâm a goner,â Ro admits quietly. They tuck themselves into Calumâs chest and he drapes an arm around their shoulder.Â
âUncle Mike is holding a pool party in a couple weeks. You should invite Claire,â Calum suggests. He usually does it before school lets out as they all make plans to travel during the summer if they can to visit family.
âYou sure itâs okay?â
âIf youâre as much of a goner as I can see you are, Michael can fight me on it.â
âBut two weeks is so long,â Ro complains. âI want to see her again.â
âSchoolâs on Monday.â
âEw to the school and learning part, but point taken about seeing Claire. We only share the same English class though and lunch period.â
âThere will be plenty of opportunities, sweetheart. Plenty of them.â
âThanks--for being there about that creep. I didnât want to get into anything unless necessary and Claireâs not big on confrontation.â
âWhat else are Dads for?â
âBuying pizza slices?â
âCennendâs gonna be pissed about the leftovers.â
âDid they get back with Yvonne yet?â
âNot that I know of.â
âWell what they donât know wonât kill them, yeah?â
Calum laughs, letting Ro pull him through the door. âYeah, but it might kill me.â
When Ro and Calum return home, thereâs no sign of you or Yvonne. Though just as they get through the door, Calum hears the crunch of tires on the driveway. He turns to spot Yvonne passed out in the back seat. He walks back down and waits for you to park and unlock the doors before opening the back passenger side door.Â
âShe partied hard with the animals,â you joke.Â
âI can see.â Calumâs quick to unbuckle her and the action only rouses her just a smidge, enough so that she wraps herself around Calum. âDate was a success minus a creep.â
âWhat happened?â you ask, grabbing your backpack and Yvonneâs bag too.Â
âThey were in the bookstore and some guy followed them. They basically just decided to leave and thatâs when they busted me in front of the shoe store.â
âAre they okay?â
âA little annoyed, but not terribly distressed,â Calum relays, stepping into the house as you keep the front door open.Â
âThat blows still.â
Calumâs hum is a sound of agreement as he starts to ascend the stairs, Yvonne still clinging to him. You rest the bags next to the stairs, only for a temporary reprieve. You spot Ro stretched out across the couch and walk over to them after closing the door and locking it. With a gentle tap to the bottom of their foot, you grin. âSo are you in love?â
âPlease stop, Cennend,â they groan but you can see the smile growing.Â
You place the back of your hand on your forehand with a dramatic sigh. âCenn, Claireâs favorite flower is a sunflower. Do you know any crystals that look like those? Cenn, should I get into crochet? Maybe knitting? Cenn, Claireâs allergic to seafood. So we can literally never eat it ever again.â
âI do not sound like that.â
âYouâre right. You donât sound exactly like that. But you did almost throw out your own crab legs. Which you wantedm a week ago because you found out Claireâs allergic.â
âFood allergies can be deadly.â
âLove, I adore you. But she wasnât at the house.â
Ro groans, throwing an arm over their face. âI know! Okay. I know. I told Dad I was a goner. And he said I should invite her over to Uncle Mikeâs pool party.â
âYou should. If you want. But thatâs the lot of your whole family here at least she has to meet.â
âYou think Uncle Mike, Luke, and Ashton will scare her off?â
âI donât think they will as much as the sheer number of cousins that will be over.â Michael and Luke only had three and two kids respectively. Ashton on the other hand had big plans holding the current lead for children at 5. One round of twins who were two years younger than Ro, two kids at 10 and 8, and another one at 6. It was sure to be a riot with all of them there. âAnd weâll have to make sure Michael knows about her food allergies sooner rather than later so he doesnât cook any that day.â
âI really like her, Cennend,â Ro confesses, sitting up and folding their legs beneath them.Â
You plop onto the couch in front of them. They fall forward, forehead resting on your thigh. âI see you do. And Iâm very happy for you.â
âIâll ask her if she wants to come over. But can you tell Uncle Mike now about her allergy.â
âYou have my word.â You shake their shoulder gently to get them to sit up and hook their pinkie around yours.Â
âThanks.â
âOf course.â
âAlso Claire says hi. And that sheâs sorry she missed meeting you today.â
âTell her weâll make up for lost time if she attends the pool party.â
Ro stretches up after you as you push up from the couch to head upstairs. You smell like a farm and would rather not sit in the stench any longer than you already have to. âNo baby photos.â
âOkay,â you return. âNo baby photos.â
âI donât like how you said that. What are you planning?â
âNothing--you said no baby photos. I simply agreed.â
Ro sighs as you ascend. You remember it all, or at least for the most part. You remember all the embarrassing things. Thereâs no need for the no pictures rule because you can still tell the stories. Their phone buzzes--a message from Claire and the frown that was pulling down their cheeks turns into a smile.Â
My parents said yes I can join the pool party!
In the master bedroom, you sigh, a relief to be back in your own home, when you hear the bedroom door creak open behind you. But you donât really turn to the sound as you head towards the attached bathroom. The water cascades down to the tile floors, the temperature starting to hit the sweet spot when you feel a presence behind you. âIs this later?â you ask, finally turning to face Calum.Â
His fingers settle around your waist, pulling you in for a kiss so soft youâre not sure itâs even a kiss. That is until he presses another one to your lips firmer this time. âYes, itâs later,â he whispers against your lips.Â
In return you slip a hand under the t-shirt and trace your nails across his sides. âGood.â The two of you share another kiss, fingers gently tracing skin and muscle. His shirt goes first, and yours follows soon after. Chest to chest, you let yourself be consumed by the warmth of him. How he ran so warm youâll never understand. But you revel in it at this moment as you share languid kisses with a bit of tongue.Â
Bottoms and under garments go next and without hardly a break in the kiss, Calum guides you towards the shower. âDonât break a hip,â he teases.
âDonât shatter a knee,â you return, but tug him inside as the steam billows out from the glass doors. Up against the tiles, with some of the water spraying the both of you, you take in the sight of his tattoos. âDo you know how much of a heartbreaker you are?âÂ
His lips seal around your neck for a moment, but he finally breaks away long enough to answer. âOh, love, is there something you want to tell me?â
âNot an actual one. Just your looks. Still give me damn butterflies. Like Iâm fucking teenager.â
His chuckle is breathy and tickles your neck. He straightens up, cupping your cheeks. âYou should see what you do to a room. I pale in comparison.â
You grip lightly at the hair at the nape of his neck, tugging him closer. And you swear that the salt and pepper will be the absolute death of you. âIâm a very lucky person to have you.â
âThen makes me the luckiest for you to choose me.â
âJust to lucky motherfuckers I guess.âÂ
Calum laughs as he leans in to kiss you again. âHell yeah we are.â
__________________
The sunâs not too high in the sky, but just overhead enough to make the concrete around Michaelâs pool warm to the bottom of your feet. Water drops from the glasses in your hands, landing on your toes and you appreciate the feeling knowing in another half an hour or so the sun will be reaching its peak. Youâre thankful for the shade brought on in part by the awning and umbrella you set up because you know you and sun usually get along but only in small doses. Calum smiles as you approach, taking one of the glasses from your hand and then pats the spot in front of him in the lounge chair.Â
You settle between his legs and recline into his chest, setting your drink on the side table. It settles with a soft clink. Most of the kids are in the pool. Ashton keeps close to his six year old and the older kids are playing in the middle with pool noodles. The eldest of the kids are sitting on the edge or floating on various animals. Ro opted for a bat and Claire stays close by them in her donut.Â
Michaelâs been manning the music for now. Soon he and Calum will take over grilling duties as you man the DJ station for lunch. Lukeâs happy to tend to the bar--an assortment of alcohol and juices. With a pile of water sitting on ice too--every household brought a package of the bottle water because they know itâs an all day affair.Â
âLook at the love birds,â Lukeâs wife teases as she settles into the lounge chair next to you too.Â
Itâs no secret you and Calum are the most physically affectionate in the group in private. Though you two have a line you donât cross in public. But itâs not an uncommon sight for you to be drifting in circles close to each other, if not standing exactly next to each other. You just like to be close, knowing that both your social batteries can be short and itâs easier just to stick together. Others have described it like between the opposite ends of a magnet. No matter how far apart, theyâll always be drawn to each other.Â
âTweet, tweet,â Calum jokes.Â
âI meant Ro and Claire, but yes, you two too, I guess.â
You laugh, a small snort escaping you. Though you donât fault Calum. âWeâre just setting an example.â
âI will never understand the way you two can be so calm about this. Luke almost had a heart attack when Bryce talked about a girl he liked. Just talked. Never mentioned a date or anything.â
âOh I almost shit my pants,â Calum returns. âBut itâs Roâs life. They gotta live it for them. On their first date, I didnât leave the shopping center. It was what--movies and frozen yogurt?â he addresses you.
âAnd the bookstore,â you add on.Â
âYeah--I mean, Roâs done something like that a thousand times with their friends. But I just--I had to be around at the very least.â
âSo itâs a facade?â she laughs around a sip of her water.Â
âPartially, if Iâm going to be honest.â
A momentâs silence falls around the three of you before she speaks back up, âWhen did they grow up? I swear it was just yesterday we were chasing them around in their little floaties.â
You hum at the notion. In some ways, itâs good that itâs happening faster than you can keep up with. That you had to take moments like this to step back and watch just how far youâve come. Being in the thick of it, in the trenches, was always a hard time. But having a moment to think that you wanted more time meant that some of the good days had come into your life. That you managed to have more good days than bad ones. That was something you could be proud of. Something you could pat yourself on the back about.Â
âYou canât catch me!â You look to the left to see Ashton chasing after his littlest one, Cymelle. And itâs not quite a real chase, but she speeds past the three of you with all her might, wrapped in her towel and goggles pushed up on her head.Â
âA real cheetah on land,â Ashton laughs.Â
âUnlike her pops,â you chime in.Â
âYou talking a lot sh-crap there,â he calls in return. âBut I see you havenât added any new babies into the Hood household.â
âTwoâs enough.â
âDaddy, can I get juice?â
Ashton looks up to see Cymelle in Lukeâs arm. âWater, sweetheart. You can get juice with lunch, okay?â
She pouts for a second but then Luke drops a tiny umbrella into the cup for her and she smiles. âIâm fancy!â she cheers, carefully taking the cup in both hands.Â
âThe sight of Luke with a baby is almost enough for me to reconsider my position on no more kids,â his wife says. Itâs to no one in particular. Just a thought said out loud. âBut thereâs no space. Between the studio, the office, and the playroom--Iâm not looking to revamp any of those into another room for a child.â
âDid you finish those kitchen renovations yet?â Calum asks.Â
She shakes her head. âNo, the new fridge that we ordered was backordered. And we knew that going in, which is why we did the counters, light fixtures, and backsplash first since it was going to take us longer to do that and then we could add the new appliances. But I didnât anticipate the fridge taking this long. It does give us some space to clean out a corner in the garage for the old fridge. I donât think weâre going to get rid of it.â
âNot until it croaks,â you laugh.Â
âLuke wants to toss it, but I keep telling him we can put it in the garage and when the kids are in the backyard. Rather than tracking all the way from the backdoor into the kitchen, they can just use that side door and get water or whatever from that second fridge.â
Ashton chuckles. âSuch riveting conversation--man, getting old ainât for the weak thatâs for sure.â
âNot quite our old smoke sessions in my background,â Calum chimes in. âBut I think we did alright, yeah?â
Ashton casts Calum a small smile. âYeah we did alright for a couple guys unsure of everything in life, besides life was what we were living.â
They share a long glance and Ashton speaks up first. âI could use some help on a side project.â
âMate, I am not helping you with your deck again. I refuse,â Calum laughs. That was hell. The first cut Ashton made in the planks was only measured once and way too short. The saw then died soon after and getting a new one took going to three different hardware stores. The second Ashton talks about doing any sort of home project Calum hides.Â
âNo, no, I donât mean a house project. I mean after this album--I got something else I want to work on. Need a producer I trust.â
Calum freezes underneath you and you turn to look up at him from the gap in your sunglasses and your face. The shock is clear as his mouth hangs open just slightly and his own brows raise above his sunnies as well. âYeah, I mean-- of course, man.â
Ashton looks back out to the pool for a second. The kids have floated more towards the middle. Their laughter cuts above the fade out of one track into the other. He turns back to Calum. âI think, too, the roadâs getting real rough to be on. So dabbling on the side would be nice.â
Calum didnât think he was the only one getting tired of the road but still loving it. But he didnât think others were thinking more seriously about settling down. The conversations always felt like they occurred in the future tense, in a âweâll settle down for real eventuallyâ sort of way. âWe-we should talk to Luke and Michael though.â
âOf course, yeah. Itâs just--itâs strange. I want to be home more, ya know. Want to tuck my kids in at night. And not that I didnât want it before. But I want it more now than ever.â
Calum looks at Ro. They get tipped over with a shriek but pop back up to the surface in hardly a blink. âJeremy--youâre dead,â they point out to one of Ashtonâs twins. âAnd donât think for a second I wonât murder you either Bryce.â
What happens if Ro needs Calum and heâs doing another late night in the studio with a project? What if he misses their graduation? He finds Yvonne sitting on the edge of the pool laughing with Anderson, Lukeâs second, and with Shelby, Jasmine, and Kaden, Michaelâs trio. What if he missed Yvonneâs first crush? Or something important to her? What would it all mean if Calum missed the important things for his family?Â
âNo, I get you, Ashton,â he replies eventually. âI totally get you.â
âMaybe youâll write that book of poetry too,â Ashton tacks on. âShit, we could do a lot more with our time.â
Calum wasnât ever really serious about the poetry, but it always intrigued him. So he kept it on the back burner, far enough out of reach that he didnât feel committed to it, but close enough that if he wanted to do something about it he could. âYeah, maybe.â
But more importantly, Calum would always be home for dinner. For a cuddle with the dogs and movie nights. Heâd be there for promâs and all sorts of school dances. Heâd be there for more dates between Ro and Claire. And heâd be there to hover on Yvonneâs first date and heâd be there. As simple and un-eloquent as the thought really is--Calum could be here with his family. Â
The thought fills his chest with warmth and he squeezes at your waist. âCan that really be my life?â he whispers into your ear. âCould I really just be Dad to my kids?â
âYou already are. But whatever you want, it can be real.â
âI want to be home. I want to watch them grow up while I still can.â
You attempt a shrug, but itâs hard with the tightening hold. âThen itâs yours. Watch them grow up.â
Michael steps through the backdoors, hollering as he does, âWho wants hot dogs?â
A cheer erupts from the kids and even Luke joins in, still holding Cymelle. Calum kisses your shoulder and the both of you stand from the lounge chair. You grab your lemonade ready to take over as DJ and Calum grabs his glass, water for now, to help Michael.Â
You stop him before Calum can get too far. He smiles as he looks at you. âYes?â
âYouâve always been a good dad. Always. And youâll always be a good one too to the kids. I know your jobâs not easy because you have to be away and I know weâve all had to adjust with this last tour. But I want you to hear it--youâre a good dad. Theyâve never cared that youâre in a band. Theyâve never cared about how many people fawned over you. Because to them you are only just Dad. So donât beat yourself up for what you had to do to provide for us, and to make yourself happy. This is just a new chapter--not you making up for something.â
âHave I told you I loved you today yet?â
âOnce or twice.â
Stepping into you, Calum cups your cheek with his free hand. âIâll do my best not to think Iâm making up for something. But I also think of this choice as doing what I can to do right by my children. I donât want Yvonne to ever question me like Ro did. And I know Ro didnât mean it maliciously. But Iâm not going to make that same mistake twice. I want to be home. I want to be just Dad. For me. For them. For you.â
âI can get behind just Dad.â
With a chaste kiss, Calum slides his arm around your shoulders to bring you into a hug. âI love you,â he whispers into your hair.Â
âI love you,â you return in a whisper. Itâs slightly muffled by his chest. Sliding your arm around your waist, the two of you cross the backyard towards your respective spots. Claire waves as you pass from the pool and you wiggle a few fingers at her in return in order to not drop the glass.Â
âAlright kids, Iâm taking requests until however long the food takes,â you shout, turning the volume down just a hair so they can hear. They cheer and start shouting at you songs--some you know some you donât. You open the notes app on the second laptop to keep track of them all.Â
âCan I help?â Claire asks. Ro walks on past the DJ set up and keeps going towards Calum and the grill
You nod at Claireâs quesiton. âMind getting all their requests down? If Michael has it, Iâll shuffle them in.â
She nods, stepping to your right. âI can do that.â
âThanks.â Thereâs a slight pause as Claire gets situated to take down names of songs and artists. âYou enjoying yourself so far?â you ask.Â
âYeah. Everyoneâs really nice. Except Jeremy for tipping Ro.â
âJeremy can be a hell raiser.â
âSo like are these actually their cousins?â
You laugh, scratching lightly at the turntable as you transition into the first requested song. âNo, Luke, Ashton, and Michael,â you point them each out as you name them, âare Calumâs bandmates and best friends. Theyâve been through thick and thin and are like brothers. So all our kids call each other cousins and the other bandmates uncle. Calumâs family is overseas. Sisterâs in Londonl. His parents are in Australia. My familyâs here in the states, but not in California.â
âOh, that makes a lot more sense! So the bandâs been around for a long time, huh?â
âYeah, a long time. The album to check out of there is Youngblood. But I didnât tell you that. Was not me.â
Claire laughs. âGot it.â
âDoing any new crochet projects?â
âOkay,â Claire starts excitedly, facing you fully. âYou cannot tell Ro. But Iâm working on a little bat for them. Itâll be stuffed. And like I know itâs totally cliche. But I wasnât sure what other animal to make.â
You smile. âI wonât say a word.â
âA bat is too cliche, right?â
âOh, Claire, theyâll love it no matter what. Donât worry.â Youâre working to find the right point to transition to the next song, bobbing along to the beat.Â
âHow-how do you do all of this?â she asks, waving over Michaelâs set up.
You lower the volume on one song, slowly turning up the second one until itâs at the beat drop, letting the two meet seamlessly until the second song takes over fully. You then take the headphones off and hold them out to her. âMichael taught me many moons ago. And I think itâs fitting to pass along the tradition.â
âHe wonât be mad?â
âWho? Michael?â She nods. âNo, not in the slightest.â She finally takes the headphones, keeping one ear off, so she can hear your instructions at which knobs do what.Â
On the opposite side, Ro stands next to the grill, reaching for the beer in Calumâs hand. He gives it easily but warns, âA sip and this one is bitter.âÂ
Ro takes a bigger sip, not quite believing the warning. âOh, you were right,â they laugh, face scrunched up as they hand the bottle back to Calum. âHow do you drink that?â
As his sip goes down, Calum makes a dramatic show of smacking his lips lightly. âYears of training,â he teases.Â
âI think you shouldâve done the kebabs first. The marinade probably wouldâve tasted good against the burgers too.â
âKebabs smoke a lot. You want a little bit of chare, not a five course meal of it,â Calum returns.Â
âOkay, thatâs fair,â Ro laughs, grabbing a pair of tongs and saving one hot dog from rolling too far away from the heat.Â
âYouâre going to put me out of job,â Michael teases before asking to slip behind Ro. âNot that Iâll complain too much.â
Ro steps out of the way before speaking, âIf you want, Iâd definitely take over grilling duties.â
âI can help inside then. I think some sides need to be warmed up. If youâre chill with it? If not, I have no problem.â
Ro grins. âIâll help on the grill.â
âAlright. Just let me know when you need anything.â Michael slips back out from behind them and jogs into the house. Calum hands over the second Kiss the Cook apron and Ro doesn't hesitate to put it on.Â
Calum studies the smoke for a moment. âCan I run something by you?â
âYeah?â
âI canât--I canât break contract right now. But we will be re-negotiating soon. And what would you say if after this album, I didnât renegotiate, like not under my own music, but producing for some other artists.â
Ro presses their pair of tongs together--the metal making a pointed clapping sound. âWhat do you mean? Like thatâs your last album?â
Calum nods. âYeah. Itâs an idea thatâs been floating around for a while and I think weâre all getting to a point where it might be a good time to take a break--a real one.â
âSo youâd be home more?â
âIâd be back to huff and puff about you being up late and for movie nights.â
âIâd-Iâd say that you should do whatâs best. But Iâd really like to have you home more for sure. But could you just tell your label, youâre done?â
âWeâve been working on this for a long time now. Two years at least. Itâs been looming and I wanted to see how you feel. We might not technically get done until you almost graduate high school. But even still--Iâd be home. Just like weâre making any other album. Iâm on my way back to the house by 6 and I call if Iâm going to be late. But then if you do go to college, I could help you move in. There might be a few months while Iâm away, but then Iâd be back for good and we could take road trips on your school breaks.â
Itâs not the immediate sort of solution that Ro wouldâve wanted. But they look back to the pool and see Yvonne sitting under the shade. And it would mean that for her, sheâd get more time with their dad. And Ro and Calum could do the drive down the coast like they talked about when they get their license. And in some regards, Ro could see that he was listening. He was doing what he could to be home more.Â
âThatâd be cool.â
Calum finishes turning off his section of hotdogs and looks up to see a smile on their face. âYou mean that?â
âYeah, like, I understand you can just say you're done right now and walk away. Thereâs still obligations you have. But to know soon youâd be home and be staying home a lot more, thatâs a comforting thought.â
Iâm sorry itâs not more immediate--really I am. But I will do what I can to make sure I am home more.â
âI can see it, Dad. Thanks--for listening.â
âOf course. Now donât forget your flip. Charred, not burnt.â
âRight, right, right.â Ro snaps the tongs a few times to punctuate the sentence. âNow itâs my turn to listen.â
summary: after little elizabeth overhears her classmate, she goes to work on trying to get a letter to you. michael, being the good father that he is, noticed that his daughter had been outside far longer than usual and goes to check on her.
pairing: dad! michael x daughter! oc, past michael x reader
word count: 529 words
warnings: dead reader, reader is a mom, ex-antichrist, definite canon divergence, dad! michael, named daughter, she/her reader
a/n: this doesnât have a title because iâve come to the conclusion that not everything needs one (and i couldnât think of a good one so)
âElizabeth, darling, what do you think youâre doing?â Michael questioned his daughter, his arms crossed over his chest. Â
The little girlâs big eyes widened. They were identical to yours. Every glance made Michael long for you, for your guidance in this wild ride of a life.
She turned slowly to face her father, dirt caked under her nails and all over her hands. Her hair was haphazardly pulled back with an old hairtie of yours, stray strands of hair all over her little neck. Dirt and grass stained the front of her clothes. Â
Elizabeth smiled nervously at her father. âIâm not doing anything,â she said, rocking back on her little heels. Her feet were bare. Grass tickled at her toes and she tried to keep in whatever laugh she felt bubble in the back of her throat. Â
âDonât lie to me, little one,â he said, narrowing his eyes at the girl. Â
She pursed her lips, looking back at the pile of dirt she had dug up. The gardening shovel she had used sat off to the side. She was just about ready to shovel the dirt back onto the letter that she had buried, but of course, her father was there to question her about everything.Â
Elizabeth crossed her own arms over her chest, imitating Michael. âIâm not lying, daddy.â
âYouâre just like your mother,â he said, walking over to her. âI always knew when she was lying. I know when youâre lying, too.â He paused, seeing the little tears beginning to form in his daughterâs eyes. He sighed softly, a hand gently pressing against her dirt smudged cheek. âEliza, you are not in trouble,â he spoke, taking out her hair tie and properly tying it back into a ponytail. âYouâve definitely made a mess, but that doesnât mean youâre in trouble. What are you up to?â
Elizabeth sniffled softly and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. âI⊠a girl at school. She said that, that I could bury a letter and it would get to mommy,â she said, looking up at her father. âI wanted to tell her that I want her to come back. I love her. I miss her.â
She couldnât fight back her tears and she quickly hugged onto her dad. Michaelâs arms quickly wrapped around her little body and he pressed a warm kiss to the top of her head. Â
âYour mommy knows that you love her. She knows. Donât you ever think otherwise,â he said.Â
But⊠if Michael was being honest with himself, he didnât know. He had no idea where you were. You were the love of his life, and he still couldn't find you. One day, he would make the witches pay for the spell they put your soul underâbecause of that spell, you were undetectable to everyone save for the witch that cast it. But that day could wait. Because as much as he would love to see you again, he made you a promise. A promise to raise your child with as much love and kindness as he could. And despite the fact that he was the ex-antichrist, he was doing a wonderful job at it. Â
what about dad!michael?đ„ș why can i imagine outpost michaelâs kids acting tuffâąïž in front of everyone bc thatâs how dad acts and oc just chuckles to herself bc itâs so cute. but behind closed doors theyâre so soft boiâąïž.
please! i love the idea of mini michaels (wearing little capes!!!) following michael around the outpost and kinda mimicking his mannerism!!!Â
but when they're alone obvs little sweethearts! i can see them all piling up on their momma for kisses and dad!michael being just a little pouty bc 1. he wants y/n kisses and 2. ... a little jealous that overall... they're mommaâs boys đ„ș








