#cabaretti

Kaust is one of the Ravnican Agency of Magicological Investigations' fast-rising stars. He has an exceptional talent for investigative work and a charismatic personality that convinces even the most reluctant witnesses to trust him. In addition to the Agency's comprehensive resources, he cultivates his own personal network of friends and informants. This network allows him to keep a finger on the pulse of the local community and hear news—often before anyone else.

For those who don't know him well, his gentle demeanor deceives them into thinking he's just a grunt concerned with solving cases and little more. In truth, his mildness hides a deep resentment against the guilds, which he believes are restricting the Agency's ability to solve cases by clinging tightly to their own jurisdictional rights. To Kaust, criminal convictions aren't nearly as important as the health of a community. His solution: take matters into his own hands. If turning in a culprit is for the greater good, then he hands the case over to the appropriate authorities, just as he should. But if giving up a culprit would do more harm than good, he's not above simply "misplacing" a case file or using his personal network to leak information that gives the culprit a chance to disappear.

The New Capenna sneak peek stream contained a brief summary of each of the five factions, but no text version of them were in the associated article. Here’s a transcription.

The Obscura (Esper/white-blue-black)

The Gifted Magicians. Talented wizards and mystics, who use their powers to deceive and blackmail. Using distractions, illusions and hidden mechanisms, they orchestrate scenarios and manipulate outcomes to their benefit. They endeavor to maintain a facade of normalcy in their everyday lives, to allow them to run their schemes without disruption.

The Maestros (Grixis/blue-black-red)

The Elite Assassins. Old money vampires who love the finer things in life and are willing to kill to get them. They maintain a public front as an upstanding organisation of art afficionados, with the goal of preserving the art and culture of Old Capenna. Beneath this polished veneer, they are a shadowy organisation of elite assassins, focused on maintaining power, influence and wealth.

The Riveteers (Jund/black-red-green)

The Destruction Workers. Tough as nails artisans who can break buildings as easily as kneecaps. They're a rowdy, brute-force crime faction who's skills in industry and construction also makes them pros at demolition and intimidation. As skilled artisans, they've transformed the lower levels of the city into a layer worthy of their draconic leader.

The Cabaretti (Naya/red-green-white)

The Party Monsters. A fun-loving cult of druids who throw the hottest parties in town. They're the glitterati of the city and everyone wants to be invited to their feasts and dance halls. They use ancient magic to sway the opinion of the masses and keep the Halo flowing. The party never ends if you keep paying, but the moment you stop you might fight it hard to leave.

The Brokers (Bant/green-white-blue)

Could you envision more modern Capenna??

Do y'all want me to get into the weird poly thing the family heads have going on? Because this is how you get me to get into that.

The Obscura have always tread the fine line between "totally legit psychics" and "scam psychics". The invention of things like TV and phones would only exacerbate that already-existing problem.

The invention of new things would also open the doorway to more "methods" for the Obscura to use in their various divinations. They already had cards, crystal balls, and the like before, but someone invents the pendulum (only $9.99 if you call this definitely tolled number!) and it's all the rage for a few years among Obscura agents.

Raffine thinks it's funny as shit and has her own "psychic hotline" for the particularly wealthy to use.

The invention of more modern technology would also improve illusions and sleight-of-hand tricks. You can't tell me the Obscura wouldn't be all over that. Sure, they could just use their own magic, but if there's an easier and cheaper way, why not add that to your repertoire?

Conning people is just so easy in the modern age is what I'm saying.

The Maestros are going to be all over modern art movements, okay? Let's just make that one clear. Opening up the doorway to different types of art (such as pop art, which was popular in the 1940s to 1950s in the United States) leads to a broader range of museums with their own unique flairs.

While Xander hasn't been a fan of every art movement, he does get what they're going for and respects the grind, because holy shit they had to invent all sorts of new techniques and technology to make these pieces. He also has a soft spot for a few of the newer ones, but you'll never hear him say it aloud. (And yes, I'm saying his canon death didn't happen, fight me out behind the Denny's.)

Also, murder has gotten more easy! Or at least more interesting.

Of all of the families, the Riveteers would change the least. They're still a construction-based union, they just have cranes and bulldozers now. They've stayed in business due to demolishing and rebuilding as the years have gone on.

Ziatora still rules this mighty empire of loyal workers, directing her Riveteers on construction sites even as technology makes things faster. Though she does eventually have to invent OSHA because of how many of her workers she has to keep catching.

The existence of frat boys shows that the spirit of the Cabaretti is alive and well in the modern time, even if druidry has fallen to the wayside. A core foundation of the mortal experience is having fun, and the Cabaretti are still here to provide!

They also have their own version of the Michelin Stars going on. Like...I don't know, the Vantoleone Stars, after the Mezzio base that Jetmir refuses to let go of.

To give Jetmir credit, though, he's gotten a lot better about security for the revelries, in case there's a repeat of the Adversary-Crescendo incident. Of all of the family heads, he's adapted to the modern era the fastest.

Given everything going on above, yes, everyone still needs lawyers and security. That's where the Brokers still step in, though it's a lot more decentralized as different offices try to make their mark. Everyone still pays lip service to Falco Spara, but anything beyond that is up in the air.

Spara's still got sleeper agents all over the place, but he's a lot more guarded nowadays. Pretty much everyone is waiting for blood in the water to take him down from the top and put themselves in his place, so he's retreated from the public eye in favor of double- and triple-checking his contracts for loopholes. Even one could knock him from his perch. Rumor has it that the only people in contact with him anymore are his second-in-command and the other family heads.

...I almost feel bad for all the puns in this section.

As for everyone else, well.

The government and law system are still auctions rather than functional. (Though that's not too different from our modern day, huh?) Generally, as long as you get a mean enough Broker for a lawyer, your case is as good as won (or thrown out) regardless of your actual guilt status.

The angels are hanging around, adapting to either join the crime families (though it's very awkward between them and the demons) or creating their own merry bands of misfits. A good number of them work for the various newspapers, doing what they can to either help or hinder as they see fit - and according to their central color, of course.

Efforts to get back down to Old Capenna and see what's down there now have some public support, because enough time has passed that people have forgotten (other than Spara, who never forgets) what used to be down there. It's a free-for-all, as it requires a different set of survival skills from New Capenna, and no current attempts to rebuild down there have been successful with all of the monsters still running around.

Time continues to march forward, and so do the mortals of New Capenna. The primary question raised is how long the angels, demons, and avatars can keep up.

~Jasper

In our fifth matchup, we have New Capenna's celebratory consiglieris versus Tarkir's ... none of you have heard of Kung Fu: The Legend Continues, have you? David Carradine plays... ... never mind.

Hey everyone!