#borrower!gustave

It wasn’t the biggest argument Gustave had with Alan but it was one of those that actually made Gustave storm out of the hideout. The look on his face – cold anger, even worse than the inferno of the fury, prevented everyone from following him. He needed a bit of time to cool down and maybe compose himself. For the sake of Maelle and his apprentices if no one else.

- Humans ARE danger, Gustave! Don’t you remember what happened last time? – he growled.

- If you’d only stop seeing black and white you’d have found sense in that – he spoke coldly.

Of course Gustave haven’t forgotten the horrors they went through because of humans, but…

He couldn’t get himself to forget about his angel. He tried. And tried.

But the fascination drew him in. He kept nearing in, circling around so he could at least see him, even if Gustave didn’t get seen by Verso in exchange.

For the better, he lied to his feeelings. He wondered how long that lie could last.

He sat down and exhaled heavily, considering his options. The branch, the top of the tree where no one could bother him and he could take some time to think and note. Aside from the birds and squirrels which were peaceful and at the times didn’t seem to notice his presence among the leaves at all. He took it to his advantage, just sliding in between the still green leaves with his notebook. In the moments like this he appreciated his size – he could hide in a place like this and not be spotted for hours by anything or anyone. That was peaceful and cozy, even if falling was more hazardous than for humans. With that in his mind he began his trek to the top of the tree, it was much easier having a prosthetic from his apprentices. He could not thank them enough for that, his heart practically melted when they all sprinted in with their invention. Not only did it work, it also looked awesome, a pure work of art. He was proud, grateful and amazed. And in exchange his apprentices were over the moon when they saw his face. In this very moment there was no unhappy soul in the New Lumière.

But now, he was alone with no one to comfort him. And he needed to be alone.

But did he want to?

When he was halfway through climbing he heard it. A piano. The usual afternoon routine for Verso. Gustave stopped for a moment to drink the new tones in. This song was much sadder than his usual repertoire and it puzzled the borrower. Did something happen? Or was it just new tunes being tested?

Gustave was unsure and at this point a bit worried. Verso’s songs usually carried at least a spark of joy and happiness, this song was stripped from all of this. Like the music ached with him. As for why, the borrower couldn’t say.

But he could find out.

It didn’t even take a detour, the tree branches reached the windowsill gently. Gustave jumped down, landing on the table in the room. Seeing it from outside was quite different than actually being there. It was large even for humans, as for that he was sure, few missions showed them differently sized rooms, the largest being the atelier of Renoir and Aline. The walls sported the same pattern as almost everywhere, there was a mirror on the table and a few rogue sheet pages with half-written songs, ink still drying on the pages. The mirror worried him because if he were to hide behind anything in here he’d still be seen. But still feeling anger from the argument with Alan he waved it off.

He has seen me and nothing bad happened, it’ll be fine.

It seemed almost like he began not so long ago and was in the middle of composing. His posture suggested great focus and undoubtedly anger too.

What happened, Verso?

He stood there, his journal in hand, but instead of taking an action he kept looking at the human. Should he help? If so, how? What happens next? Didn’t he overcalculate this man’s kindness? Won’t he try and trap hi…

Stop, he thought to himself. He was ready to trust this man, but the old borrower rules decided to resurface just now. What if?

No. There has to be a way to make a difference.

The music changed from sad to angry, Verso almost hitting the keys instead of his usual gentleness. This scared Gustave. If the situation was this bad then he himself could be in danger.

Do I save you or do I save myself?

Before he could react, Verso repeated one part few times and stood up. Gustave swallowed nervously, looking at the loose and empty sheets awaiting new notes to be written on them.

As if he couldn’t be more correct, Verso turned around to grab the pen and the sheets. At this point Gustave just stood there, frozen. At the sight of the borrower his eyes softened. When he noticed the pure fear in Gustave's eyes his body language switched. He raised his arms and lowered himself so he wasn’t that intimidating.

- Hey. It’s alright – human whispered softly – I’m not… look, I’m not mad at you, if anything.

The tone of his voice carried his words true but Gustave was still terrified. The last time he saw him up close was in a safe setting, Verso was asleep and now it was a whole new situation. Gustave was practically defensless right now and instinctively started backing away while keeping eye contact. The sharp silver eyes followed his movements, filling the borrower with deeply imprinted fear.

The fear he was fed since his childhood. The fear of the gigantic creatures capable of crushing them on a whim or an accident.

But this human had a chance to do whatever he pleases and yet he chose to save me.

Gustave shook his head as if he wanted the fear to go away. It didn’t melt entirely but it began to give him his control over it back. Logical fear of someone way bigger than himself was still there, it was just managed.

- I know. It’s just… we’re actually taught to fear your kind on sight. And you seemed angry just a couple of minutes ago.

- I was. I’m sorry I scared you. But it doesn’t matter now. You… - he squinted to see him better – You’ve got new arm! – his eyes widened almost immediately.

- Yes. My apprentices made it for me – he reached it out so Verso could see it better.

Verso was unsure how or if he even should initiate physical contact. When Gustave was unconscious it was actually easier, although he was afraid he’ll do him more harm than help. It wasn’t particularly too hard to break a bone of someone the size of his hand so he kept being as gentle as possible, praying the tiny man will survive both Monoco’s bite and his first aid.

Thank goodness his prayers were answered.

Gustave noticed the uneasy look on his face combined with about the same body language and at first reluctantly stepped forward and laid his metallic arm on one of Verso’s fingertips. Borrower’s hearbeat almost skyrocketed upon realisation what he just did. His face must’ve showed that.

- It’s okay. You’re okay – human smiled lightly – I’m not going to hurt you – his voice was soft, quiet and reassuring.

Borrower looked up at him. His smile was indeed genuine and showed nothing but kindness. Not noticing when, he smiled back and his other hand also rested on the same fingertip.

- I know. I know – Gustave took a deep breath.

- Speaking of knowing – Verso added – what’s your name?

- Gustave. I’d ask you the same but…

- You already know mine – he chuckled – I wonder how that did happen – he thought he’ll be able to resist it but with his free hand’s finger he ruffled Gustave’s hair gently.

- Well… walls have ears – Gustave laughed, fixing his curls back in the place.

- And windowsills, tree branches… am I being spied on?

- You? Only by me, I’m afraid – Gustave stepped back and tilted his head.

- Now I do have to keep my appearance in check all the time.

- For me? – borrower knew he shouldn’t go that route but Verso started it. He couldn’t help it.

- Maybe… - Verso blushed.

- There you are! – a familiar voice cut the conversation short.

Gustave immediately paled upon hearing it.

- Maelle! – he practically jumped to her – What are you doing here?

- You stormed out and went missing, you were not in your usual spot… so I went on and tried to find you before trouble does. Although it seems you managed to find trouble yourself – she looked at Verso with a cold, unreadable face.

Verso didn’t catch it right away, but upon looking closer he froze.

That tiny girl looked just like Alicia.

Freckles, hair colour, face shape… it was just like her.

Giving up his dignity he kneeled in front of the table.

- Maelle, is it…? – he looked her in the eyes, reaching his hand gently. Even the eye colour matched his.

- Look, we’ve noticed. I look just like your sister. Can we get past it? – she snapped and gave him a sharp, angered look while dodging human’s hand.

Verso was still stunned but managed. He took his hand back, much to Gustave's disappointment.

- Y-yes – he stuttered and took a deep breath, trying to avoid staring at the girl in front of him.

- I should’ve told you. There’s more of us than just little old me – if not for the shock Verso’d chuckle upon hearing ‘little’ but now his ears didn’t even register the joke – But that’s all I can tell you with trust you won’t do us harm.

- Not in the world – his right hand landed on his chest. – Is there a way to help you, though?

This time Lune only rolled her eyes.

Gustave remembered every part of it. He knew he betrayed borrorwers’ rules once again but how could he not do that after hearing ‘I love you’ back from Verso?

He himself didn’t see that coming but here he stood ready to break every rule for his love again.

Each and every one of them.

Borrower’s life was short anyway, causes of death being so trivial to humans but serious and feared among the borrowers.

Something light for humans fell down on the unlucky borrower, one being eaten by a toad…

Bet humans would have a good laugh about it, Gustave thought. But not Verso, not his Verso. He’d have taken his words seriously. He has seen empathy in both his eyes and deeds alike, knowing full well his morals work differently.

To humans we are nothing more than pests…

But not to this one, he thought.

With his heart set up he trekked back again to Verso’s room, the closer he was the more noise he let himself make, seeing Verso was most likely alone and no servant nor dog was in sight.

Especially the dog.

He could see his lover noticing the small noises all around him from different places every few seconds. His smile only showed him he knew who’s to come. Verso playfully looked around, pretending to be scared.

- Oh what could that be? – he chuckled, eyes betraying his curiosity, looking for the source of the tiny noises Gustave made.

He wanted to see Gustave as badly as Gustave wanted to see Verso. It took him weeks to return, pretending he’s still scared of humans and besides that the base needed few improvements only the engineer could come up with, teamed with Lune. She of course grilled him about his sneaking but after seeing he’s dodging the questions for dear life she gave up, only warning him how this could end and that he should focus on their mission.

Oh fuck the mission, Lune, the words nearly left his lips, he bit his tongue last second before they actually did. It would draw unwanted attention and trouble, why do that to himself?

Before the next round of looking around the room was over Verso could see the tiny figure on his desk, leaning nonchalantly against one of the mugs filled with brushes and fountain pens.

Verso truly believed he could still be playful but missing Gustave for so long took over. He almost jumped to the desk and like before he kissed borrower’s head gently and in exchange Gustave hugged his hand.

- I missed you – they both said at the same time.

After a few seconds of silence Verso began:

- Where have you been? It’s been weeks! – he smiled sincerely.

- Well… I needed to lay low for a moment so nobody knows about… us, and our base needed few tweaks here and there and I am one of the few engineers there.

- I understand. I had a few things to do myself, but every time I realised you’re not here it stung – human laid his head on the desk once seated by it.

- Yeah, me too. I often wish there was a way for mutual understanding, but all I’m met with is fear. It’s so deeply imprinted I begin to believe there’s no way of getting rid of it. If anyone saw us…

- They’d be afraid you’re in trouble.

- Or I’d be in trouble – he smiled sadly – especially if it was Alan who saw it.

- He sounds so stubborn.

- He is stubborn. He almost cancelled our expedition to the manor because of your dog! – once the words escaped his lips Gustave laughed at the absurdity of it.

- Few weeks and you’re no less crazy – Verso shook his head.

- Maybe a little more – he tilted his head.

Verso looked like he was fighting himself for a second, his mind visibly away.

- Hey, you’re okay? – Gustave inched closer to Verso’s face.

- Yes… actually there was something I wanted to try the next time you show up – he smiled – last time you said our doses of alcohol could either drown or kill you. So I’ve come up with a solution – human reached something on one of the upper shelves Gustave couldn’t see.

Before he could ask what was that Verso handed him a tiny cup. Probably taken from what humans call a dollhouse but still it fitted into his hand perfectly. He looked at it, not sure what do do next.

- And how do you intend to fill that? – he teased the human.

Verso stood up. If not them knowing each other well Gustave would be startled at the sudden movement but instead he just sat down, awaiting human’s next actions.

He didn’t see himself in a situation like that. Borrowers had their own alcohol, of course they did, but for a good second he thought that of course they brew their beverages differently and the sole sip could knock him out or more likely kill him.

But we make it out of the same stuff, maybe it won’t be that bad?, engineer tried to calm himself down.

Then Verso came back with what looked like a… syringe.

- The best thing I could come up with, the other one being the drops from the spoon – human noticed the fear on Gustave’s face – are you okay?

- Well… we do have our own alcohol, but… I’m only scared about…

- Come on, we use the same ingredients and probably the same techniques – he patted Gustave’s head lightly – if anything goes wrong, I’m here, okay?

Borrower gave it a long thought.

- Okay. I trust you – he put his hand on Verso’s knuckles.

- So… shall we? – wine bottle landed on the table, startling Gustave at first. Being around human this close made him forget how huge the world is sometimes and the bottle was at least three times as tall as he was.

- Bring it on – borrower smiled teasingly, trying not to look at the bottle, felling stupid that inanimate object managed to scare him.

Verso took the syringe and carefully poured the crimson liquid into Gustave’s cup, then proceeded to pour into his own. He looked at the amount of wine in Verso’s cup and whistled.

- That’d definitely drown me first – he chuckled.

- Not when I’m around – he put his cup on the piano – let’s move somewhere comfortable – he laid his hand flat so the borrower could climb it easily.

Gustave held his cup carefully as Verso went to the piano and then the smaller man walked off to the keyboard. He still eyed his beverage warily.

- Having second thoughts? – Verso was ready for that kind of outcome but still he hoped for a drink with him.

Gustave battled himself for a second.

You’re not alone, it’ll be fine. If something happens you just stop.

Verso noticed that and was ready for having the cup handed back or set aside, his eyes widened as the borrower took the first sip.

- Had second thoughts – he spoke and then coughed – putain, that’s definitely different from what I know. More…

- …dry? – Verso helped him finish the thought – maybe because it is a dry wine. I bought it few weeks ag… - before finishing the sentence he realised the time matched with when they last met and that Gustave is smart.

Gustave only tilted his head.

- Oh, so even back then you hoped for another date? – his smile was dangerous now.

- Uh… - Verso’s defences were rendered useless – maybe…?

The sole shade of his face now almost matching the wine betrayed the truth.

- So you did buy that for us. Nobody asked what’s that for?

- Not really, I didn’t exactly tell anyone and nobody even asked. It was stashed in my room for the moment we… you…

- Come back.

- Yes – Verso hid face in his hands.

- No need to be all blushed, that’s cute. Thank you – he sat on the keyboard, weighing the cup in his hands – and it’s really good. It’s only the taste and the stre… - he stopped as a sudden hiccup left his mouth.

Verso uncovered his face only to laugh.

- That wine be really good on you, eh?

- I think so – another sentence cut short by another hiccup.

It was a cute view but Verso knew to take care of him so he kept observing the borrower. After it calmed down he took another sip.

- You’re eager – human poured himself another cup as it was empty.

- Who’s eager now? – Gustave pointed at Verso’s cup.

- I still bet it’s you.

Gustave laughed, only to find he laughed a bit too loud.

He had hoped it was less loud than human laughter but Verso had noticed the increased volume.

- And it seems I win. Want another?

Normally he would say no.

He truly would.

But the liquid gave him the bravery he never thought he’ll have.

He knew he should fear it, but with Verso he could really face anything.

With another cup filled and alcohol making its way into Gustave’s head and bloodstream faster than Verso’s the range of how he could feel expanded. With borrower’s alcohol he never felt like that. But due to their on-the-move nature they couldn’t afford getting drunk too hard. And their drinks were never brewed to be that strong.

It made him feel brave and confident.

Wasn’t that what humans did every weekend though?, he recalled. Now he knew why was that the case.

Verso eyed the borrower clearly having fun, sipping his own share of wine. He was actually happy he could give Gustave some respite, even if it could result in a hangover.

He’ll take care of it, he thought, taking another cup and filling it with water instead.

- Here, you need this too – he handed him water-filled cup.

- Really? – he looked at Verso and snickered – okay, okay, you’re right – upon noticing the subtle change in human’s gaze he took in the cup. Verso was the one to know what to do when drinking.

- Yes. Really – he showed his own cup now filled with water too.

As they both drank their water Gustave realised he might be here for a while and a single thought crossed his mind. He took his jacket off and tossed it aside.

- Whoa, whoa – Verso raised his hands – haven’t you had enough wine?

- It’s for comfort, silly – Gustave laughed, seeing what Verso had in mind – I’m not that kind of a person.

- I hope so – he ruffled Gustave’s hair.

- Hey, you’re ruining my perfectly prepared hair! – he stood up and tried to walk to the end of the keyboard to slap the very finger that ran through his curls which was out of his reach now. Instead he tripped over his own legs and if not for Verso’s quick intervention he would have met the floor and probably break a few bones. What normally would have terrify him now made him laugh and plant few kisses on the hand that saved him once more.

They sat in silence for a moment, Gustave leaning against Verso’s hand on the keyboard, comforted by its warmth.

- This totally shouldn’t be.

- What shouldn’t be?

- Us. Thought you need a human in your life, not…

- I believed that too, but you… I couldn’t stop thinking about you, you know? – Verso looked him in the eyes, silver threathening to pierce through Gustave’s soul – it doesn’t fit any norm, but… I just can’t do it differently. I tried to forget, to force some sense into my heart but it kept circling back to you – his finger now caressed Gustave’s cheek in the most careful manner – I was afraid you won’t say yes because of the differences, and here you came to say just that.

- You were afraid? You? – he snickered, then sobered up for a second – sorry, poor joke to make, I didn’t mean to belittle your feelings. In fact I was afraid by the same thing. Why in the world would a human love the borrower? To most we’re just pests.

- Then you’re the cutest little pest in my life – Verso’s courage was fueled both by alcohol and Gustave’s words. Another kiss landed on engineer’s curls.

- And you’re the safest human to be around – the highest compliment Gustave could come up with.

Verso was flabbergasted by what he just heard.

- T…thank you – his words were honest just like the look on his face. He expected teasing, any flirtatious line but not this amount of honesty.

Perhaps that’s the alcohol’s effects on him, he thought drinking the sight of the borrower in.

- Another round then? To love – Verso tilted the bottle and filled the syringe and then his own cup as before.

- To love – engineer raised his cup as did his lover.

Gustave thought he had it under control but more alcohol just took over.

Unknowingly he began humming borrowers’ songs.

- Hey, what’s that? – Verso’s eyes showed curiosity again.

- An old tune I was taught as a child.

- So it’s… borrower’s music?

- Yes, very much – normally he’d share nothing of that but the situation was so different he just decided he could share some of his world’s culture – we don’t have grand pianos or anything like that but, for example, guitars. And music is something we picked from humans, we listen closely once we’re sure we’re safely hidden! – he remembered listening in to the music played in various houses they occupied in the past. He remembered Lune hearing guitar for the first time and immediately falling for it, wanting one of her own. Took a while to study how the thing works and how it is built but once it was made Lune played it almost all of her free time before being taken on the apprenticeship. But even after that she loved music.

- Do you have… drinking songs?

Gustave scratched his head.

- I… I don’t think so.

- Well, brace yourself – he opened his palm and once Gustave was on it he put him on his sholuder again, feeling the tiny figure clinging to him more than normally.

He wasn’t exactly used to sing and play at once but drinking tunes were something he didn’t need a singing voice for. As the song went Gustave actually joined after hearing the lyrics few times.

- Not the most ambitious song in your repertoire but still delivered nicely – Gustave judged.

- I’ve got plenty more if you want. We won’t bother anyone, it’s only me and the servants’ rooms are on the other side of the manor anyway.

- Please do – he patted Verso’s arm to encourage him.

And he needed nothing more.

Having sung the better part of the evening they both noticed less and less energy put in them and less energy in themselves.

The first one to give in was Gustave, Verso barely noticing the yawns.

- Getting sleepy, aren’t we? – he put Gustave on the keyboard again.

- Perhaps a bit – he sat down as his legs were threatening to trip on themselves.

- We should rest – the words sobered Gustave up.

- I should…

- Return, I know. But if you come back drunk they’ll definitely suspect something. Hangover is not exactly easy to mask but with both of us having water in the meantime we should be fine tomorrow. My family would react with suspicion too if I got drunk alone – he extended his hand to the borrower – trust me, this is better.

Gustave panicked, an attack almost winning its way through, only to vanish upon realisation that Verso was right. If he returned now there would be more trouble.

He could lie or slip in when everyone were still asleep, then saying he worked on something and just had no energy to change into different clothes. Now he wasn’t sure he could navigate the manor anyway.

He climbed the palm and accepted the consequences of his actions. He felt warmth around him, he closed his eyes almost immediately and waited for Verso on the bed he was put on. Human only took his vest and shoes off, Gustave took the hint and did the same.

- Now don’t panic, I don’t sleepwalk or anything – he took the borrower into his palm – just relax and have some sleep, you’re okay.

- Okay – reasurred by his lovers words he laid on his chest. It was broad and warm, the heartbeat perceptible and to him, audible. He first spread out almost like a starfish, only to move into more hugging position.

Verso’s hand cradled him from above, ensuring safety.

- Good night, mon amour.

Gustave was about to respond but sleep claimed him faster than he’d like it to do so.

Verso savoured the moment for a bit longer.

- Slipping away again?

Gustave froze, backpack still in his hand. Fortunately it was not Alan who found him this time.

- Lune… – he started.

- You know Alan will find out. And how he’ll react. Aren’t you sacrificing too many rules for that human? Do you still believe in what we’ve been taught?

He went silent for a moment. Yes, of course they had rules, they were here for a good reason. They’ve been treated like pests for generations. Was it because of their size or merely their nature forced by it? It was theft but it was not a choice, it was a necessity were they to survive.

And that man, his guardian angel… he could not forget him nor was he willing to push him out of his heart. How was he even supposed to do so? After all they shared more than a borrower and human should.

Gustave smiled at Lune weakly.

- I hope I do.

And with that farewell he turned back without looking her in the eyes.

Straight into the night.

*

After not finding himself in Alan’s clutches Gustave sighed with relief. If he did, he’d not only be scolded, they were close to throwing fists at one another the other day. Or at least, Alan was. Gustave did his best to keep his dignity but even his patience was wearing thin. That’s why he walked away that time, although his boiling blood kept tempting him into hitting Alan to settle this once and for all.

Everyone saw this fracture in their little community. Old ways were confronted with fresh new view not everyone liked. Most borrowers were still scared of humans and rightfully so, but that one human seemed to break that worldview for some. Gustave’s apprentices were fascinated by the stories of Verso, a human who saved their teacher. Also amazed by how Gustave was not afraid of him, sometimes being the one seeking contact. Of course they were told not to breathe a word but kids are not the best with secrets and knowing that risk he told them the stories anyway. He wanted the future generations to know that human does not always mean danger. Of course, there were safety measures, but maybe there was some middle ground to be found?

With that hope he kept slipping out. To find out how to lay foundations for that middle ground.

And of course, Verso. He stopped lying to himself that it was for the peacemaking only but his heart skipping a beat was not something he expected. He tried to wave it off but the more he did the more his heart disobeyed.

It can’t and won’t be, get real.

With that in mind he made his way to Verso’s room. He could head anywhere else, the piano room, kitchen to borrow something and have a good excuse for disappearing, though he knew it’d be a poor lie anyway, but man’s room was where he felt safe. No other place in the manor made him feel that way. Not even their hideout full of people taking care of each other in the best ways possible.

No, it had to be this particular room.

Once again upon landing on the floor it hit him how big everything was. A simple chair would take him a climb, not to mention the desk. The same desk on which he was rescued. The room had a smaller piano inside, Sciel mentioned the family being rich and the manor showed just that so that was no surprise to him.

At first he thought he’ll just climb a desk or a bed where Verso was sleeping, but not knowing whether he does sudden movements in his sleep Gustave held back. Verso would probably hate himself if he did anything to the borrower too, even if it was accident caused by Gustave’s recklessness.

Do I know him that much?

Surprised at how far his thoughts took him he chose the piano. He was light enough not to press any key even on accident.

Then it hit him.

The second he sat down on the keys and looked at Verso he was awestruck. Man was so peaceful in his sleep, his face so calm and perfect even if it was half-covered by the quilt. He didn’t seem to move a lot while asleep but Gustave didn’t want to risk it.

Oh, to hold him in my arms…

Even more surprised the borrower took a second look at Verso. No. It was not different, he still looked perfect and beautiful. Knowing man’s heart and intentions were not helping at all.

Why am I even thinking about this?

Gustave knew it wasn’t meant to happen. Not with their size and cultural differences.

And the damned dog, he laughed bitterly to himself.

Verso was a human, he needed a human partner, not someone he could cover with not even entirety of his palm. Someone who could hug him properly, give him what he needed. He couldn’t give him anything and was even forbidden from going this far.

For the first time in his life, Gustave wished he was a human.

At first he cursed at his nature but then came the bitter sadness gnawing at his heart. This will never be and yet his heart ached for it. For him. Without being sure the feelings would be returned.

Oh to be more than just a curiosity. Than…

…nothing.

*

Verso did not hear it first, he wasn’t exactly heavy sleeper but he wasn’t the type to wake upon hearing any quiet noise.

But this time was different.

He heard someone crying.

And what made matters worse, the voice was familiar.

He opened his eyes and scanned the room. It took him a while since the whole room was covered in darkness but he found the source soon enough. Tiny figure was sitting on his room piano.

That’s where the crying came from.

Knowing the sudden noises could scare him he walked to him in the softest, most silent manner he could, but Gustave seemed to be deep in his own misery.

What happened, Gustave?

Few heartbeats later he was by the piano, not sure how to get his attention. But he couldn’t look at him like that either.

His index finger patted borrower’s back lightly. If not for the sadness Verso was sure Gustave would jump upon the sudden touch. But he only raised his head to look at the human.

- Hey – Verso started, his finger still caressing Gustave’s back – what’s wrong?

Gustave didn’t even know how to respond. How to tell him, if he even should do so. Good old ‘I love you’ was not even on his mind.

He simply reached behind himself to touch the finger that was still there.

- I… I needed... to… - he couldn’t get the words out.

- … See me? – he smiled teasingly in hopes that’ll take the borrower away from his sad thoughts.

And only after saying that he understood.

Gustave went here all the way from their hiding place, wherever in the manor that was, just to see him. He no longer believed it was simply because of the gratitude or…

Despite the darkness he knew Gustave noticed his blush because first he looked upon him flabbergasted and then smiled, first cautiously then openly. Almost like when they locked eyes when he was observing Verso from the trees. And Verso felt the heat in his cheeks going up to his ears.

If anyone turned the light on right now would see a beetrot of a person.

- Y-yes. You look so peaceful when you sleep.

- Been here a while, haven’t you?

- Uhm… only few moments, really – he crossed his legs, showing his trust by relaxing in front of the human. He knew that wasn’t necessary but he wanted to show him that.

That he was special.

- But enough to climb here, look at me sleeping and crying… is everything okay?

Gustave hated to give it deeper thoughts but he had to. Nothing was okay. Not even him being what he was was okay. He wanted to give this man his heart and even that was rendered impossible.

In a different world, huh?

The change in Gustave’s face must have been drastic because Verso practically enveloped tiny man with his hands, covering him from the horrors of the reality, not knowing the only horror of the borrower’s life was his heart’s desires. A heart that chose so wrong it couldn’t have been worse.

Holding back tears and mustering his courage he looked into Verso’s silver eyes.

- You… I… - his entire courage crumbled upon saying these two words. He began shaking with tears, sobbing, mourning the future he was not meant to have.

Verso’s heart skipped a beat this time. He didn’t want to say anything due to the borrower’s independent nature, cautious attitude towards humans and size difference. How would Gustave react? Verso heard they were afraid of being trapped, the power imbalance playing a major role here. He didn’t want to do that to him. He didn’t want to hurt him either, both emotionally and physically.

If he were to choose he’d go with the borrowers and every single discomfort that came with it.

Damn the piano, he’d like to do more than just caress him with his finger.

- Hey… Gustave – he didn’t mean to use his size advantage but right now he needed to. He gently lifted man’s face to look at him, the sole feeling of his tiny beard beneath his fingers made him want to hug him properly, to beat his side rather than above him – I think I know what you’re getting at – his heart raced as his cheeks burned once again – and I’m afraid…

- That we’re not meant to be. Not in this life.

- …That I feel the same.

If not for the Verso’s finger under his chin Gustave’s jaw would probably fall down to the floor and roll away. His eyes widened as he looked at the human. Did he really say that? Did he mean that?

Of course he does, he never lied to me.

Borrower stood up, his weight still doing nothing to the keyboard.

- You… y-you do? – he was battling himself but he had to ask.

- Yes. You’re brilliant, resourceful, beautiful. And maybe a bit lucky – Verso let out a chuckle.

Gustave didn’t respond, just rested his head on the man’s hand.

- And you’re talented and charming. You stole the beautiful line from me.

- Pardon, can we assume it was both ways an call it a day? – he looked at the borrower, smiling warmly.

- I think we can call it a night – Gustave was not sure where he found his courage again but it was probably Verso’s teasing.

And the stone being lifted from his heart probably helped.

- A night? I haven’t bought you a drink first – he laughed quietly.

- Your doses of alcohol could either drown me or kill me – Gustave chuckled.

- Fair enough. What then?

- Well, since your first idea didn’t go as well as planned you can try something else.

Verso scratched his chin and thought for few seconds.

- I think I’ve got something but you’ve got to trust me – he looked at Gustave seriously.

- Whatever you have in mind? – his eyes looked upon him trustfully.

- Can I… lift you up? To my arm, I mean, hold to my shirt or hair if you need to.

As an answer Gustave climbed the open palm in front of him and let Verso lift him to his right shoulder. He clung to his shirt immediately, the soft cotton being almost like a giant blanket to him.

And the warmth beneath it. Oh, the warmth.

He inhaled the new range of scents around him. Borrowers were naturally more sensitive to those so it was easy to catch that change. His hair smelled of lavender while his shirt of something floral Gustave couldn’t name, probably some soap mix and he also caught something that was without a doubt Verso’s own scent. He closed his eyes and let himself remember that moment, the smells and the feeling of Verso’s curls all around him. He reached with his good hand to touch them. They were soft, uncombed because of the lack of time to brush them after he was woken up by Gustave’s cries and almost the same shade as his own. He kept running his fingers through them, unable to stop.

- Like it here, don’t you? – hearing Verso’s voice this close was new to him. He almost fell down if he had not tightened his grip around the shirt’s fabric and unfortunately Verso’s hair. What was more fortunate that the pull was not strong, Gustave for once this evening thanked the fate for being this small and not able to harm Verso.

- Sorry. Hearing your voice like that was new.

- No. That’s okay. Now, ready for the treat?

- Always – he chuckled, clinging to Verso’s hair once again. He could bury himself in here and just fall asleep.

Instead, he awaited what the man had in store for him.

His song was played so gently due to the night time but it was beautiful. And this time it was the same joyful tune Verso played when Gustave, Lune and Maelle were borrowing.

He swayed to the tune again, moves barely noticeable for Verso but he paid close attention to the tiny figure’s reactions. Small movements encouraging him to play. The tune itself wasn’t polished yet but if they showed each other their vulnerabilities, then why not?

Upon ending the tune he placed Gustave on the keyboard again.

- Liked it?

- More than anything. I… – he stepped from side to side – I actually remember this one. You played it when we were borrowing and we were on your desk. The matchbox was still there and all the memories came back. Your music pulled me out of the panic attack.

Verso didn’t realise that and hearing that he helped him in more way than one was gratifying, but to hear it only took his beloved dog to traumatise Gustave for a lifetime filled him with regret.

If he only taught Monoco better.

- I… I’m sorry.

- For what?

- For not training my dog better. I should have but delayed it all the time.

- It’s okay, it was an accident. Calm down – Gustave noticed uneasiness on Verso’s face.

- But if I did better, you…

- I would have never met you. Yes, I lost an arm, but for knowing you it was a fair price.

Verso was not sure how to respond. His dog maimed the little man in front of him and now he was actually grateful for that.

- You’re crazy, you know that? It’s you who got attacked and now you’re suddenly thankful?

- Perhaps fate willed it? And it’s in the past we can’t change. Let’s focus on the present.

- If you say so – his hand inched closer to Gustave.

It wasn’t exactly a hug as it was needed but that was all they could do. Borrower hugged his fingers back, unwilling to let go. Verso understood that. In his place he’d have done the same.

How does he make it more like an actual hug?

And before he could think this through his other hand automatically enveloped Gustave’s back, fingers curling lightly around it. Verso knew the smaller man needed him right now and was willing to provide it in its entirety. His finger unknowingly caressed borrower's back.

And then he placed a gentle kiss on Gustave’s head. He felt curls on his lips and his finger caressed his back a bit harder. Like he would have done with the regular kiss.

He paid close attention to his moves though so they were not hurting the tiny man.

When he pulled back Gustave’s eyes were dilated, his face both shocked and in awe.

He was not sure how to respond. His range of possibilities was limited because of the size difference and Verso’s face being out of his reach.

- You know, if you want a return you have to go down here – he looked at Verso, trying to look and sound teasingly but instead his voice cracked and his face burned.

- Well, your wish is my command – he put his head on the keyboard and that was all he needed.

He approached him, silver eyes tracking his every move, awaiting what’s to come next.

The kiss was so gentle and small Verso wouldn’t notice it. It felt so light but it was there. A sensation of love stored in the tiny lips of the man in front of him.

- Now we’re even – Gustave smiled and then realised – but… I have to go.

- Why? – Verso wanted to rise up in shock but held back to not scare him.

- We… we borrowers have rules, you remember?

- Yes – he remembered now.

- First is not to engage with humans. Second is keeping away from them. Some of the fellow borrowers noticed me being fond of you, there were arguments. I have to keep it calm or Alan, our leader kills me.

Verso sighed sadly.

- I understand. But… - he offered his palm. One last hug?

- Absolutely – he climbed human’s hand once again, now with the full trust as he cradled him in it and held to his chest.

Closest to a hug they could get, and even if it wasn’t perfect, it was theirs.

Gustave listened to Verso’s heartbeat, drinking the sound in.

Verso remembered tiny arms hugging his chest, Gustave’s head against his heart.

- I love you – Gustave was the first to say the words.

- I love you too. Travel safely – he put the borrower on the floor, knowing well he’ll manage.

He’ll find me again.

The silence of the hideout was something familiar yet unsettling. Accompanied with darkness and knowledge that he has to tell Maelle the truth it was heavy. Even if he knew he’d get the greatest secret off his chest, thogh it was now only for that one person.

It was the most important person who should know about the whole mess he has gotten himself into.

Maelle was near the entrance, covered with quilt but he saw her uniform when she pretended to turn in her sleep.

„I know you’re not sleeping” he whispered as quiet as possible. „You were right. We need to talk” the last words were enough for Maelle to blow her cover and open her eyes.

She looked at him, bits of anger still lingering in her stare.

„But truth only” she got up quietly and followed the engineer to his makeshift workshop.

Before Maelle could open her mouth to get her answers Gustave cut in.

„How could you leave on your own? You could get hurt!” he was trying to keep his voice low but now it was a really loud whisper before turning into quieter one once he realized. „You know the dang…”

„Dangers, yes. Now I think we’re here to address your disappearances, no?” she shot him a deadly glare.

„Fine. Just… don’t do that again”

„Only if you don’t”

Gustave only sighed.

„So… I’m not leaving” he assured the girl first. „But there’s something…”

„About Verso, right?”

Gustave froze.

Then blushed.

He didn’t expect his love’s name to be brought so quickly, but here he was with truth laid bare.

Maelle looked at the engineer unsure, then understood that the blush was not the work of her imagination.

„Wait… you mean…” she sat beside him.

Then giggled.

„So the two of you… seriously?” her voice would be inaudible to anyone outside the room.

Gustave hid his face in his hands.

„I don’t know how that happened either” he dared to look up and only saw a grin slowly turning into a sad look.

„You do reali…”

„Sciel already told me, I know”

She seemed to give the whole situation a good thought for a moment.

Her brother was in love.

With a human.

Maelle never heard such story, they were all taught to fear humans on sight. Run away.

Not run to them.

She didn’t know how to react properly after the initial laughter. She was not prepared for such scenario.

„I… I’d like to wish you well, but it’s not going to work” she wrapped her thin arms around him as a comforting gesture.

„I know” his whisper carried more pain than he should let show in front of someone entrusted to his care, but he just couldn’t.

He wanted to be with Verso.

It wasn’t the biggest argument Gustave had with Alan but it was one of those that actually made Gustave storm out of the hideout. The look on his face – cold anger, even worse than the inferno of the fury, prevented everyone from following him. He needed a bit of time to cool down and maybe compose himself. For the sake of Maelle and his apprentices if no one else.

- Humans ARE danger, Gustave! Don’t you remember what happened last time? – he growled.

- If you’d only stop seeing black and white you’d have found sense in that – he spoke coldly.

Of course Gustave haven’t forgotten the horrors they went through because of humans, but…

He couldn’t get himself to forget about his angel. He tried. And tried.

But the fascination drew him in. He kept nearing in, circling around so he could at least see him, even if Gustave didn’t get seen by Verso in exchange.

For the better, he lied to his feeelings. He wondered how long that lie could last.