#banel

I do think there’s a way for Angel to be his own person AND be with Buffy, yes. I essentially agree with much of what you say, I don’t want Angel to go back to where he started on BtVS. He has grown so much, become more confident, he now has relationships/friends/family outside of Buffy. These are all good things! He is now much more A Part of This World than he was when they first met. Now their relationship can be much closer to that of a partnership of equals with some push and pull, compromises, shared responsibilities, and leaning on each other, depending on who is fighting the battle of the day.

Do I think there would be some adjustments to be made on both sides? Sure. Probably more on Buffy’s side these days. She is much more used to blind allegiance than to a relationship of give and take. But, personally, I think Buffy could use someone to challenge her. That’s my personal brand of relationship. Someone who loves you but keeps you honest and isn’t afraid to have the hard conversations with you when they disagree. And to that end, I think Joss & Co. are missing out on an opportunity to tell an interesting story about two people who have always loved each other - that’s never really the question - but whether these two leaders can really truly learn to find a balance of power in a relationship. I happen to think they can and that it would be a great story to boot.

One of my favorite lines from @ariaadagio ‘s Some Say Ice: “Besides, isn’t that how this works?” She kisses him again. “I’m there for you, and you’re there for me? A whole big circle of misery and yay and yikes and sometimes kissing?” Because this is what good relationships are all about right? Sometimes it’s about them, sometimes it’s about you, the good, the bad and the in-between. You support each other, without losing yourself completely in the other person. I like the way Aria writes them working together in her story in which Angel is dealing with a crisis and yet Buffy and Angel are clearly the leaders of the team at large. And I think the comic writers could learn a few things from these kinds of stories if their focus wasn’t elsewhere. 

It’s interesting how some fans tend to think that B/A supporters want a retelling of the B/A dynamic of seasons 1-3 of BtVS. Buffy and Angel’s relationship is anything but static. It changes right in front of our eyes on both shows. And honestly, I ship Buffy and Angel more and more as both shows progress. Their stories and journeys parallel each other including sacrifices, becoming parents, depression, waging wars etc. They just need to be afforded the opportunity to share these experiences with each other and perhaps with a newfound understanding of how they have both grown in combination with the fact that they still love each other, they could have a pretty remarkable relationship.

But it seems unlikely we’ll ever know in canon. So everyone should go write fic!

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