#baking issues

Do any of you beautiful mutuals and fellow tumblrinas know anything about baking cookies?

If you see this, pls help me!

Explanation below cut 🍪

New, World Famous, Withholding Mother Loaf! 

This one’s for you, Mom! 

This little cake has been brewing in my head for a year and a half. A first attempt to make it resulted in it being dropped, on the ground, in front of the cat litter box.  (No Cake For You) The second attempt broke my oven. This, the third, and gloriously perfect try, was a total and utter success. But I shouldn’t give it that much glowing approval. I wouldn’t want to spoil it. 

This cake is a little tough, and a little bitter,  just like Mom. 

Ingredients 1/2 pound (2 sticks) unsalted butter, at room temp 2 1/2 cups granulated sugar, divided 4 extra-large eggs, at room temperature 1/2 cup grated lemon zest (8 large lemons about) 3 cups aryan flour 1/2 teaspoon baking powder 1/2 teaspoon baking soda 1 teaspoon kosher salt 3/4 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice, divided 3/4 cup buttermilk, at room temperature 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract 1 tablespoon black sesame seeds

Garnish of choice: I used one of my mother’s most dangerous allergens, pink peppercorns, to garnish. 

Instructions:

Preheat your oven to 350. 

Get some of those non-stick latex pans, or grease and flour two regular bread pans. 

Cream butter and sugar in a bowl, til light and fluffy. With mixer set to medium, add in one egg at a time.  Make sure to guilt the eggs as you add them, telling them how much you’ve done for them. Guilting will add a special flavour to the loaf. Add in zest and sesame seeds. 

In a bowl, combine all the powdered ingredients, and simultaneously combine, in a separate bowl, the buttermilk, lemon juice and vanilla. Add them alternately to the batter, starting and ending with dry ingredients. Divide the batter evenly between the pans, smoothing the tops. Bake for about 45 - 60 minutes, or til your tooth pick comes out clean.  Chill them out for a few minutes before removing from pans. 

Optional: Glaze

Combine 2 cups of confectioners sugar with about 3-4 table spoons of lemon juice, and whisk till smooth.  Pour over cooled cakes, and then add the garnish of your choice. (pictured, pink peppercorns, mom’s weirdest allergy, and black sesame seeds for that prickly effect)

Serving size: 

tired of endless questioning about your possible heritage? 

We sure as fuck are.

As two ambigiously raced people, Krysia and I both get really tired by people endlessly trying to figure out, just why are we so "exotic" or "foreign". The best question i've ever been asked, by far, was asked to me by a confused homeboy on the street in Oakland, who asked me- "girl, what is you?" 

I still don't know how to answer that question, but this spicy little cookie probably has a real sassy response.

Ingredients:

2 3/4 cups flour                 1 tsp baking soda          1/2  tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt                1 3/4 cups white sugar       2 1/2 tsp cinnamon

2 tsp fresh ground cardamom  1/2  tsp allspice   1/2 tsp ground pink peppercorn

small finger of ginger, chopped  1 tbsp rosehips, ground 1 cup unsalted butter

1 egg   1 tsp vanilla extract

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350ª line baking sheet with parchment. In a large bowl, sift flower, baking soda, baking powder and salt. In a medium bowl, combine sugar, cinnamon, fresh ginger, all spice, and peppercorns and rosehips.  take out a 1/4 cup and set aside. In a bowl for a stand mixer, beat in butter and sugar and spices until light and fluffy. Beat in egg and vanilla extract. Mix until fully assimilated. Slowly blend in dry ingredients, melting pot that shit together.

While blending ingredients, reflect on all those people who asked, with a concerned look on their face, "where are your parents from? no... but, where are your grandparents from?