#abusrd

It’s time. Flickering flashlight shoves on dimly bright.  I found my way out of the cave but now what? What is to be done, again, it seems that we are here. Still.  Now the way forward is ancient, dirty and broken.

It seems there was a time to pause longly and to stop for a length, to take in the banality of it all, eve awl, eevvaahhll. Bahhnaal now, no...what?

Seriously.

It seems, but I’m not sure that somewhere someone told them so.  I know, I heard in on the radio. No...I know, not you, you know.

And maybe it was just that split second right there, no over there, to the left.  Over there Katusha got bled upon again by some other an other idiot prince. Always bitter coffee. And what? For what? What. Just What. Wack, wack attack wacky. All over again and again and again. In a tunnel on a train on the bridge the bench and the beach. Birds fly away i don’t want to hear them sing, my ears bleed.

It’s a steel wool scraping and stinging with acid as if that were the only thing to cool my face. My eyes water and I look down, my heart bloats with stale choking air.

I tried. I sure tried. At the end of the day? I tried. I slept but I tried. A walking night terror but I tried.  Not one other thing matters but will, dormant but still ideal. Feeling like steel dealing even still.

Who can say? But I’m here now and then and way back the first. Firstest of the first birther truthers. Its our time trumping the universe. I for one am sorry but it was all out of my hands.  Really it was like this when I got here.  Nothing I can do. My hands are tied. Tied up tight and smashed with a bottle.

But I digress, and regress but not to repress or supress, except for the supressives, the real SP’s always out to get me. And I laugh as I sing songlingly a mockery of the very identity used to diagnose me, it seems that list lostingness is a diagnosis of the western mind lost in distress.

Jauh dari Ibu kota dan tanah kelahiran kita Jarak memisahkan kita dan mereka Sedang kita hanya dipisah oleh beberapa kata Dan diam hanya menjadi sebuah tanda tanya.

Terjaga ditanah Kuta bersama tanda tanya Menjaga agar tanda tanya itu tetap utuh Menanti hari baru sekarang, esok dan lusa. Semoga tanda tanya itu takkan runtuh.

Lelah saya lelah dikejar pekerjaan dan digerus harapan Saya butuh lebih dari sekadar liburan Saya butuh yang lebih dari sekadar harapan Mungkin saya lebih butuh kepastian. Atau tanda tanya itu akan tetap menjadi mimpi tak berkesudahan.

The meaning of life.. and other Updates

I’ve been having existential crisis’ every few days, asking myself questions that no-one really has the answers too. We like to think we have the answers, but we don’t and probably never will. (more…)

We have given our website a long-overdue update: http://www.killyrself.com

You can find more info about our recently launched Kickstarter campaign (that after only 36 hours since launch is already 72% funded) along with the usual fucking bullshit bands put up to make themselves feel important and professional.