I dive into the past where everything still felt alive and everything slowly dies from time to time there is no past, no future, there is only now three minutes ago is the past three minutes from now is the future

I see there's still much life felt there before everything left to find a new place

some letters I wrote seem to have begun to be neglected but the writings within them still remain alive I once stored everything there the places I once lived seem to have started to change I once placed my life there although perhaps everything has changed

if I could retrieve a little happiness from that time perhaps the situation could change slightly I would tell myself to be careful nothing within you has changed what forces change is circumstance

I don't know where all those people are stepping now what I remember before is their greetings that felt warm

some letters I wrote seem to have begun to be neglected but the writings within them still remain alive I once stored everything there the places I once lived seem to have started to change I once placed my life there although perhaps everything has changed

Something something absurdist humor thrives in time of intense political turmoil something something gen z humor is at its heart absurdist

Anyway I've just started it but my favorite quotes so far are

"He created his own Kool-Aid reality and was able to illuminate himself by it"(p. 10)

She’s a girl lost in confusion Standing on the balcony at night Staring at the same sky Realizing no one is ever coming

She writes poetry in the middle of the night Before sleep, she imagines a scenario: What if I died right now? Would someone finally value my writing? She’s too afraid to show it to anyone

She can only be honest with her pen Only the paper truly sees her No one judges her if she’s wrong She’s not sure if any good man would understand She can only smile behind the curtain Only the floor sees her breaking No one really cares if she’s fragile She’s not sure if any good man would understand

She’s a girl who no longer hopes Lying in bed all alone Staring at the same wall Realizing there’s no one there to hold her

She rambles to herself in the night Before sleep, she imagines a scenario: What if I died right now? Would someone finally see me as human? I’ve never truly felt that before

Your request has now been delayed Because it doesn’t meet the requirements There’s ill intent behind it And God said it’s dangerous

I’ve stood before the altar Saying the same thing a thousand times Slowly, I threw away my ego And prayed without demanding Slowly, I let go of my naivety And prayed without demanding

Whoever is sitting up there Just throw me some alcohol, that already helps You don’t need to grant my wish Because I won’t do anything stupid anymore I can handle it on my own Whoever is sitting up there In the sky I can’t pierce through I just want to say, you’re all deaf

Good intentions never work Because there’s always something hidden behind them The angels secretly read my diary Peeking through the cracks of my bedroom

I’ve stood before the altar Saying the same thing a thousand times Slowly, I threw away my ego And prayed without demanding Slowly, I let go of my naivety And prayed without Demanding

My mind cracked as I fell From a speeding train But with no clear direction or destination I realized I had boarded the wrong one

All this time I sat in the back car When I moved to the front It was filled with robots just sitting still Just robots sitting, doing nothing

I wished I could escape this place To reunite my body and soul To become one rhythm, unbroken I thought about jumping off Letting my skull split halfway Only to realize afterward Letting my body bruise all over But feeling the pain afterward But feeling alive afterward

I went to the driver's car There was someone they called God I wasn't allowed to ask, that would be a sin So a guard pushed me back to my seat

Camus sat beside me, just smoking He said, “Just enjoy the ride.” And whispered, “We’re not getting anywhere.” Then started writing again, as usual