What am I even doing here

ok I'm standing up

me when i'm the real slim shady

you cant post shit on this web site

I interned at a place w butterflies and had to tell a mom to please stop offering the “snacks” on the pedestals to her kids and we had to give a speech to all the ppl who entered which I added lines to daily. Including the infamous “butterflies like fruit that’s a little older than what we eat, so the fruit is just for them! Please don’t eat it!” And “please please please please please don’t come in here if you’re afraid of butterflies.” It was the closest thing to hell I’ve ever experienced

*going to a butterfly farm* there better not be any fuckin butterflies in here

how are you 27 talking about Harry Potter why don't you try substance abuse

most important lesson I’ve learned is that if there’s a simple, versatile, comfortable garment that I enjoy wearing, I should buy three of it if I can afford to. cartoon characters got this one right.

came onto this app hoping to see nuanced conversations about the incredible themes and ideas behind fresh (2022) but of course i'm instead seeing folks stanning a violently misogynistic cannibal purely because he's played by seb stan. don't know what i expected.

Imagine what a disaster a pegasus would be. The creature would die if it flew a little too long, but if it landed a little funny it would immediately shatter every bone in its body

New vet today asked me if my eyeless dog was blind and like ??? oh god I hope so????

OP, I am so sorry

love how wikipedia’s “List of unsolved deaths” starts at 11,000 BCE. like, I don’t think we’ll be cracking that cold case anytime soon.

"my child is fine" your child is still running their tumblr blog from middle school

pets sigh so dramatically for little creatures that have nothing to do all day