Zoot Master Flex

all the custies

The best filling ..maybe of all time

noone wanna play volleyball w me

*adds a 😳 to the end of a slightly panicked sentence*

the reactor core is above nominal temperature 😳

God, grant me the serenity to gaslight the things I cannot change; the courage to girlboss the things I can; and the wisdom to gatekeep the difference ❤️

great job being disrespectful

Tysm it’s easy when my pussy is so fucking yummy and not complicit in the murder of innocent people

Are you certain of that?

YUP

swing and a miss, ken

i hate songs that are like 75% bad but the chorus is so good that you suffer through the whole song just to hear one part like three times

the 4 penguins from Madagascar are literally just the Golden Girls’ fursonas

if i get rich my mom gettin paid first thing

I showed my mom this (a genuine doctor) and she says that the inferior vena cava is real so I’m sorry but your post has been canceled op

yeah well this one is even more inferior

just a dogshit vena cava

cashiers don’t actually care what you buy you could buy a fork a toaster and a bath plug and i wouldnt notice all i’m thinking abt is “in five min it will be one hour until two hours before i can go home”

honestly this is so much nicer than red

this is coca-cola i can feel calm drinking. no bright screaming red. no anger. no hatred. just a nice sky blue. this is a soda i can feel relaxed with.

Is everyone on this site a fucking bull?

If you log into the labyrinth, you can’t complain if you see a minotaur