In A Constant State Of Nicotine Withdrawal

i don't tag anything with not safe for work because i want you to look at yuri kink porn on the clock. do your civic fucking duty

Manifesting

White people have something wrong with them

I can't stop thinking about that Baldwin quote about white gays' sense of injustice at not having the world on a plate like they were promised as White Children. You'll never unsee it. Same with white neurodivergent people oh my godddddddd

"comparing apples and oranges" has always been funny to me as an expression because people's go to exampe of two things so radically different that they defy any useful comparison are apples. and oranges. like you would struggle to find a more comparable pair of objects than that. theyre literally sold right next to each other in most stores.

you can't come to my birthday party? aw dang, (remembers it's bad to guilt trip people) this doesn't matter to me at all (remembers to demonstrate that i am affected by you to affirm your positive presence in my life) but while you're away i will die (remembers not to guilt trip again) unpreventably. unrelated to you. don't worry about it. (remembers to express care through actions and not just words) you're in the will.

it's crazy how many health services are harder to access when you're sick/disabled like hi yes if you want an appointment please make a phone call at 8am and then go to an in person appointment and then you may get referred to a specialist three hours away. this is surely fair and balanced yes yes.

I don't need the chatgpt random algorithm to write emails for me because I already have a custom and 100% flawless algorithm called "writing the exact same three emails with the names changed"

"but op I work in an office I have to write way more emails than you" well that's your fault for working in an office i got nothing to do with that

to everyone who wants help with emails: go through the notes of this post. there are ideas I've never thought of and plenty of scripts for all kinds of situations/jobs

I DONT CARE HOW MANY BEDS THERE WERE. WHAT IS YOUR BOOK ABOUT

(tearfully) w- working at the mattress store

i'm so fucking sorry. can you ever forgive me

its terrible for any number of reasons, but i think if we invent immortality there should be an extreme sport called civilizational speedrunning where teams of 20 go into the wilderness somewhere and try and be the fastest build the first internal combustion engine. i bet you could get it down to like 3 years tops

The real trick is to eat seed heavy food before the speedrun starts so your first poops are halfway to agriculture already

i want you on my team holy shit

OH MY GOD?