& you can q u o t e me on that.

Omaha means family.

But hey, who needs liquor when you’re a few steps closer to getting senior breakfast perks at IHOP with your AARP card, am I right?

Ben Farrow had to put on his psycho pants.

Well, you see, when a person with a penis and Jamie Lynn Spears have sex, sometimes they can make little cretins. Didn’t they teach you this in school here?

Lastly, I'd put tracking chips in the Hollingsworths.

Are you dating the last person you talked to?" "Winny? No. She has a nice butt, but she’s not really my type.

We wouldn’t be in this situation if you’d taken it up the ass in the first place!

Give them something that mildly resembles a boob and they’re good to go.

If you had your own fragrance line, what would it be?" "Always Superior by Arlene Takahashi.

Doesn’t your mom know that hot water and cocaine go great together?

Just don’t let the pressure of my pleasure get to you.

Dicks are a dime a dozen, baby.

If chip throwing was in the Olympics, I’d probably get the bronze medal.

God, Frankie, didn't you know the stork is the one that brings the babies?

You should swallow the word of the Lord.

As a Greaser, do you even know about Hulu?

What's an existential crouton?