Still Among Men

“I don’t understand why you don’t want to see your family” Well Grandma, maybe it’s cause you only guilt trip me into wanting to see you. Maybe it’s cause you treated my mother like shit for 20 years and I finally decided that you weren’t worth my time. Maybe it’s cause you are racist. Maybe it’s cause you’re fake as fuck, and like to pretend you like someone to their face but then the second they’re no longer around you’ll talk shit on them. You aren’t my family. You haven’t ever really been my family, so stop trying to pretend like you have.  Yes there are some times that we shared that weren’t that bad. I do appreciate some of the things you taught me growing up, but overall, you are a bad and toxic person and I can’t let your bullshit judgments of me and other people I have cared/care about be invading my life anymore. So please, don’t call me family again.

Things are a bit better now. Still having a little of trouble, but things are at least looking up a bit. I definitely do no wish to relive the last three weeks, and I hope nothing like it ever happens again. 

Heavy fucking week

Having no appetite is a lot of fun.

I’ve forgotten how hard it can be to fight anxious and depressive thoughts.