ST. HOLTZMANN

anyway, newish cdrama sideblog is at a-sea-with-no-shores

that's how long it's been! anyway chapter 22 of Nothing in This World is Safe, an x-rated Ghostbusters: Answer the Call fanfic, is up.

Nothing in This World is Safe: Chapter 22 - If I Float

Chapters: 22/? Fandom: Ghostbusters (2016)

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jillian Holtzmann/Original Female Character(s) Characters: Jillian Holtzmann, Patty Tolan, Abby Yates, Erin Gilbert, Original Female Character(s)

Summary:

Gravity It lifts me up and knocks me off my feet Gravity It's pulling you to me and I can't breathe Will you catch me if I float? Will you catch me if I float?

- "Gravity", Ralph

This chapter is pretty much PWP.

Holtzmann: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside Erin: Erin: Holtzmann, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the sidewalk... Holtzmann: *sips coffee from bowl* Abby: I am not out of control! I'm a law abiding citizen! Erin: Really? Name one law Abby: Don't kill people? Erin: That's on me. I set the bar too low.

Patty: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them. Suggestions? Kevin: Put spaghetti in it. Patty: I'm currently taking suggestions from literally anyone but you. Holtzmann: Put spaghetti in it. Patty: I'm currently taking suggestions from anyone but you two. Abby: Put spaghetti in it. Patty: I'm no longer taking suggestions.

Holtzmann: Whaddya call a fish with no eye? Patty, not looking up: Myxine circifrons Holtzmann: Holtzmann: fsh

Kevin: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Holtzmann: Several traffic violations. Abby: Three counts of resisting arrest. Patty: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Erin: Also, that’s not our car.

Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle. Holtzmann: Shit. Erin: Wait, three? Cop: Yeah? Patty: OH MY GOD ABBY FELL OFF!!!

Holtzmann, banging on the door: Erin! Open up! Erin: Well, it all started when I was a kid... Patty: No, she meant- Abby: Let her finish.

Kevin: I’m an idiot. Holtzmann: Abby: Patty: Erin: Kevin: Holtzmann: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.

Kevin: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life Erin: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years! Abby: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this! Patty: I knew I lost that potential somewhere! Holtzmann: My moral code, is that you? Kevin: Kevin: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?

Erin: What do you think Holtzmann will do for a distraction? Abby: She’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do. *Building explodes and several car alarms go off* Patty: ... or she could do that.

Patty: I can’t believe you live nearby, and you won’t let anyone crash at your place. Holtzmann: You people already know too much about me. Patty: I know exactly three facts about you, and one of them is that you won’t let any of us crash at your place

*The group is getting into the car* Holtzmann: I’m driving. Kevin, out of view: Shotgun! Abby, turning to face Kevin: Aww! But you had it on the way here- Everyone except Kevin: WHOA- Kevin, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *pumps gun*

Holtzmann: Change is inedible. Erin: Don't you mean inevitable? Holtzmann, spitting out coins: No, I did not.

Kevin: *gets down on one knee* Erin: Oh my god, it’s finally happening. Kevin: *falls over* Holtzmann: The poison is kicking in.

Erin: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE Holtzmann: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially Erin, desperately, as Holtzmann’s bleeding intensifies: YOUR BLOOD TYPE Holtzmann: Oh! B positive. Erin: DON’T TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE Holtzmann:

Erin: This is a mistake Abby, enthusiastically: A mistake we're going to laugh about one day! Erin: But not today Abby, still enthusiastic: Oh, no. Today's going to be a mess

Abby, standing with their back turned: I’ve been expecting you, Erin. Erin: How did you do that without turning around? Abby: ... To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you.

Holtzmann: I turned out perfectly fine! Abby: Holtzmann, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast Holtzmann: I DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN!!!

Holtzmann: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died- Jennifer Lynch: Twelve, actually. Holtzmann: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that? Jennifer Lynch: Yours! Holtzmann: That's right: no one's.

Holtzmann: I learned some very valuable lessons from this. Patty: I’m guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should’ve taken away. Holtzmann: Death isn’t real, and I’m basically God.

Erin: Goodnight moon. Erin: Goodnight tree. Erin: Goodnight ghosts that only I can see.

if anyone’s still out there reading, please let me know!

Nothing in This World is Safe: Chapter 21 Chasing Silhouettes

Chapters: 21/? Fandom: Ghostbusters (2016)

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jillian Holtzmann/Original Female Character(s) Characters: Jillian Holtzmann, Patty Tolan, Abby Yates, Erin Gilbert, Kevin Beckman, Original Female Character(s) 

Summary:

We feel warmth in the cold corners Eyes in the back of our heads We roll out when the day's over Chasing silhouettes

When it all goes up in flames When it all goes up in flames When it all goes up in flames When it all goes up in flames We'll be the last ones standing

- "Up in Flames", Ruelle

Holtzmann wears a tuxedo. Tiny food is eaten. Discoveries are made.

And I meant to.

I had the energy to.

I even got started on it.

Then everything just went to hell, health-wise and otherwise, and so I haven’t touched it (or my actual novel!) in months. I was dreaming of maybe spending all day yesterday and today working on Chapter 21, so that I could upload it before, you know, it’s 20-fucking-20, but it didn’t happen.

I did manage to make some progress today. So maybe that bodes well for the new year. I hope so.

Anyway, I’m still here on this planet, and so are you, and I’m glad for that. Happy New Year!