scam caller: hello, how are you today?
scam caller: good. Iβm calling because your IP address has been compromised. Iβll just need you to get in front of your computer so we can get your account fixed up.
me: okay! there is one thing Iβm wondering, though
me: you really couldnβt think of a better lie?
me: like, my βIP address has been compromised.β How, exactly, does an IP address become βcompromisedβ?
me: I was just wondering, is all
scam caller: why did you answer?
scam caller: if you knew this wasnβt a legitimate call, then why did you answer?
me: oh, I just though I would have some fun at your expense.
scam caller: what expense? talking is no expense to me.
me: well, youβre currently not accomplishing your goal
me: your goal of scamming my elderly grandmother. Youβre not accomplishing that. Iβd call that an expense.
scam caller: well, can I scam you?
me: did you- did you ask if you can scam me?
scam caller: yes. can I scam you?
me, baffled: sure, you can try
scam caller: you need to get in front of your computer
me: yeah, thatβs still a problem. Iβm eating tater tots right now and I really donβt feel like getting up.
scam caller: okay. I will call you tomorrow morning, then.
me: I might not answer. My grandma definitely wonβt.
scam caller: You answered today.
scam caller: I will call you tomorrow. Have a good day.